


Between The Bars

by LesbianLemon



Category: Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Because it's me, Crime AU, Detective AU, F/F, Implied Past Non-Con, Medium Burn, Mental Illness, i dunno how to describe it, just wait, probably, sort of reverse slow burn? You'll see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-05-02 22:30:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14554917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LesbianLemon/pseuds/LesbianLemon
Summary: Dealing with her traumas of youth, and still mourning her childhood friend, Detective Kimberly Hart struggles to cope with her life. Caught between haunting dreams of old memories and a mind-numbing present, Kimberly is thrust further into a past she would much rather forget, and unwittingly comes face to face with something that just might give her all the answers she's been looking for.





	1. Lost Youth

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! New fic because I have no life and I love me some pink lemonade! I'm not too sure how long this story is going to be, but we'll just see where this goes! I sorta have a general direction for where I want this to head, but who knows? Part of the fun is making things up as you go!
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this new story, and I look forward to any feedback or speculations! They're always fun to read and make me feel all happy.
> 
> See ya soon!
> 
> (like, really, I have no life.)

A little girl dressed in pink sits on the playground swings, letting her feet drag along the wood chips slowly. She rests her head against the iron chains and watches the world rock beneath her. The skies are cloaked in grey, and the child looks up as a stray drop of water plops onto her forehead. She frowns, but simply pushes herself a little more on the swing. It doesn’t matter to her what the day brings, and it doesn’t matter why, when all she can remember are the lost faces that once carried her higher on the very playset not so long ago.

She remembers the funeral, remembers the somber masks. No one looked at her, no one noticed. She had become lost in a sea of black, as the wooden ships sunk into the earth. She doesn’t remember crying, doesn’t remember feeling anything but downing emptiness and anger. Too young to understand completely, but just enough to know that she would never visit that park with those faces again.

The cedar crunches from a distance, and the girl in pink raises her head to see who had approached. A sunshine yellow baseball cap and faded overalls stands before her. “You’re here again.” The yellow hat says.

“I know.”

The yellow hat tips up and honey hazel eyes peek out from underneath. “Ms. Holly’s gonna be mad when she finds out you’ve been missing.”

The girl on the swing continues her activity. “I know.” she says more deflatedly.

There’s an awkward silence as hazel eyes dart away, and grey sneakers shuffle against the padding underneath them.  “You’re...gonna come back, right?”

“Maybe.” Is all the lost child says. She knows she will. 

“...I thought you really ran away this time.” the yellow hat admits. 

“I always come here. You know that.” The swinging comes to a halt, and the girl looks to her company. “Don’t you?”

Tan fists ball up anxiously, and the yellow hat is removed from its perch, revealing short, brunette hair plaited into two braids. The hat finds its new place atop black tresses, and the girl in pink blinks in mild surprise. “You’re getting wet.” 

The lost child smiles softly. “Thank you.” She stands and take hold of the shy girl’s hand, who in turn looks at their pressing palms in astonishment. “Let’s go back, okay? Before Ms. Holly finds out.”

The hazel eyes blink rapidly, and a nod follows. The two children begin walking away from the hallowed grounds, the girl who now wears the yellow hat swinging her arm as they do so. After a few moments of the movement, the child with hazel eyes slowly begins to swing her arm in tandem as well.

“I’m sorry I made you come looking for me.” Pink apologizes.

“I don’t mind.” says yellow. “It’d kinda stink if you didn’t come back.”

The lost child chuckles, and she grips the hand she holds tighter. It’s silent for another beat before she replies. “You know...if I ever do run away...for real, for real...I’d take you with me.”

“Yeah...I’d take you with me too, Kimmy.”

                    ------------------------

Detective Kimberly Hart blinks her eyes open at the ceiling. It’s another dream, another memory, that’s woken her up in the middle of the night once again. She rolls out of the bed three sizes too large for her to be sleeping alone, and heads to the bathroom. She splashes her face with water a few times, and grumbles at the mess she’s made on the floor. Those skin care commercials are fucking liars. 

She knows she won’t be getting any more sleep any time soon, so she puts in her contacts instead, peeling her upper lid back and blinking a few times to put it in place. She can see clearly now, just how much she looks like shit. Maybe she should just be blind for the rest of the day. She heads out and reads the neon numbers of her bedside alarm clock. 3:38…. Oh well, it’s better than most days.

She opens her curtains and watches the city buzz with life below. There was always something comforting about watching the night life flourish, cars racing even at this hour, windows blinking open with citrine light, signifying that someone else, too, was awake. Going about their day for whatever reason. It was always a mystery, and Kimberly often wondered about the lives inside those yellow windows. Imagining, that maybe those people are up for the same reasons she is. It makes her feel a little less lonely. 

In a couple hours, she’ll start her shift, enter the world of the living, and the dead. It isn’t an easy thing by far, but it’s a reason to get up in the morning, and everything she is lies within her career. She doesn’t know why she sticks with it, when it’s only a reminder of the tragedy in the world, but she figures that maybe...just maybe...she’ll get some answers one day.

                    ----------------------

Kim yawns tiredly, covering her mouth with her hand as the elevator doors open with a _ping!_ She steps over the threshold, and a heavy weight is thrown around her shoulders, jolting her body and causing her to spill her coffee. 

“Ay-yo, Kimmy..!” Zack Taylor greets.

Kim winces at the nickname, and at the hot beverage that soaked through her blazer and onto the flesh of her arm. Zack notices and attempts to help her clean up.

“Oh shit, my bad. Are you alright?”

Kim grunts and nods, the pain subsiding. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good. How do you have this much energy in the morning?”

Her coworker shrugs and gives a lopsided smile. “Guess I’m just an early riser.”

“Well so am I, but I always feel like I got hit by a truck each morning.”

Zack ‘oofs’ and begins walking with her down the hall. “Rough weekend, I’m guessing?”

Kim sighs and runs her fingers through her hair. “Like you wouldn’t believe.” Zack holds open the office door for her and Kim smiles, curtsies, and steps through.

“Well maybe next time you should _invite me_ and then I can make sure you don’t get absolutely shitfaced.”

Kim scoffs. “You mean get shitfaced with me?”

Zack waves his hand dismissively. “Same difference. Point is, we barely get to hang out anymore!”

“Well yeah, cause we were working on a major case.” Kim explains.

“Yeeahhh...buuutt… the case is overrrr..” he sings, grabbing her hands and wiggling his hips. “So that means we get to party!”

Kim laughs as he starts dancing with him, and they snicker when they quickly pull apart, acting nonchalant as one of their superiors walks past, giving them a sideways glance. They giggle quietly, and Kim shoves Zack’s shoulder. “Alright, you’ve convinced me. We’ll start hanging out again.”

“Hell yeah, nothing can stop us! Well, except maybe the cold long dick of the law.”

“Zack, we _are_ the law.”

“Oh, yeah.” he realizes. “You know somehow I keep forgetting that.”

Kim shakes her head. “And now I remember why we never get any work done together.”

Zack gasps dramatically and places his hand over his chest. “Kimberly! We work great together and you know it!”

“You know, if the captain didn’t have such a big crush on you, we both would have gotten fired months ago.”

“Wh- she doesn’t have a crush on me!” her friend stutters.

“Mmm...I beg to differ. But I’m not complaining. I like my job thank you very much.”

Zack folds his arms and raises an eyebrow. “I thought you hated your job.”

“What makes you think that?” she asks.

“Because I always hear you mumbling to yourself about how much you hate your job.”

Kim takes a sip of her coffee. “It’s got its ups and downs. But it’s all I’ve got.”

“Well thank god I’m here to make it better. You and me, we’re like modern day superheroes; catching bad guys, looking hot while doing it…” 

Kimberly laughs and Zack’s grin widens. “Can’t argue with you there.”

Zack’s attention is diverted as one of their other coworkers calls him over. “Ah, Briggs is calling me. Talk to you later, Kim!”

“Yeah, see ya.” she gives a little wave to him and heads over to her desk, a stack of papers waiting for her. She sighs, and gets to work, leaving her coffee abandoned for the next hour or so.

It was true, their department had recently wrapped up a particularly troubling case, and it was a major success for everyone, but it still held little satisfaction for Kim. Sure, they had caught a despicable criminal, but there were far too many things left unraveled that Kim wasn’t very fond of. Now, it was back to paperwork. Filing forms, submitting forms, perusing databases and slipping back into a dull meander of life. 

She’s always been a restless person, has always sought freedom. In her line of work, it’s easy to feel trapped, but Kim supposes she’s mainly responsible for that. And yet, she can never give up. There’s always something pushing her to be better, to keep moving forward. If only she weren’t so stuck in the past…

                    --------------------

“Leave her alone!” the girl in yellow cries, stepping in between Kim and the two boys harassing her.

“And what are you gonna do about it, shorty?” One of them asks, shoving her shoulder with a snicker. 

“Yeah, we just wanna play..” the other says, a gross snort coming from his pig-like nose. 

“Doesn’t matter, I said leave her alone!” the girl says boldly, fists balled up at her sides. 

“Well we’re not doing her any harm...right, Kim?” The first boy asks, hand resting on the wall besides Kim’s head posessively.

Kim doesn’t say anything, doesn’t make any sudden movements. She simply keeps her mouth shut and shrinks back against the wall, keeping her eyes glued to something indiscriminate on the floor. The pig-faced boy grins at his friend, and he seems more than content to watch in amusement.

“See? She’s not saying no..”

“And I said it doesn’t matter! Leave her alone, or you guys are gonna regret it!”

The first boy turns to her, a scowl on his face. He’s twice her size, with wild hair and a million freckles. He leaves Kim out of focus as he then makes his way to the girl in yellow. “Just get out of here, freak. This stuff is for grown ups.”

“Kim’s not a grown up!” the girl says, eyebrows knit together in rage. “And neither are you! Stop acting so old and just leave my friend alone!”

“Listen here, you little-”

_bam!_

A tiny fist slams into the boy’s face, but it’s enough to send him stumbling back.

“Bitch!” the boy says, and his minion gasps silently and rushes over to his side.

“You okay, Jake?” he asks worriedly, but Freckles is holding his nose and pushing him out of the way.

“I’m gonna kill her!” he screams, and the girl’s hazel eyes widen when she sees the boy advance.

“Uh-oh.” she says to herself, and takes off running with the two bullies giving chase. 

She runs through the fields behind the brown building, and looks back to check if they were still following her. They were. Good. That means Kim can escape. She directs her eyes back in front of her, and she darts for the thin line of trees up ahead. The girl is quick footed, agile. She slips through the trees and other foliage, panting as she hears the boys on her heels like rabid dogs. 

“This way! Hurry up, dumbass!” she hears Freckles say, and the other boy makes some comment about how his friend has always been faster.

She can hear the footsteps getting closer, and panic begins to set in. Great, great, great! She just _had_ to punch him! Violence never solves anything! But then again, she’s not a very threatening person on her own so violence it is! She runs a little faster, and leaps over one of the fallen trees. But the ground is uneven under her feet, and she stumbles, falling to her knees as the yellow hat flies off her head. Freckles is right behind her, and she scrambles to get back up. As she does, she’s knocked back down again as Freckles wrestles her to the mud. 

The girl kicks and tries to wiggle out of his grasp. She’s not nearly as strong as she thinks she is, and the bully has a clear advantage over her. But it doesn’t stop her from resisting, from trying her hardest. 

“Stop fussing!” the older boy says, pinning her wrists to the ground as his heavy-breathing cohort finally catches up, sputtering out a couple coughs.

“You-you got her, Jake!” he says, amazed.

“ ‘Course I did, Jimmy. She’s just a little _brat_.” The girl inhales and hocks a wad of spit into his cratered face. He grunts and squints his eyes shut tight. He slowly opens them and seethes. He raises her shoulders only to slam her back into the mud again. “I’m getting real sick of you, kid!” He holds her down with one hand and pulls a small pocket knife out from his ragged coat. “See this? This is gonna go right across your throat!”

Those hazel eyes widen and she begins to thrash again. “No, please don’t!” She squeals, but the boy is already raising the blade to her. She shuts her eyes tight in preparation, sucking in what she believes will be her final breath. There’s a groan and a heavy thud, and the blade just knicks a line across her cheek. She whimpers, but when the weight tumbles off her, she opens her eyes to see Kim, brandishing a bulky tree branch about the same size as her. Pig-nose takes a step backwards as Kim swings around to him.

“You want some too?!” she yells, and the cowardly bully quickly shakes his head.

Freckles is back up again, and he’s holding his head in pain, still gripping onto the knife. “Fucking...brat..” he winces, and takes a wobbling step towards Kim.

“Don’t come any closer!” she warns, but the boy doesn’t stop his advancement.

“Oh come on, you didn’t have a problem before..” he mocks, and Kim’s hands grip tighter around the bark.

“I’m not afraid of you!” she declares, backing away as he takes another step forward. “I’ll-I’ll hit you again!”

“Don’t be silly, Kim...we can still make up, can’t we? I’ll be real nice..” he lies.

“N-no!”

The freckled boy pauses for a moment. “What did you just say to me?”

“I...I said no!” Kim says more boldly.

“ ‘No’? You don’t say no to me-Agh!”

Kim gives another mighty swing, and the branch collides into the side of the boy’s face. The force knocks him over, and he’s holding his jaw, yelling with a lisp as Kim drops the tree branch and yanks her friend off the ground.

“My tooth, my tooth! That bitch knocked out my fucking tooth!”

The girl looks up at her savior in astonishment, but Kim tugs on her hand. “Come on, come on, we gotta go!”

She quickly scoops up her yellow hat from the ground and looks back as Kim leads her deeper into the woods. The boys are searching the ground for Freckles’ missing tooth, and the girl with hazel eyes can’t help but chuckle. She looks back to Kim, and in that moment, the girl in pink looks like a superhero. She becomes lost in her thoughts when suddenly Kim hides them under the cover of an open cave. 

Kim ducks through the vines over the entrance and the two girls flatten themselves against the wall. They take heavy breaths, little hearts pounding against their chests. A minute of silence goes on, and they relax, realizing that they have successfully escaped. They plop down on the ground and each let out a sigh. Kim turns to the brunette and looks at her face. “You’re hurt..” she says sadly, and her partner just shrugs, averting her eyes.

“ ‘s nothing…” she mumbles, and Kim takes a handkerchief out from her dress pocket. She carefully dabs at the blood and pulls back when her friend winces. “I’m sorry.”

The brunette shakes her head gently. “I’m okay. You didn’t have to do that, though...now they’re gonna be after you even more…”

Kim folds the handkerchief neatly and sets it on her lap. “I know...but they’re just bullies. I can handle a couple bullies.” She flexes her skinny arm and smiles. “See? I’m strong, just like you!” Those hazel eyes stare, and Kim clears her throat embarrassedly, lowering her arm.

“I’m...not that strong…” the girl tells her.

“What? Of course you are! You punched Jake! You saved me!”

“You saved _me_!” she counters. “If it wasn’t for you, he would’ve got me good…” Kim’s friend draws her knees up to her chin and hugs them. “I’m not strong at all..”

Kim watches her with a frown. She looks around the cave and finds the muddied yellow hat on the ground between them. She picks it up and tentatively wipes it off the best she can. “Well...I think you’re strong..” she confesses, a small smile on her lips. She cradles the hat in her hands and turns it over before fitting it over brunette plaits. “You’re my hero..”

Her friend looks to her, wide eyes examining Kim’s face with admiration and bashfulness. A blush paints her cheeks and she lowers the hat’s visor over her face as the embarrassment of the complement sinks in. Kim giggles cutely.

“Hey, if you’re my hero...can I be the princess?”

The blush turns redder, and the girl in the yellow hat lets out a muffled squeal. She inhales deeply and Kim sees the slightest of nods. She finds her best friend incredibly cute like that, and Kim is glad that even in such a horrid place, they had found each other. A look of curiosity arrives to Kim’s face, and she takes a moment to debate with her own thoughts. She decides, and scoots a little closer to the bashful girl who doesn’t seem to notice. 

Kim’s palms are beginning to sweat, and she begins to think that maybe this isn’t such a good idea. But her hand is inching closer to the girl’s hand, and she lightly pulls it out from the other to rest her pinky on her friend’s shorter one. Kim looks away so that she doesn’t see the strange look her best friend will give her. Her cheeks feel warm, and she’s tempted to snatch her hand away before the girl’s pinky curls around her own and eventually links the rest of their fingers together. 

The lost girl peers down at their hands, then to the bashful girl’s face, which is still hidden in her knees. She waits for the moment to absorb, and hazel eyes peek out at her as the girl turns her face to Kim. 

“I..You’re my...best friend….” the girl tells her, and Kim’s heart beats a little faster.

“You’re my best friend, too, Trini..” Kim replies, and Trini smiles at hearing her name being said so softly.

Trini squeezes Kim’s hand tighter, and a frown of worry appears on her face. “You’re really my best friend, Kim…” she says, her voice wavering. “Don’t ever leave me, okay…?”

Kim presses the sides of their bodies together and squeezes Trini’s hand back. “I’m never gonna leave you, Trin. Never ever..”

                    ------------------------

“Trini…” Kim mumbles, drool spilling onto one of the beige folders on her desk. A hand shakes her shoulder, and she jolts awake, turning around to see who was behind her.

“Kim, it’s after hours, what are you still doing here?”

It’s Zack, and after a quick once-over the room, he appears to be the only one there aside from her. The office is dark, and only a harsh white light comes from Kim’s desk lamp. She relaxes and combs through her hair to keep appearances. “Just thought I’d get a little extra work done...Lots of papers and all that…What are you doing here?”

Zack quirks his lips to the side, and though it’s obvious he doesn’t buy it, he says nothing about it. “I forgot something, and Ray let me in.”

“You gotta love Ray.”

“Everybody loves Raymond.” Zack says, and Kim nods in agreement. “It’s late,” he continues, “You should go home.”

Kim sighs and gathers up her belongings. “You’re probably right. ...Huh.” she says, pausing for a second. “You actually make sense for once.”

Zack grins and crosses his arms. “Someone’s gotta watch out for your ass.” Kim stands and Zack gives her a playful smack on her behind. “Now go on, get outta here!”

“Yeah, yeah, okay~” Kim sings, chuckling as she walks to the exit. “Goodnight, Zack.” she says fondly, and Zack wishes her the same. 

She pushes open the door and heads to the elevator,  waiting patiently for it to arrive. The mechanisms rumble, and the doors slide open with a beep. Kim steps in and makes her way to the back, holding the strap of her satchel as she watches the elevator doors seal her inside. With another groan, the elevator descends, and Kim stares at her reflection in the shining steel, the mask on her face slipping away in her solitude. She grips the strap tighter.

“I miss you...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://open.spotify.com/user/uxykmjy9jo6fdlvk7h6i7zefr/playlist/2vjKGryLp0cxTh2Pbq297d?si=plTZZWAnR9ukmToO8Bkn1g 
> 
> I've made a playlist for this fic on spotify if you guys wanna check it out cause I'm lame and I like to listen to fitting music when I write.


	2. Memories, Running Through My Bloodstream

The wind howls outside the walls, and Kimberly pulls the covers up to her chin, peeking around the room. She’s not afraid of monsters, or the boogeyman. No, there’s something much more terrifying than any of that; she’s scared of being alone. She’s afraid of the quiet. The other girls in her room are fast asleep, and though she knows them hardly, Kim is terrified that they’ll suddenly stop breathing, and there will be no one else to turn to. The first night in the orphanage is the worst. She screams, and she cries when the night comes. Tossing and turning, reaching out for arms that will never hold her again.

The other girls hate her, she knows this. She’s too clingy, too annoying. She’s the girl who cries, and the girl who somehow also feels nothing. She draws too much attention, even though most times she doesn’t want it. Kim hears them whisper, hears all the comments the other children make from day one. She would be lying if she said it didn’t hurt at least a little, but it doesn’t hurt as much as it could, and Kim thinks that maybe that’s fine. Deep down, she knows she’s being selfish, knows that she’s not the only one who’s lost their family, but it doesn’t stop the nightmares, and it doesn’t stop the emptiness she feels. 

Most days she stares out the window, watching the one or two cars that would sometimes pass by on the far off road.  She used to imagine that her parents would come back for her-turn their car down the street and whisk her away. But after days, weeks, months of waiting...Kim stopped imagining. Occasionally, a car actually will pull up, and some carbon copy couple will enter the facility in hopes of bringing a new child home with them. Kim gets ready as the others do, combs her hair back and pins her signature butterfly barrette into her hair.

And they love her. They say she’s adorable, says she’s the perfect little lady. But...they never pick her. Kim wonders why. Maybe she’s not cute enough. Maybe she’s not smart enough. Maybe...they can see that she’s just a lost child...a poor kid who can try all she wants, but nothing can fix her. “That’s okay”, Kim tells herself. “I’ll be free one day, and then I’ll be happy. Then I’ll be loved.”

Ms. Holly is a boring woman. She is grey in every sense of the word. She wears a permanent scowl, and while she isn’t terribly cruel, she definitely has her moments, but she tends to sweep unpleasant things under the rug. Kim isn’t entirely sure if that’s any better. She brings in someone new one day. It’s a cold day of winter, and as she introduces the child lazily to the rest of the orphanage, Kim drowns out whatever the old woman is saying, and continues to stare wistfully out the window. 

“Introduce yourself.” Ms. Holly prods.

“....Trini.” says the new girl, and Ms. Holly seems unsatisfied with that answer. She presses for more, and when she receives no answer, Ms. Holly scowls and eyes the yellow hat upon the girl’s head.

“I’m talking to you, young lady!” Ms. Holly escalates. “And take that hat off indoors!”

The moment Ms. Holly snatches the hat off, the girl screams bloody murder. She fights to get the cap back, and Ms. Holly holds it higher and takes a step back in surprise, absolutely dumbfounded by the reaction. 

“Get a hold of yourself, child!” she says, and the girl’s eyes are brimming with tears. She’s mumbling desperately for the woman to give her hat back, and there’s a moment where the child tears her own hair and drops to the floor in frustration, reduced to a shaking ball.

Ms. Holly is mortified, and she quickly thrusts the hat back into the girl’s arms. The child pulls it back and hugs it, before slipping it back onto her head. All the children, including Kim, stare at her then. They say nothing, and Ms. Holly clears her throat, tells them to be ready for dinner, and the group disperses. Kim glances back at the tiny girl on the floor as she enters the hall, and her breath catches in her throat when the girl’s hazel eyes meet hers.

The days carry on, and it’s not really different with another mouth added to the mix. Everyone avoids the new girl, and the whispers that once held Kim’s name latch onto Trini’s. She’s an easy target, for sure. Small and scruffy, reclusive and quiet. Not to mention the whole “hat incident”, as the event becomes known as. Everyone wonders why the new kid suddenly freaked, and it had become a sort of game to create more and more outrageous reasons for it.

Kim is a little relieved, to have some of the prying eyes off her back, but she can’t help but feel a little guilty. Just a little. She watches the teasing escalate, until one day, Brigitte Cooper decides it would be funny to steal Trini’s beloved hat and play hot potato with it.  There’s malicious laughing as the bullies toss it to each other and Trini scrambles to retrieve it. It’s sad, really, but then Trini is pummeling Brigitte with her tiny fists, and the other children shriek and call for Ms. Holly. 

The girl’s eyes hold a fiery fury within them as she stares down her tormentors and dons her cap again. Ms. Holly calms the situation just enough, and from that point on, everyone knows not to take the hat ever again. They’ll just have to keep wondering. Ah, but none of that matters to Kim. No...not when Jake and Jimmy arrive.

They’re 13, the oldest now amongst the children, and it’s obvious that they’re no good. It’s not long before the balance is disrupted, and the two preteens have everyone under their fingers. Kim tries to ignore them, she really does, but Jake seems to have other plans. He tries to talk to her, always makes an excuse to brush up against her in the hall. Mentions how grown up she is, gets a little too close, a little too often, and seems to find her everywhere she goes.

“You’re pretty cute.” He says to her one night. “Not like any of the other girls here.” Kim says nothing. It must have been the wrong answer. “Hey, I gave you a complement! Don’t be so stuck up!”

He stomps forward, and Kim’s shoulders tense. “Th-thank you.”

The freckled boy relaxes, and he sits next to her on the loveseat beneath the windowsill. “I like you, Kim. I think you’re cool.” Kim shuffles away from him a little, eyes flickering from the window to the boy in her peripherals. He scoots closer. “Well..? Don’t you like me too, Kim?”

His eyes burn a hole through her, and the way his hand grips her knee sends a wave of panic through her. “L-let go, please…”

“I’m not doin’ nothin’” Jake says, fingers brushing against the hem of her skirt. “Just being friendly is all. You don’t have any friends, right? Neither do I! See how this works?”

Kim tries to get up, but the boy pulls her back down and squeezes her wrist tightly. She goes to yell, but Jake slaps his hand over to her mouth. “I’m talking to you, bitch! If you don’t shut up and sit still, I’ll tell Ms. Holly you’ve been sneaking out! And then you’ll really get in trouble.”

Kim’s back is pressed uncomfortably against the window, and she trembles under his beady dark eyes. She stays silent. He can tell Ms. Holly, and it won’t change a thing, but right now...Kim doesn’t want to think about what Jake will really do.

The freckled boy decides his opportunity is now, and Kim squints her eyes shut and whimpers at his breath against her neck. She doesn’t know what’s happening, or why, but she feels disgusting. Her eyes stare out the window, into her own reflection. The world fades, and she imagines that she’s back home on Christmas eve with her parents. A shape appears in the reflection behind her, and both she and Jake turn to face the intruder.

Trini stands across the hall, jaw hanging open slightly as she stands in her pajamas. Freckles pulls away from Kim, and he jumps to the other end of the loveseat. “G-get out of here!” He yells, an angry red tint on his cheeks.

“Why are you smelling her neck?” she asks. “...I don’t think she wants you to.”

“None of your business!” He stands up and points down the hall. “None of your damn business! Now get out of here before I kick your ass!” 

Trini ‘s eyes dance between Kim and the older boy. Her eyes fall to Kim, and her heart breaks at the look of absolute resignation on her face. She thinks that maybe she should say something else, do anything, but she’s stuck in an indecisive rut.

“Go on, get!”

She looks to freckles, and turns her head down, heading back down the hall. Jake sighs annoyedly and ruffles his hair. “Shit, now I’m not in the mood…” He clicks his tongue and points at Kim. “And don’t you even think about trying to tell anyone, got it?” There’s no answer, but the boy leaves it alone this time. “I’ll see you around.” And with that, he heads down the opposite end of the hall, and Kim is left alone again. This time, she’s a little relieved.

                        -------------

She sobs silently in her bed that night, holding herself and feeling even more forsaken than before. She holds her pillow to her face so she doesn’t wake the other girls up again, but it does little to help her emotions. The door creaks open, and there’s a little pitter pat of feet against cold wood that gets closer and closer. Kim freezes, holds her breath, and prays that Jake hasn’t changed his mind.

A soft hand taps her shoulder, and Kim remains still in her confusion. The hand taps again, and there’s a sigh when Kim doesn’t react. The pitter pat makes its way around to the other side of the bed, and Kim is surprised to see Trini’s wide eyes staring at her.

“Didi..?”

“It’s Trini.”

“Oh, sorry. ….What are you doing here?”

Trini kneels beside the bed and drums her fingers on the mattress. “I wanted to make sure you were okay…”

Kim tilts her head. “Why would you do that?”

The girl in yellow pajamas glances around the room for distraction, but her eyes eventually land back on Kim’s. “You looked like you were scared...and sad, I think…”

Kim clears her throat and wraps the blanket tighter around herself. “I’m not sad..”

But Trini’s small fingers are wiping Kim’s tears from her eyes. “But you’re crying…”

Kim rubs her eyes with the back of her hand quickly. “No, I’m not. See?”

Trini smiles slightly at that. “Well, since you’re not crying _anymore…_ That’s good. Now go to sleep.”

“I...can’t.”

“How come?”

“I’m afraid…”

“Of what? Monsters?”

“....Yes.”

Trini seems to think about it for a second. “Yeah, monsters are pretty scary. But I’m scarier.” Kim has to cover her mouth to stop the snort she makes. “Wh-I’m scary!”

“No, not really...You’re so small..”

“But I’m feisty!” Trini folds her arms across her chest. “I can take any monster I see. In fact, monsters run away when they see me!”

Kim chuckles softly and hugs her pillow. “They must be baby monsters.”

Trini grumbles and stands. “Fine, if you don’t believe me, I’ll just let the monsters eat you.” She turns her back and begins to take a step forward. Kim’s not sure what makes her do it, but she suddenly reaches out and holds tight onto the smaller girl’s arm to stop her.

“No, wait!”

Trini looks back at her. “What?”

“I...don’t want the monsters to come for me. ...When I’m all by myself.”

Trini stares at her for what feels like a solid five minutes, before she sighs and shrugs. “Fine.” She gently wiggles her arm and Kim lets go. “I’ll make sure no monsters come, but you better not hog all the covers.” She nudges Kim with her shoulder. “So scooch over!”

Kim smiles brightly and makes room for the junior monster hunter, who plops down and yanks the covers over herself. “Thanks..” Kim whispers, and Trini shrugs. “ ‘S nothing. Now go to sleep!”

Kim smiles and nods. “Goodnight, Trini.”

“Night.”

Kimberly closes her eyes and sighs contently, the nervousness and tears fading away with Trini by her side. It only takes about ten minutes  before the entire blanket is wrapped around Trini completely like a cocoon, but Kim doesn’t mind. She snuggles up to her instead, and that’s perfectly alright. Things could be worse.

                    ----------------------

Kim’s phone hums on her nightstand, illuminating the darkened ceiling of her apartment. She blinks her eyes open tiredly, strains to see and fumbles around for her cell. Her hand lands on something lumpy, and she furrows her brows, unsure of what it could be. She rolls over and her nose nearly bumps into the face of a man she doesn’t recognize. Her eyebrows peak, and she holds her head as the memories of early that night resurface.

“Shit..” She whispers, and carefully slips out of bed. She makes her way to the other side and answers the call. “Hello..?”

“Kim.” Zack answers. “Get dressed, and meet me on 5th.”

“Can it wait until tomorrow…?” she groans quietly.

“Probably not. We got a body.”

Her tone shifts, and she searches for fresh undergarments. “Give me eight.” she says, and hangs up. She pulls the lamp string and the room blinks to life. The man in her bed grumbles and rolls over, hair mussed from sleep. “Hey, what’re you doing..? It’s like two a.m. or something..”

Kim hops into her pants and bounces towards her closet. “Sorry, but you gotta go.”

He laughs in disbelief. “You’re kicking me out?”

“Yup, see ya.”

He realizes she’s serious and scoffs. “Seriously?”

“Yup, I’ve got work to do. Get out.”

The man rolls his eyes and takes his sweet time getting half dressed. “Whatever...thanks for the good fuck.”

“Mmhm.” She slips on her shoes and grabs her ID as her one night stand shuffles out the door. This is fine. It doesn’t matter. They all leave eventually.

She arrives on scene, a swarm of police vehicles and forensics. There only a few persons gathered inquisitively just behind the yellow police tape, muttering and whispering to each other- straining to see further into the restricted area. Kimberly exits her vehicle, makes her way to the front line and flashes ID, slipping under the tape when an officer nods his approval. 

Zack is talking to a woman who leans against the sheriff's squad car, listening attentively and taking notes as the woman gives her witness report. He’s good. With his natural charisma and good looks, it’s no surprise that he usually handles crowds and witnesses. Though obviously traumatized, the woman seems at ease with the officer, and Kim has to admire the man for it. If she were to think of the ideal cop, it would be him. In some ways at least. Zack nods sympathetically and leaves the witness to another officer. He spots Kim and heads over to her. 

“What’ve we got?” she asks, and Zack pockets his notepad.

“White male, early thirties. We haven’t identified who he is yet.” he tells her as they head into the alley, more policemen plastered around the entrance.”I’ve gotta warn you, it’s some fucked up stuff.”

Kim doesn’t bat an eye. “I think I can handle it.”

Zack makes an uncertain hum, and leads her into the back door of one of the shops. The walls are pristine, and besides a couple shelves, the room is strangely bare. It’s nothing terrible, until Kim’s eyes land on the body. Strung up from the ceiling like a pig, stripped down to his soiled underwear. His eyes are rolled back into his head, and the blood that trickles out of his mouth runs down his forehead and drips to the floor underneath him. 

A camera shutter goes off, and Kim spots Billy Cranston, their department’s best forensics analyst. His camera is angled up towards the body, snapping pictures from different angles as he circles around it.

“Heyyo, Billy.” Zack greets, and Billy pulls away from the camera and gives him a bright smile. 

“Hi Zack! Oh, and Kimberly, you too!” He shuffles around to them. “I’m almost done here, so you guys caught me at a good time!”

“What can you tell us?” Kim asks, focus kept to the victim hanging up above. The body is bisected from his the bottom of his stomach to the top, intestines dangling out. Kim winces as part of it plops to the floor, and Billy jumps a pace back. 

“It’s odd. The place is entirely clean apart from the floor underneath him. There’s the obvious gash in his stomach…” Billy walks to the body again, mindful not to step in any evidence, and points to the man’s neck.  “And his throat is sliced open. No murder weapon, no fingerprints, and I’m pretty sure the instrument used to create both wounds is some sort of jagged, serrated knife.”

“A cut like that? There should have been tons of blood splatter on the walls, right?” Zack asks.

Billy hums and paces around the body. “The cuts are clean, and precise. Someone obviously knows what they’re doing. My guess is that the body was strung up before the murder, so that all the blood would flow down naturally-it’s like cutting off the head of a chicken.”

Zack and Kim both wince at the analogy. “Jesus, Billy…”

But Billy doesn’t seem to understand, giving a confused head tilt. He shrugs it off and continues, pointing out the evidence as he goes. “But, there’s also heavy bruising on his torso, and though it’s a little hard to see because of the blood, there’s also bruising on his face too.”

“So they beat him like a pinata?”

“I don’t think so. But it was definitely a blunt force object though. Maybe a pipe?”

Kim absorbs the information, but there’s something strange about it all. Something she feels she should recognize. “Wait a minute…” she says, stepping closer to the victim. Zack advises her not to touch anything, but she drowns him out. She examines the face, squints, and tries to imagine it without the heavy bruising and bloodstains. She hears Billy ask if she’s alright, but his words are lost as a youthful version of the man’s face comes to mind.  A round face and small, brown eyes that sit too close to his pudgy nose-his pig-like nose.

Kimberly stumbles back and puts her hand over her mouth to suppress her bubbling emotions. Zack catches her and holds her still. “Kim? What’s wrong, are you okay?”

“I-I know him, Zack. Jimmy, Jimmy Orwell. I know him.” 

Zack and Billy glance to each other, nod, and Zack pulls Kimberly out through the back door into the valley again. “It’s okay, Kim, it’s okay.”

Kim shakes her head, balls her fists into Zacks shirt as memories linked to the man flood her mind. One half of the duo that tormented her daily, one half who watched on while his friend threatened her into submission when she was alone, one half who occasionally joined in. One half who had found his pride and confidence, at the expense of Kim’s own.

                    -----------------

The pig’s laughter fills the room, and there’s heavy panting from the freckled monster that breathes like a poisonous fog on Kim’s face. She watches the lone bulb sway hypnotically overhead. The air is suffocating in the toolshed, and Kim hopes-prays- that someone will come save her again. She mentally calls out for her mother, her father. Asks them to come home. She calls out for her knight, she begs her to escape with her, but she already has. Long gone, far away, somewhere that Kim can never reach. The tears disappear, with no strength left to cry. She watches the light swing overhead. Swinging, swinging… She calls out for Trini. But she doesn’t come. 

                    ----------------------

“What do you remember about him?” the sergeant asks.

Kim sits in the chair across from her coworker, feeling as though she was answering for her own crimes. Her eyes stare at her murky reflection of the steel table, and her entire body feels numb.

“I know this is hard for you, Kim, but right now you’re the only lead we’ve got.”

“What about the witness report?” She asks, voice just above a whisper.

The sergeant hums and leans back in his chair. “Just that she had gotten off shift and heard something strange coming from the old shop across the street.”

“Zack said there was more to it.”

“That’s true. The witness says she saw a ‘mysterious figure’  leave through the back door with a duffel bag of some sort.”

“No features?” 

“Not that anyone could see.”

“So…it could be anybody.”

“Yes, Kimberly...it could be anybody.” He takes a sip from his water cup, then sets it down again, taking time to carry the topic further. " judging by your reaction last night, you knew James pretty well, correct?”

The memories scrape against Kim’s head, and she closes her eyes as they push themselves to the forefront. “It was never James, always “Jimmy”. We...grew up in the same orphanage together as kids. Sandy Pine, near Reno. I...never really knew him well. He was-he was a bully. But once I left, I never heard from him or anyone else.”

The sergeants face is unreadable, and his elbow rests on the table as he watches her intently. “So you wouldn’t say you were on particularly…good terms, so to speak?”

Kim knows she’s showing signs of anxiety, of nervousness. She knows the sergeant thinks she’s hiding something-and she is- but if he thinks she has anything to do with Jimmy’s murder, he’s completely wrong. She just can’t bear to speak the past into existence any more than needed. “No. He was a bully, and I didn’t like him. But I never looked back from that godforsaken place-not once. I left everyone behind, and I created a new life for myself. I don’t have anything to do with Jimmy Orwell, or his death. I’m just as blind as you are.”

“We’ve done some digging.” He tells her. “Jimmy ran a sex shop not too far from where we found the body, and in a search through his home, turns out he’s been harboring a sizeable amount of narcotics. I’m assuming you don’t know anything about that, either?”

“No.”

He hums again. “Right now, we’re considering some pissed off drug dealers, but...it all seems a little too complicated for that, don’t you think?”

Kim eyes him incredulously. “What are you saying..?”

The sergeant exhales through his nose and leans forward. “I’m saying it looks personal, Kim.”

She scoffs in disbelief and shakes her head a little. “You really think I killed him?”

“You went catatonic when we found the body. Taylor had to get you out of there. And what’s more, he tells me you went home late last night-just a few hours before we got called out.”

“I just saw the body of someone I knew! That messes anybody up! And I went straight home after I left the office!” she shouts, and the sergeant’s voice raises as well.

“Oh really? Odd. Because you normally make a left off Cannon, don’t you?”

Kim is stunned into silence, and her shoulders stiffen as she recalls the night. Crying, in the elevator. She remembers the familiar pang of emptiness in her chest, remembers the ravenous feeling of needing to be filled, to forget everything and have someone else manually fill up that emptiness. 

The bar wasn’t as packed as she had hoped, but the blaring music and burning warmth of the tequila down her throat was enough. Enough, until nameless beefcake attempts to hit on her. It’s disgusting, and Kim knows she’ll hate herself later for it, but she needs to be filled, and that’s as good as she’ll get. The rest of the night is a complete blur, and she only recalls, then, the phone call.

“I went to the bar.” she admits finally. “Took someone home.”

“What time? With whom?”

“I….I don’t remember.”

“Can you give me a description of the man you were with?”

She tries. Really tries, to recall any defining features of the man in her bed, tries to bring up just _one_ characteristic...but all she sees imagines is a pair of brunette braids and a dirty yellow hat.

There’s a heavy sigh, and the sergeant leaves his seat. “I like you, Kim. You’re a good cop, and deep down, I don’t think you’re a murderer. I really don’t. However...until we can find any new leads...we’ll be keeping an eye on you as well. Go home, but...remember, you’re not clear yet.”

She leaves, and ignores the worried glances Zack gives her on her way out. She knows he’s itching to talk to her, ask her too many questions that she doesn’t have any of the answers to. It irritates her. She holds her head high, makes her way to the elevator once again.

Something’s not right. It’s common practice to investigate those who were close to the victim(you may never know, after all), but Kim has never been particularly ‘close’ to Jimmy. She never wanted to, and after she had made her escape, she wished everything and everyone she knew would just disappear.

Her eyes are filled with sadness at that thought. If she had known that the universe would grant her one wish, then she would have made just one exception to it.


	3. 27 Hours

“Do you think there’s life out there, somewhere?” she asks, stars reflected in her eyes. “That there’s something greater than us?”

“I don’t know.” comes the reply. “Anywhere is better than here.”

Trini hums and folds her arms behind her head on the grass. “I wonder what it’s like, out in the city.”

“You’ve never been?”

She shakes her head. “The park is the closest I’ve ever gotten to it.”

“Oh.” Kim watches the dancing lights above wistfully. “It’s crazy. Everyone’s so busy, always rushing to get somewhere. But I liked it. You got to meet all kinds of people, and there was always something going on.”

The girl in the yellow hat makes a grunt. “Sounds exhausting.”

Kim laughs and shakes her head, rolling over onto her side to face her friend. “It wasn’t so bad. One day, we’ll get our own apartment and live together. And I’ll show you all the cool stuff!”

“You really think that’s gonna happen, princess?”

“Well, I know it will. Because I’m getting out of here once I get the money, and I’m gonna drag you with me everywhere I go!”

Trini snorts and rolls onto her side, raising an eyebrow to the girl with the butterfly barrette in her hair. “What money, Kim? Where are we gonna get it?” 

Kim gives a weak shrug of her shoulders and nuzzles her cheek into the crook of her arm. “I dunno, odd jobs, selling crappy bracelets on etsy..We’ll figure it out, I know we will. No matter what it takes, we’ll be free. Just you and me...happy, together.”

There’s an unwavering fondness in Trini’s hazel eyes that meet Kim’s own, and her voice becomes a whisper. “You...make me really happy, Kimmy…”

“Me, too..” Kim says, breathing out the butterflies trapped in her stomach. She shuffles a little on the grass, and they’re somehow closer to each other now. There’s a heavy thudding in Kim’s chest as she looks at the girl in front of her. It had been a couple years since Trini had come to the orphanage, and Kim never would have imagined they’d get this close-quite literally in this situation. It’s a fuzzy feeling she can’t describe when she looks at her friend. All she knows is that when she wakes up in the morning, she can’t wait to see that yellow hat in the halls.

And sometimes, she’ll wake up with all the covers disappeared, swaddled around Trini like a chrysalis. Her heart pounds then, too, and though she’ll never admit it, she’ll listen to her breathing; calm and safe. She’ll watch the way her shoulders subtle rise and fall with her breath, and in those quiet early moments, Kim believes she can stay for just a little while longer. She can stay, for her.

“I’m…” Kim begins, lips parted slightly as she mulls over the words to say. “I like...being with you. It’s like everything feels...nice. Like...I’m made of feathers. ….Like a pterodactyl.”

“Dinosaurs don’t have feathers, Kim..” she teases, but there’s still a gentle softness to her voice.

“Tell that to science.” She refutes, and they both give a quiet chuckle of amusement.

Their chuckle fades back into silent appreciation as the stars no longer become their fascination. Their breaths are soft and controlled, and both girls examine each other’s faces in the moonlight, neither knowing exactly why.

“Kim…” The smaller girl says, fondly eyeing the mole by the corner of the older girls lips. “I..don’t think I’ve ever met someone so...so…” she trails off, none of the words seeming right. “I don’t-know why…I probably sound really dumb right now..” Kim makes that bold move again; inches her hand towards Trini’s and slowly intertwines their fingers. Everything about it is perfect. It’s like their hands are made to hold each other’s, and Trini’s cheeks are painted vibrantly. 

“I think you’re pretty amazing too, Trini...You’re the best friend I could ever ask for...”

Their gazes never leave one another, and Kim’s eyes drift to the girl’s pouty lips. She wonders why they look so nice, why they’re so cute-why Trini’s so cute. She wonders...just how soft they are...and what would it be like if she just...just…

Their faces are drawing closer to each other without either of them truly realizing it. Their fingers squeeze tighter around each others, and the world seems so distant. Kim’s eyes close in anticipation, waiting for something that is undefined, but will no doubt make perfect sense. Trini bumps their foreheads together, and the expectation of whatever it was, feels missed. Trini sighs contently, and Kim opens her eyes. She’s simply resting there, a peaceful smile on her face.  It’s strange, all the feelings Kim has in that moment. She’s a little scared, a little disappointed, and very confused...but...she’s also incredibly happy. Her hero, her knight, her best friend...she is the only good Kim has known in a long time, and Kim reaffirms her vow. 

“I’m never gonna let you go, Trini…”

She can tell the brunette is beginning to drift off to sleep, and worries that maybe she didn’t hear her. She opens her mouth to say it once more, but Trini’s smile grows wider as her eyes close. “I’m never gonna let you go either, Kim...never ever…” She sighs once more, and nuzzles into Kim’s shoulder. “You’re….the best thing in my life, Kim….the most...special thing..”

Trini’s asleep now, and Kim has no idea what to do. She wants to tell her not to go to sleep just yet. She wants to talk to her some more, tell her more, but Kim isn’t sure what it is that she would say. And she wouldn’t dare disturb the moment. So she smiles, hugs her treasure closer, and lets Trini’s words replay in her head over and over until she too, falls into the most peaceful dream she’s had in years.

                    -------------------------------

“Detective Hart, I’d like to introduce you to Jason Scott.”

She looks to the man next to the sergeant. He’s clean cut, blonde curls swooped neatly to the side. His eyes are a beautiful sky blue, and his strong jaw is relaxed as he’s introduced.

“He’s a transfer from up north, and he’s going to be your new partner from now on.”

Kim’s eyebrows raise, then furrow. “What about Zack? Why am I suddenly getting a new partner?”

She knows the answer. She knows it very well, but the question still escaped her. “ Detective Scott will no doubt be a better fit for you. He’s the best from his division and I have no doubt that he’ll be an invaluable asset to this case.”

And by that, he means that Jason’s going to be keeping an eye on her in case she decides to get homicidal. He thinks Zack will let things slide if she is convicted, and Kim comes to the conclusion that by having an outside party come in, there won’t be such a conflict of interests. It’s subtle, but there’s no mistaking that Kimberly is truly under the microscope now.

But she gives a courtesy smile, toning it down so that they won’t get suspicious, and shakes Jason’s hand. “It’ll take some getting used to, but I look forward to working with you. Hope you can keep up with me.” It’s meant to sound playful, but both Detective Scott and the sergeant mentally take note of that last line.

Just how much does this Jason guy know? Is he aware that the department is suspecting Kimberly of murder right now? He must be. However, Jason smiles and shakes her hand back, and boyish smile on his face. “Same here, Detective. Let’s catch this sucker, yeah?”

Kim nods and agrees, but she knows nothing at this point is going to be easy. 

The day goes on, and as Kimberly goes throughout her usual business day, she swears Jason is watching her. No matter where she goes, she can feel his blue eyes on her back. But she can’t jump to any conclusions, not yet. She’s not doing anything wrong, so why should she be so nervous? She sits with Zack at his desk at lunch, finding her appetite isn’t what it should be.

“So, what about that Scott guy?” He asks through a mouthful of club sandwich, gesturing to the transfer sitting at the other end of the room. “What do you think of him?”

Kim messes with the wrapper of her own sandwich and hums. “He seems nice enough, but..” she glances at her new partner from the corner of her eye, notices that Jason is doing the same. They both turn their gazes away. “Kinda weirds me out.” she whispers.

Zack gives an understanding nod and chews. “Gotta admit, he’s pretty hot though.” Kim laughs and shakes her head.

“Yeah, I guess. I bet you anything he played football in highschool and was famous there.”

“Weren’t you a cheerleader though?” Zack teases. “If you’re right, then you two wouldn’t be so different.”

Kim’s laughter fades, and she stares down at her sandwich which hasn’t even a bite taken out of it, then discards it into the trash. Zack’s not entirely wrong.

                        ----------------

“So I hear Ty has a crush on you..” A    manda Clarke says, reapplying her makeup in the women’s restroom. “He’s pretty cute, don’t you think?”

Kim does the same, adjusting her eyeliner and blinking a few times and double checking that the lines are even. “Sure.”

Amanda scoffs and looks at her. “ That’s it? He’s on the football team and one of the most popular guys in school and all you can say is ‘sure’?”

“Yeah, I like him, but midterms are coming up and-” Amanda is pushing her against the wall, and Kim’s staring at her in bewilderment. 

“You’re head cheerleader, Kim! A hot, badass bitch! You dating Ty will put you like, on the very top of the food chain! You dumb ho, you just don’t pass up an opportunity like this!”

Amanda has a wild smile on her face, and Kim stares at her...acquaintance...as she thinks it over. When highschool started, Kim was absolutely mortified. She had watched all the shitty teen movies ten times each, and while none of it seemed glamorous by the end of any of them, she knew that being a teenager would define who she would be later, and Kim was determined not to be alone anymore.

It was easy enough. Flirt a little here and there, do her hair, paint her face every morning-she’s been doing that part for years, now. The cheerleaders came in one setting, and one setting only: bitchy and proud of it. Always surrounded by groups of friends and admirers, everyone wanting them or wanting to _be_ them.

_Just look at me…I don’t want to be alone again…Please, just look at me.._

Before she knew it, she was high school royalty. Everyone was talking about her, in no time.  Gossiping, or praising, the halls were bouncing with Kim’s name. It was familiar, but this time, Kim was more equipt for it. At least a little. She was always surrounded by people-cheerleaders, groupies, whoever else- and while she was never alone in the physical sense...there was still a deep ache inside her chest that never went away. Never stopped, and was never filled.

She’s never had a boyfriend before. Boyfriends mean a close connection different from all others, right? Having a boyfriend meant that she would be loved, right…? If having a boyfriend means that hole inside her can be filled….then maybe she should give it a shot. 

“You’re right.” she tells Amanda. “No more excuses, I’m gonna go ask Ty out tonight.”

“There we go, Kimmy!” she praises. “You two are gonna have such cute babies.”

Kim mentally winces, but she smiles anyway, checks her makeup one last time, then exits the bathroom as Amanda yells something about getting all the details.

                        -----------

Dating Ty isn’t what she thought it would be. Of course, he’s eager to go out with her. And they go on one date to McDonalds as he not-so-subtly mentions how much he wants to sleep with her. She ignores him, attempts to make conversation, attempts to establish that special connection she craves so much...but Ty is little more than a chunk of semi-sentient meat. 

The school eats their relationship up. They’re big news, and when they walk through the halls, Ty throws his arm around Kim’s shoulder like he’s a game hunter and he’s just caught a new prize to hang on his wall. And yet, Kim smiles. Kisses his cheek and doodles his name on her notebook like any other lovestruck teen would do. That’s what love is, right? 

Dating Ty is absent conversations and too-wet kisses against Kim’s locker during passing period. It’s going to parties and getting absolutely trashed as Ty hits on another girl across the room. It’s ass squeezes in public areas, cocky smirks, and foul breath.

He wants her. He’s made it obvious from the beginning, but Kim always makes an excuse. “I have cheer practice.” “I have to study.” “I’m on my period.” “I think I developed a flesh eating disease.”

And she receives the same answer each time; “But you love me, right?”

Well? Does she? Love is supposed to be excitement, and waiting day and night to see that special person once again even if you just saw them yesterday. It’s...actually _wanting_ to spend time with them. Love is...love is….

An image of hazel eyes and brunette braids flash through her mind, and Kim has to shake her head to get rid of it. Why now? Why was she thinking of _her_? Her childhood friend is gone...and now, she has a boyfriend to think about. That’s all she needs to do. 

Ty asks why she’s zoning out, waves his hand in front of her face, before she’s grabbing Ty by the collar of his shirt and pulling him into the bathrooms. He’s startled at first, but then his hands are fumbling to remove her shirt and he roughly pins her against one of the sinks. He gives up on trying to unclasp her bra, and frustratedly pushes it up over her breasts and yanks her skirt down. 

The lights are bright in Kim’s eyes and she can feel her body growing numb by the second. When Ty moves in her, she feels nothing. The pressure in her chest only increases and she wraps her arms around Ty’s back, balling her fists into his shirt as she presses her face into his shoulder. His grunts are distorted into a distant ringing in her ears, and she goes limp against him, unable to stop the tears that fall from her eyes.

                        ----------------------

“I’m gonna miss having you as a partner, though.” Zack says. His voice lowers , and he takes on a more serious tone. “But more importantly, I know you’ve got nothing to do with that guy.” Kim’s attention snaps back into focus. “They’re crazy to think you had anything to do with it. There’s not a ton of evidence for anything yet, but just because you knew the guy doesn’t mean you killed him.”

Kim sighs, and she’s genuinely grateful for her ex partner. “Thanks Zack...I really appreciate it.”

That wry smirk is back on his face again. “Guess this means we won’t be hitting up the clubs for a while, huh?”

Kim side eyes Jason again and hums quietly. “No, I don’t think so.”

The sergeant’s door slams open and everyone stands to attention. “We’ve got three new bodies by the pier.” He points to the officers needed as he says them. “Carter, Jones, Scott, Hart, you’re coming with me to the scene.”

“Wait, you want me to come?” she asks incredulously.”

The sergeant only nods. “Yes, now everyone get ready and head over to the location now!”

Jason and Kimberly eye each other as everyone scrambles to leave the building. “We take my car.” He tells her, and Kimberly scoffs. 

“Something wrong with mine?”

“Is this a big deal to you or something? My car is closer, and we’ve got to go.”

“No, no, by all means, go ahead. We’ll take your car.”

Jason looks at her incredulously and shakes his head, leading her to his vehicle. The drive is tense and silent as they trail the patrol cars up ahead. It takes them around ten minutes before they get to the designated police tape, and Kimberly whips on her sunglasses to battle the harsh summer light. She and Jason exit the car, and make entry onto the scene. They carefully wade down the rocky cliffside until they reach the bottom of the sandy beaches below.

“Dear god…” Jason says as they come across the bodies, and Kim spots Billy taking pictures of the scene as usual.

It’s nothing like Jimmy. Whereas his was an obvious murder site, this seems more like a dump. Billy spots them, and greets briefly, returning back to his examinations.

“A dumping ground?” Kim asks for clarification, and Jason nods.

“Seems like it. What have you found so far, uh…”

“Cranston. Billy Cranston.” the forensics specialists says. “ Dirt under all their fingernails, I’ve collected some samples already to see if we can find anything else.”

Kim crouches next to one of the bodies and peeks over her sunglasses. “Rope burns?” she says, using a gloved hand to lift the arm. 

“Yeah, it looks like they’ve been tied up for a while.” Billy adds, going back through the photos on his camera.

“But these guys are..like super buff.” Jason says. “Whoever got to them must be equally as strong or as big. But why these guys.?”

Kim spots a dark tattoo on the victim’s bicep; a coiled snake wrapped around a blade over a background of an eye. She hums and makes her way to the other two bodies, and finds matching tattoos on the back of one’s hand, and on the right side of the other’s neck. “ Matching tattoos.” she says. “A gang. Maybe a crime ring? Billy, you’ve got pictures of these, right?”

Billy nods and makes his way over to her. “Yes, I’ve already sent them back to base to look for a match. If they find anything, we’ll know soon.”

“They’ve been beaten.” Jason says. “Probably gang violence, like Kim said.”

Kim turns a victim’s head to the side, and squints. “Bullet wounds. An execution.”

Jason does the same to the other two. “Same here.”

“Clean entry and exit points, too.” Billy adds, half clicking the shutter button of his camera repeatedly in anticipation. 

Kim stands and looks to both of her colleagues. “So if they’ve been tied up-who knows how long-beaten, and then shot in the head...you think maybe someone was trying to get information out of them?”

“It’s possible.” Jason says, glancing over the bodies. “Once we get the information on those tattoos back, we’ll probably be able to confirm if this was a gang thing or not.”

“Maybe. And let us know if anything comes up in their DNA search, Billy.”

“Can do!” He says enthusiastically. “I’ll do my best!”

                    ------------------------

“Negative. The tattoos found on the victims can’t be matched to any local gangs.” Jason tells her, shuffling through the case file.

“And outside the city? Any matches there? Can we ID any of the men?” she asks.

“Nothing. They don’t show up on any records or databases, fingerprints have been burnt off.”

Kim clicks her tongue in frustration, then folds her arms across her chest. “So then it’s probably an underground crime ring, like I said. Real shady stuff”

“Maybe.”

“ ‘Maybe’?” Kim scoffs. “It makes sense, doesn’t it? Billy says that they’ve been kept captive for a few days by the rope burns, and the single bullet wounds in their heads? Someone was trying to get them to spill their guts.”

“You could be right, Kim, but right now we don’t know where to look. If this is a crime ring, they’re good enough to stay hidden.”

“And we’re good enough to find them.” she says confidently.

“Let’s say you’re completely right about the crime ring. Who would want information from them? What would they do with it?”

Kim thinks for a moment, sitting on the edge of her desk as she locks eyes with Jason. “Crime is all interconnected. If there’s one ring, there’s another. They’re probably trying to snuff each other out to be at the top and get control.” 

Jason sighs through his nose, and presses his knuckles to his lips. “Now you’ve got me...But if there is more than one crime ring involved, we need more clues to actually get anywhere.”

“So we crack down on the drug dealers, investigate old members of drug rings, cartels..anyone we can.”

“That’s going to take forever, Kim, and who knows if we’ll get any good info?”

Kim leans forward and smiles. “It’s just like highschool. Groupies know everything about the popular kids.”

Jason half smiles and shakes his head. “I bet you were a cheerleader, huh?”

“Maybe..” she says with a smirk, and Jason chuckles.

“Interesting. I was a quarterback.”

Yup...just like highschool.

                        ---------------------

The blood drips like a leaky faucet onto the concrete floor below, pooling and creating a glassy puddle beneath her. Kim opens her eyes and sees her wide eyed reflection in the crimson, and looks to the murky figure mirrored to the left of her. She snaps her head up and finds Jimmy, suspended in the air as he was at the crime scene, eyes rolled back into his head as the blood bubbles in his throat and pops, splattering onto Kim’s face. Kimberly screams and thrashes around, finding herself suspended from the rafters in the same way. The ropes swing with her momentum and she panics as her body collides with Jimmy’s. His body rocks from the collision, and the rope keeping him in the air snaps, sending him crashing down into the pool of blood underneath him, splattering upwards more than it should and coating Kim once again in his fluids. She cries as she struggles against her bindings, unable to tear her eyes away from the body as she sways through the air.

A figure steps out from the shadows. They’re cloaked, with a flat black mask that hides their features. They stop and look down at Jimmy’s body disappointedly, lift up their shoes and examine the stains on the bottom before slowly raising their head to Kim. They make their way over, and reach out to stop her from swinging. Kim’s breathing is heavy and fear-stricken as she pleads with the masked figure. “Please don’t, please don’t kill me…” she begs, like a child, and the hooded figure gives her tentative head tilt.

She thinks it’s over, thinks she’s made it out alive, before the figure whips out a serrated knife and plunges it straight towards her face.

Kim wakes up with a jolt, gasping as if all the air in her lungs had been squeezed from her body. The night is hot and sticky, and she pants as her entire body shakes from the nightmare. She looks around the room, realizing it was nothing more than a dream. But her heart still races in her chest, and the burning tears are welling up in her eyes as her hand flies to her throat and pulls away. No blood. Good. She lets out a strained laugh of relief, but it opens room for her to sob freely. She hiccups and curls her fingers into her hair. She inhales deeply and lets out a shaky breath, trying to calm herself down. But it’s not enough on her own. She looks to her pillow and reaches out to it, hesitates, before she gives in and tosses it aside. 

Her eyes blink away the overwhelming tears, and she slowly picks up the faded yellow baseball hat, clutching it to her chest and lies back down, feeling like that lost child once more.


	4. Silhouette

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long, guys! Life and the sads takes a lot out of you and I had a little trouble finding the motivation to write. Not the best chapter, but I'll try harder next one!

She doesn’t sleep. No, not for a while. The nightmare is still playing behind her eyelids when she blinks, and she can’t help but hold on to the yellow hat; faded, and still carrying the scent of soil and something so entirely _Trini_. 

“Where did you go?” she sobs into the fabric. “Why did you leave me?” Kim takes in a shaky breath between sobs, and with each flutter of her eyelids, she sees the hooded figure. She sees Jimmy’s body, and there’s something scraping against the walls of her stomach akin to obsession. She has to solve this case. It’ll give her a piece of mind, and maybe she can clear her head as well as her name. 

It’s a mistake. It’s stupid, and if anyone finds her, it’ll solidify her as the prime suspect in Jimmy’s murder. But she has to know. She has to know for her own sake. There has to be something they’ve missed the first time. There’s got to be something to give the real culprit away. No crime is perfect, and the killer has to have slipped up somewhere. Kim has to find it. She has to revisit the crime scene.

The streets are pretty bare tonight. Kim is tempted to race through the hallowed streets, but the darkened windows peer down at her as if those yellow eyes will open at any moment to condemn her. Kim drives slowly, eyes watching all directions for followers. She looks suspicious, heading down the semi familiar road to the sealed off building, but right now, she needs answers. And it’s about time she got at least a few. 

Kim’s car parks down the street, away from the spotlights, and slowly exits the car, popping her jacket collar to brace against the cold. It’s dark enough tonight, and Kim hopes it’s enough to keep her concealed. Down the sidewalk she treads, boots succeeding to be silent in her footsteps. Her eyes are trained ahead, though her trembling breath solidifies in the crisp air. Twelve feet. Seven Feet. Four. There. 

The alleyway distorts, bending time itself in the darkness, expanding and beckoning the young detective to listen to its whisper of secrets. She braces her gloved hand against the chipped brick and sucks in a deep breath to steel her nerves. There’s a part of her-a small part- that creates a pool of fear within her chest as she gazes into the alley. 

_What will you find?_ her mind asks itself. _will you find clues? Or will you find yourself?_

Kim swallows the lump in her throat and takes a step into the concrete alley. Slowly, she makes her way down, her footsteps and racing heart seeming impossibly loud in her ears. The beaten door is moments away from her, and as her gloved fingers reach for the handle, a shuffling from inside causes her to recoil. A pair of boots squeaking along the tile in the back room of the building, faint and yet so present. 

Kim clutches her hand to her chest and flattens herself against the wall as silently as possible. Her eyes are wide with fear and intrigue as she acknowledges the possibility of the murderer paying a revisit to their own crime. The building had been sealed off to public as per usual, and unless it were some burglar, the chances of the presence being the murderer seemed like a pretty good chance in Kim’s mind. Nevertheless, she had to see for herself. Murderer or petty burglar, Kim had to intervene. 

She takes another silent breath and turns her head to the door. Her hand inches to the handle slowly, still keeping her body against the wall. When her fingers press down lightly on the metal, a low click resounds, and the shuffling inside stops. Kim yanks her hand away and waits with bated breath until the shuffling resumes and appears to fade to the opposite end of the room. No more waiting. She has to see.

Kimberly turns the handle gently and pushes the door open as quietly as possible until she can see through the crack she’s created. Her eyes flicker around the limited field of view she has, until they land on the culprit. They’re looking around at the rafters, a long black coat draping over their body that ends at their plastic wrapped combat boots. They gaze at the area where Jimmy hang, and as if the body were still there, they reach out with their gloved hands, colored dark that transitions into a faded yellow on the palms and fingers. Their fingers curl at something not there, then retract slowly close to their chest. The figure moves, and as they squat  down next to the dried stain of blood, Kim is able to see their helmet. The mask is flat, and dark with gold embellishments that snake from the jaw, over the cheekbones and where the eyes would be, ending the top of the mask. It appears to be made of some sort of glass or other similar material, tinted, too dark for Kim to see any features underneath, but no doubt the figure can see well from the other side. 

Their hands tentatively touch the stain, and they stagger backwards on their knees, touching that same hand to their temple as if they just had a minor migraine. Kim watches them curiously, trying to analyse their movements, and raking over the complications in her head. She should make a move. Call for backup. Do… _something_. But her body becomes unable to move as the figure’s head snaps up and notices the door ajar. _Shit._

She’s about to make herself known, is about to announce her position and authority, but the figure is barrelling across the room and into the door. Kim jumps back and the figure descends upon her, striking out with mighty fists that leave Kim barely any room to breathe or react. She plays the defensive as the attacker attempts to back her against the wall. Kim manages to catch the arm mid punch and spins under it to pull it behind their back.

“Stop resisting! You’re under arrest for-agh!” The culprit slams their elbow hard into the side of Kim’s face, and wrests themselves free from her grasp. 

It’s a quick series of blows that has Kim dazed and falling on her back. The attacker’s weight is on her, and as her eyes clear the floaters away , they spot a jagged blade raise above her face. She lets out a silent gasp and clasps the hand in her own, struggling against the figure’s surprising strength to push the blade back. She grits her teeth and hears her opponent grunt under the exertion. They lean forward for more leverage and KIm’s muscles tense as the point of the blade is centimeters away from the flesh of her neck. She peers into the void of the mask, and her eyes narrow at the insatiable curiosity to see behind it. It’s a brash decision, but if she even gets the chance to escape with her life, she may as well know who this fucker is. 

Kim fights with one hand, barely keeping the blade away as her other hand fumbles around for anything of use beside her. Her fingers curl around what she assumes is a stray brick, and as she takes hold of it, lets out a fearsome yell as she smashes it into the helmet. The figure tumbles off her, dropping the blade. Kim scrambles to her feet as the figure is wincing and already rising. And as they stand, the mask crumbles away from the side of the blow, revealing hazel honey irises.

Kim takes a few steps back, memories of similar eyes skipping through her brain. She doesn’t notice the attempted advance. She doesn’t notice the shouts of someone in the street, or the way the figure glances behind in panic. Kim only comes to as the figure pushes past her towards the fire escape at the end of the alley. She shakes her head to clear the haze, and calls out to the fleeing criminal. Something falls from their pocket, and sensing something missing, the culprit, shielding their face with a hand, doubles back to retrieve their item.

Kim takes off down after them, but the criminal is too quick, climbing onto a dumpster and springing off it onto the fire escape towards the rooftop. She’s about to attempt the same before a voice calls out her name. She freezes in place, and slowly turns to face the new contender in the game.

“Jason, I can explain..” she says, holding her hands up.

“Yeah? Well you better start now.”

                         
                        ----------

Jason puts away is firearm, and Kim makes her way over to him out on the sidewalk. “You really were following me, huh?”

Jason looks almost guilty, but he rolls his shoulders and shrugs it off. “Yeah, I was told to. But I’m not too used to the city, and I lost you at one of the turns. I knew you’d come here, though, I just had to find my way.”

Kim scoffs and folds her arms. “I didn’t kill him. I can promise you that.”

“Then why did you come here, Kim?” It’s not meant to goad her, but rather sounds like a genuine inquiry.

Kim sighs and folds her arms over her chest. “They told you how I knew the guy, right? The victim?” Jason nods. “Well, I...I needed answers. Such a perfect crime..there had to have been something the killer left behind, right?” She doesn’t wait for an answer to a question that doesn’t need one. “And...I had this nightmare...this terrible nightmare that...made me come back here to search for clues. And when I got here, I saw… _someone_ ” She watches Jason’s eyes light up. “I think I found the killer.”

“Wait, wait, you _found_ the killer?” 

“Uh, yeah! What-you didn’t see them?!”

“No!”

“How?! They were like-right there! They beat me up!” Jason makes a dumbfounded shrug with his hands and Kim groans. “You really have the worst timing I swear.”

“What happened? What did they look like? Where did they go?”

Kim rests against the street light and looks at her coworker. “I heard someone inside the building and opened the door a little to see what was happening. They had a black coat and what looked like a motorcycle helmet covering their face.” Jason steps under the light with her. “They were...examining the room. Like they were trying to imagine how it looked when-...when we found Jimmy.”

“So you think they were revisiting?”

“Yeah. Probably.” She tells him. “And...then they saw me. I was attacked, almost killed, but then I smashed their mask and….”

Jason raises a brow. “And…?”

Kim licks her lips, and exhales into the frigid air. “It was only a part of what I broke..and...their eyes...they looked...so similar...to someone I once knew.” Her fingers clutch at her leather jacket as she keeps her eyes to the cracked cement. “I froze, and they got away.”

Jason listens attentively, notices the hurt on Kim’s face, and in that moment, realizes that this girl could never be a killer. “So...the victim was someone you knew…”he says gently, so as not to overwhelm Kim. “Do you think that maybe...the killer was someone you knew, too?”

Kim laughs weakly and hugs herself tighter. “No...that’s not possible. The girl I knew...died a long time ago.”

                    --------------------------

“You’re angry.” Trini says.

Kim turns her back to the girl and pretends to busy herself with scraping the bark off one of the trees. “No.” she says bitterly. “I’m not angry, why would I be angry, Trini?”

The smaller girl rolls her eyes and folds her arms, shifting her weight to one side. “Because you haven’t spoken to me in half a week and whenever I’ve tried to talk to you, you ignore me and make some dumb excuse to leave.”

“Well, maybe I’m just busy. I have other things to do. Not everything has to be about you.” the girl in pink spits.

Trini feels like she got slapped in the face, but all she does is let out a scoff. “I know that. But you don’t have to be a dick about it.”

“If you knew, you wouldn’t be here.”

The younger girl balls her fists up at her sides and inhales deeply, letting it out slowly in a couple breaths to calm herself down. The air is cleared for a brief moment. “Is this about me getting adopted?” Trini asks finally.

She gets no response, and Kim moves on to another tree, stepping away from her friend. The girl follows. “It is, isn’t it?” No answer. Trini clicks her tongue in annoyance. “You’re upset because some family wants to adopt me, right? And that you’re not getting out of here. Right?”  
The silence causes Trini to grit her teeth. “Just say something, Kim! You know I’m right! You don’t have to ignore me!!” Her hand grips Kim’s shoulder gently to get her attention. “Just tell me how you feel! Don’t leave me here in the dark!”

Kim’s shoulders tense, and she whips around on her heels to face Trini, eyes gleaming with emotion. “That’s not it!”

“Oh yeah? Then what is it, Kim? We’ve always been together, and now you’re acting like you want nothing to do with me!”

Kim tugs at her hair in frustration. “That’s not it! That’s not what this is, Trini! I’m happy for you! I’m happy that a nice family wants to adopt you!”

“Then why are you acting so cold?!”

“Because we’ve always been together!!” Kim yells, and Trini’s expression softens as she drops her defensive stance.

“Kim-”

“We’ve always been together, Trini!! You said it yourself!”Kim bunches the hem of her skirt in her anxiety and releases, the bottled up emotions spilling out. “Always, always! I stopped believing we were ever gonna get out of here! But that was alright, I thought! Because we would still be together! Just like always! It’s not about me not getting adopted, or you getting adopted, it’s about you leaving! You’re gonna be somewhere far away, and I’ll never get to see you again! You won’t-we won’t get to grow up together! You’re not gonna be there for my thirteenth birthday, and we’re not gonna get to go to school together and I’m-I’m-You’re going to leave me all alone!”

Kim’s knees shake, and it’s a battle for her to keep what little composure she has left and stay standing. Trini’s eyes are glistening with tears not yet fallen, and she wipes them away before they can escape.  “Oh..” is all she says, her voice cracking. 

“Yeah. …’Oh.’”

“Kim…”Trini begins, taking a half step towards Kim. “I...I don’t wanna leave you either. This family...they seem really nice and...yeah, I’m excited to go, but...I don’t want leave you. I feel really guilty, so I’ve been trying to make our time together last, but…”

“I fucked it up..” Kim finishes.

“No. Well, yeah, a little. But I just didn’t want you to be mad at me..”

Kim sniffles and  wipes her nose with the back of her wrist. “I could never be mad at you..I just want you to be happy…”

“I want you to be happy too…” Trini says softly. She wipes the tears from Kim’s eyes and hugs her gently. She sputters a little as Kim responds with a bear hug, crying freely now. Trini looks down at their shadows as she hugs Kim tighter, lips pursed together to keep her cool. “I’m...leaving tomorrow.” she tells Kim through the girl’s sobs. 

She pulls away and Kim half reaches out to her before she stops herself. Trini is shuffling her feet against the dirt, and Kim controls her tears as the girl gears up to speak.

“You’ve been my best friend, Kim...I never thought I would want to be around someone as much as you, but...When I’m with you, I have the most fun in the world and I never want it to end.” She takes a breather and continues. “You-you mean the world to me…”

Kim’s heart flutters sadly and as Trini dips into another lull, Kim finds its her time to say something. “Trini, I think-I don’t know if this is even right..but...Trini, I l-”

The yellow hat is thrust forward, and Kim doesn’t get the chance to finish. “Here.” the smaller girl says, eyes filled a somber determination. “I want you to keep it.”

Kim’s eyes widen. “Your hat? But you-”

“Keep it.” she says again. “It’s a promise. A promise that we’re gonna meet again some day.”

Kim’s eyes drift from her friend’s face down to the beloved hat, and she tentatively takes hold of it, Trini’s fingers easily letting it go. “This means...so much to me, Trini...I don’t-I don’t know what to say…”

“You don’t have to say anything, ‘long as you keep it safe.”

Kim nods. “I promise.” She cradles the hat softly, and then gasps at a realization. She tucks the hat safetly under her arm and reaches up to remove the butterfly barrette from her hair and drops it into Trini’s palm, closing her fingers around it. “Then you keep this. So you can remember our promise too. And..remember me, too.”

The tiniest of smiles graces Trini’s lips. “How could I forget?”

They both giggle and embrace once again, breathing in each other one last time. “I’m gonna miss you..”

“Me, too, princess.”

They let go of each other and smile brightly once more, before Kim dons the yellow hat and Trini clips the barette into her hair. 

“We’ll see each other again.”

“Without a doubt.”

The following day, she waves goodbye with the rest of the orphanage as Trini peeks out the back window of her new family’s car, caring only about the girl with the yellow hat standing at the front of the crowd. Kim smiles brightly for her, and Trini smiles back, until the orphanage fades from sight, and Trini rests her hand against the glass in longing.

                        ------------------

That night feels more lonely than ever before. She sits in the common room with a few other children as Ms. Holly lazily flips through the channels on the television. Kim rests against the arm of the sofa, not really paying any attention as her mind drifts to Trini. Her eyes begin to drift shut, until a peculiar glimpse on the screen catches her eye. 

“Wait, go back!!” she shouts, sitting up straight as the other children and Ms. Holly look at her.

“Heavens child, what is it?” Ms. Holly asks, and Kim slams her hand on the couch frantically. 

“GO BACK TO THE LAST CHANNEL, PLEASE!!”

Ms. Holly looks baffled, but does as asked, and when she sees what lands on channel five, she lets out a sharp gasp.

“Officers arrived on scene of the accident around six this evening.” The newscaster reads as an overhead image of a crumpled vehicle pans from the news chopper. “An unknown cause sent the vehicle crashing off the side of its mountain path and plummeting to the bottom.” The camera drifts to the tire scuffs on the road and the broken side rail that drops off the cliff. “The vehicle belongs to couple June and Antonio Kwan, who were on their way home from the adoption center with their new daughter, family say. Both parents were found dead on scene, with the child nowhere to be found.”

Kim’s entire body shakes as the news hits her, and she folds in on herself, unable to tear her eyes away from the lying box. 

“The child’s whereabouts are currently unknown, but officers say it is likely that she was ejected from her seat as the back seat belts were all found undone. Chief Monroe admits that it is also unlikely she survived if that were to be the case, but that officers will continue the search until the girl is found. More news to come at-”

The television shuts off, and Kim sees herself reflected in the dark glass, sweat beading on her forehead as she gapes silently at herself, unable to comprehend the tragedy.

“Kim, honey, I’m so sorry..” Ms. Holly says, stepping over to give her a rare hug of comfort. 

There is nothing she feels, but anguish, their promise already broken.

                ------------------------------------------

“I’m sorry, Kim.” Jason tells her. “I can’t imagine what that’s like…”

The young detective is rigid, eyes staring somewhere far away.” It’s fine...It’s in the past…”

Jason rubs the back of his neck. “I won’t tell anyone you were here. But this information-it’s good.”

“Keep it to yourself, okay? Until we know a little more..”

Jason furrows his brows. “What? We can’t just keep stuff like this to ourselves.”

“I’m a prime suspect. Even with this, I have no proof. It’ll only make me look more guilty. “ She stops Jason from going to speak. “You’re assigned to follow me. And even if you make an excuse about finding the killer before coming to me, you’re gonna look suspicious too, and I will be even more so.”

Jason sighs, after giving it some serious thought. “You’re right. So what do we do?”

“We just need a little time…”

“There’s not a lot to go around…” He takes his keys out of his pocket and jingles them. “I can give you a ride back to your place.

Kim shakes her head. “I can’t leave my car here.”

“Right.”

“Go home tonight. Say nothing happened. I’ll do the same.”

“This is getting crazy, Kim...But fine. Try to get some sleep.”

“Yeah, you too.”

Jason nods to her and gives a two finger salute before turning and walking down to his car. Kim waits for him to go out of sight, and lets her eyes land on the glinting metal behind one of the trash cans. She makes her way into the alley and picks up the serrated dagger, sighing to herself before hiding it in her waistband and leaving to head home.

The night whistles on the rooftops, and the hooded figure braces themselves against the air conditioning unit, panting heavily from the adrenaline. They remove their hand from the cracked mask, and open their gloved palm, staring down at the pink butterfly barrette, curling their fingers around it once more and clutching it to their chest tightly.


	5. A Sinner's Shadow

“I’m so glad you finally get to come home with us..!” June, her new mother now, squeals from the passenger seat. “Oh, you’re going to love the house! I’ve been cleaning for weeks and weeks-”

“And she’s still not satisfied with it.” Antonio butts in, and Trini can’t help but laugh.

“Well how could you blame me? This is the most exciting thing to happen to us! Oh we were just so excited and when we saw you-”

“We knew you were the one right away.”

He finishes her sentence again, and Trini has a feeling that it’s common practice. But it’s sort of endearing, she thinks. Married people must have some sort of weird connection like that, right? It almost makes her think about her and K-

“We didn’t paint your room.” June says. “We didn’t know which color you would prefer, and we were kind of hoping...that we could all paint it together.”

“Yeah, that sounds awesome.” Trini replies with a smile.

“What is your favorite color, by the way?” her father asks.

“Pink.” It’s an instantaneous answer, and Trini’s not so sure where it came from. She shrinks back against her seat.

“Really? I wouldn’t have figured that.” June hums.

“B-But yellow would probably look better…”

Antonio glances at her through the rearview mirror. “We can paint the room whatever color you want, kiddo.”

“Yellow...would probably be better.”

Antonio turns his attention back to the road. “Alright, yellow it is.”

“The school down the street is amazing.” June continues. “I have no doubt you’ll fit right in! And if any kids give you any trouble, just let me know and I’ll handle it straight away!”

“Oh, are you the principal?” Trini asks.

“Hm? No, I’m PTA.”

“And a big ol’ mama bear.” her husband snickers.

A gasp escapes June and she lightly smacks his shoulder. “Antonio!”

Her adoptive father laughs heartily, and Trini can’t help but laugh as well. They seem close, and Trini supposes that they rarely fight. That’s good. She has less to worry about. 

“It’s true, isn’t it, my love?”

“I’m just a normal parent. Any mother would react the same way!”

“Yes, but you sometimes take things too far.”

“I do what I must for the greater good.”

“Greater good? What are you, a superhero?”

“I could be.”

“June Kwan: faster than a speeding bullet, impervious to-”

Blindsided. All Trini manages to catch is a pair of antlers and a heavy brown body roll over the hood of the family car. There’s a whistle-like noise from the animal as it careens over the side of the cliff, and June reflexively holds on to the support handle and screams while her father fights to gain control of the wheel. But it’s the wrong way, with too much force, and Trini finds herself screaming as her arms stretch out across the plush seats, bracing herself for the impact.

The metal rail gives way, and the car plummets straight down, catching a jut of stone and flipping over a few times as the sickening crunch of metal and something else resounds in her ears. The car tumbles a few more times, before skidding along the earthy ground, landing upright, although heavily skewed. There’s a draining darkness clouding Trini’s vision, and she has little cognitive strength to begin to process what had happened. Her head spins, and before she knows it, the darkness envelops her.

Her eyes miraculously open. There’s pain radiating throughout her body, and she whimpers as her senses finally return to her. She looks around and weakly calls out for June, for Antonio, but their bodies are crumpled forward, without a single response no matter how many times she calls out to them. The realization comes, and she screams out with a hoarse voice for anyone to save them. It’s little more than a wheeze, but as her consciousness begins to fade once more, her answer comes.

“Poor child…” The voice says. Trini turns her head to the left window and barely makes out the figure of a tall woman with jet black hair and blue-green eyes. “My poor, dear, child….I will save you.”

She breaks the remaining glass with her elbow and leans through the window, unclipping the middle seat belt. Trini begins to slump forward, but the stranger catches her and begins to pull her out of the wreckage. Trini cries out and the woman shushes her soothingly. She finds herself in the woman’s arms, being carried like a child over her shoulder. Nevertheless, she holds on to the woman for fear she’ll fall otherwise.

“No more tears.” The woman says. “You won’t need them any longer.”

It’s getting dark out, and the promise of a new life dies with her adoptive parents. She watches the car blur and get further away, and in a weak motion, Trini raises her fingers to her hair and finds the butterfly barrette still clinging on. She sighs and her arm drops limply. There’s at least one promise she can keep.

                    -----------------------

By the time she makes it down to the streets, her head is beginning to throb. She presses her hand to the side of her helmet and grunts, making her way to the jet black Kawasaki Ninja motorcycle stashed away the next block over. Throwing her leg over the seat, she sighs at the familiarity and revs the engine, the rumble a comforting sound and feeling. The dark skies are a nice cover, and she’s glad that the last of the cars have disappeared on this lonely night. She races through the streets, paying no mind to traffic laws and letting the the crisp air whip past her. Her eyes close dreamily, her driving remaining immaculate, mastering each turn as if she’s crossed them a thousand times. She opens her eyes again, and finds herself at the gated entrance to her family home. The sensor light beeps green, and the gates swing inwards mechanically, allowing access to the property, and its garage.

The motorcycle engine dies in its room, and its owner’s boots hit the marble floor. Brushing her fingers over the gap in the mask one last time, the helmet is removed, and Trini shakes out her hair with a sigh of relief. She sets the helmet down on the worktable, and tenses her shoulders annoyedly when an autotune voice comes from behind her.

“Master Trini, you’ve returned!” 

Trini whips around, a scowl on her face, and the tiny robot realizes its mistake. “Oh! My mistake! Saber, as you are to be called.”

“You know never to use my real name, Alpha.”

“I apologize, it is custom to use one’s given name when addressing them, correct?”

“I told you that in private, but you’re not allowed to use it.”

“Understood. Can I assist you in any way?”

Trini glances at her helmet, and points to it. “Fix it, and make it stronger this time.”

“Right away!” The robot salutes, and eagerly scurries to lift the helmet off its perch. “What happened to it?”

“Ran into something.” she says flatly, and the robot turns it over in its hands inquisitively.

“Just fix it, Alpha. I’m going to bed.”

“Yes, Master Saber.”

The events prior are already starting to blur in her mind. She knows that’s dangerous, but she’s discovered there’s little to be done about it. Trini walks into the main building, and tiredly steps up the stairs, using the rail to guide her. She glances around the extravagant foyer, and at the many decorations and pieces of art that litter the walls. When she gets to the top, just before the stairs split in both directions, Trini gazes up at the larger than life portrait of the woman who saved her.

The painting towers above everything with a cold, condescending glare. Trini winces mentally at it, as she does each day, and feels that this depiction is one of the devil, watching her every move though the spirit has been long gone. Her eyes land to the other figure sharing the canvas, and recognizes it as herself. She stands to the woman’s hip, and her savior’s fingers are gripping her younger self’s shoulder, keeping her chained to the woman’s side. Her past self bears no emotion, and though her present self thought it impossible, a slow hum of sadness fills her chest, and she tears her eyes away from the painting. 

Trini turns right and heads up the stairs to the end of the open hall and pushes open the large double doors to her room. It’s as lavish as the rest of the mansion, yet it lacks any personality. She heads to her walk in closet and opens the secret panel behind one of the racks of clothes. Shouldering off her coat, and hiding away her uniform. Before she removes the last of her outfit, she pulls out the butterfly barrette, passing it between her fingers before stripping off her pants and sealing the sin away. She grabs a fresh silk night slip and pulls it over her head, exits the closet and closes the doors. Sliding the light dimmer down, Trini doesn’t bother to pull back the covers when she approaches her bed, instead lying on top of them unceremoniously.

Trini-or, Saber, as the woman would call her, resigns to the emptiness in her stomach, nestles her face into her pillow, and marvels at the butterfly barrette in her palm. She thumbs it, turns it over, admiring its simplicity. It’s all she has left of her old life, managing to keep it hidden all these years. Rita said forgetting was good, and that she didn’t need to remember the pain that comes with life. She was right, as she always was, and the woman made sure to put her words into practice with Trini.

And despite her past being shrouded in mystery, she knows that this butterfly holds the key to those repressed memories. Her younger self knew of its importance, and in a way, Trini is grateful she went against Rita’s rules just once. This sole butterfly keeps her grounded, after the carnage has subsided. But lately, a pang of hunger will radiate through her body, and the butterfly will flap its wings. 

“Guide me.” She had once told the butterfly. “I am lost, and I don’t know what to do.”

The butterfly flapped its wings and Trini received an answer in the form of a memory.

                    -------------------------

“We just want to play…” The pudgy boy said.

“I don’t care, just leave her alone!!”

The memory is hazy, with a grey vignette around its edges that obscure the rest of the picture. He snickers, and when the first person gaze shifts over, she sees two more figures, shrouded in a black smoke that prevents her from getting any more clues. Even when one of the shadows steps toward her, menacingly, its voice is garbled, and she can only clearly see the pig-nosed boy standing behind the ghost.

A shift in scene. Running. Running as fast as she can through a mangled wood. She checks behind, and the darkness runs for her. Shifting again, she sees the two shadows, then the pudgy boy standing behind them once more.

“Jimmy.” The garbled voice says, and it clicks.

Trini was pulled from the memory as if she had breached water, gasping and struggling to find purchase on something-anything. “Jimmy. Jimmy. Jimmy...Orwell..”

                    -----------------------------

Finding the man was easy. A quick search of the name and a dive into personal records pulled up an image of the man she was looking for. He was no child, but the resemblance between the man and the child she saw were undeniably uncanny. His birthday and current age matches up to how old he must have been in the memory, and Trini knew she had found her guy. But what was it about him that made one of her memories return? Why is this man so important? He didn’t look particularly nice from what she remembers, but...at the moment, he’s all she’s got.

The man’s current occupation was less than glamorous, and Trini scoffs, curling her lip in disgust. “ ‘Kum N’ Go.’ Fantastic.” 

It’s not that she was opposed to those shops, even she became interested in stuff like that once in a while, but the name and..everything just seemed so… _him_. And she didn’t even know the guy! Not really, anyway. Still, she figures she’d pay a visit. For answers. Duh.

And so Trini made her way to the dingy part of town, and peered up at the neon sign of ‘Kum N’ Go’. She winced at the pinup decal in the window, and pushed open the door, the little bell above jingling to notify the owner. But it didn’t seem necessary, as Jimmy was already watching her through the window from the moment she got off her bike. He shuffles to look busy, and Trini mentally rolls her eyes. She ignores him, for now, and pretends to peruse the shelves. 

Many things she recognizes, and many others she does not. She feels a little uncomfortable, just being here, and she’s thankful that no one else seems to be in here with her. Her eyes land on a certain phallic object and her eyes widen. “What the fuck..” She whispers under her breath, backing away from the monstrous...tool. 

“Uh-Can I..help you find anything..?” Jimmy says, clearing his throat.

Oh, good, an excuse to get away from that thing. “Ah, yeah, I think.” she replies, making her way over to the front desk. She acts like she doesn’t notice the way Jimmy eyes her entire body, and instinct has her playing up the part. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, which just falls back into place , short, straight locks charmingly framing her jaw. “I’m...kinda new to this stuff..”

Jimmy swallows thickly, then laughs. “A virgin?”

Very subtle, man, very subtle. But Trini’s embarrassment is real, and she finds herself telling the truth, somewhat. “N-no..I’ve just...never been to a shop like this before..”

“Ah...I see...Looking to spice things up with your boyfriend, then?”

Trini’s nose crinkles, and for some reason that offends her. “No… I don’t have a boyfriend…” This isn’t going anywhere. She needs answers. Has to know more about this guy, find out what he knows. “Do...you...have a girlfriend?”

A wry smirk appears on his face, and Trini thinks that maybe he took that the wrong way. Goddamnit. “Why no...No I don’t…”

He licks his lips, and Trini has to stop herself from vomiting in her mouth. “Interesting...So...you’ve been here a while? In town, I mean?”

Jimmy seems confused at the change of topic, but he goes with it nonetheless. “Yeah, I guess so. Moved to the city once I was 18, liked it, set up shop.”

“Oh? And uh...where are you from?”

He tenses up, then. “Just outside Reno.” He rubs the back of his neck embarrassedly. “Grew up with a lot of other kids, if you know what I mean.”

No, not really. She drums her fingers on the counter and hums. “Did you...know a little girl? Maybe around...eight or nine?”

“Well, yeah, I think so. Probably. Like I said, there were a lot of us.” He narrows his eyes a little. “You...got some business with me..?”

“No, not really. You just..look a little familiar.”

A silence drifts between them. This is not going well at all. If she wants to know anything more...then… “I...I was wondering…” she says, doing her best to sound naive and flirtatious. “If you’d wanna show me how some of these things work…?” She gestures to the row of items behind her with a nod of her head, and Jimmy practically snorts and covers his mouth with his hand. “Answer the question.” she says more firmly, losing her patience.

“Uh-uh..y-yeah...sure...I can close up shop and-”

“No. not now.” He looks confused, and Trini clears her throat, making her voice submissive again. “Tomorrow night. We can meet down the street. I’ve got a place nearby, we won’t be disturbed.”

Jimmy smiles, then. “You got it, babe. He writes down his number on a slip of paper and hands it to her, Trini mentally recoiling when their fingers touch. “Let me know when, and I’ll be there. I’ll pick my favorites.”

She smiles, despite wanting to hurl, and nods. “Sure, I’ll let you know. See ya around.” She leaves with a little wave of her fingers and gets back on the bike, pocketing the paper and gagging. “What the fuck am I doing..?”

When she gets home, crosses that threshold of safety, she doubles over, feeling sick to her stomach. More images race through her mind, and she sees Jimmy. Jimmy, with those two shadows from before. He and the larger shadow are cornering the other once more, and it’s a blur between bodies as the large shadow approaches inwards to her view and Jimmy steps closer to the smaller shadow, whose scribbles of dark sinews pull back from their fingertips, and unravel to show the human flesh underneath. It unravels, from the feet, and reveals the pink sneakers and bits of its outfit, and on its head, a butterfly barrette emerges. The small shadow calls out, feminine sounding, but nothing more comprehensible than the same garbled noises as the other. Jimmy restrains the shadow’s-no, the girl’s wrists, and as the memory disperses, Trini is on her knees, holding her head and yelling in vivid anger, digging her fingers into her scalp as unknown rage pricks across every inch of her skin.

This man, whoever he is to her, is torturing someone else, the one with the barrette. It can’t be herself, whose memories would they be anyway? The bearer of her sacred item is surely lying at the end of her elusive past, and there is no doubt in her mind that she needs to dispel the shadows from her. Her breathing becomes strained, and it’s as if someone else is controlling her body. The sequences in which things happen become distorted, and she hardly remembers gathering various odd materials. She doesn’t remember Alpha’s worried questions, doesn’t remember donning her riding gloves, combat boots, or the long black coat.

It’s heading to fifth avenue in the dead of night, breaking into an abandoned building and covering the entire back room in plastic. It’s setting her tools aside and making sure the place is sealed tight. That, is what she remembers. Trini’s hands shake as she digs her phone from her pocket and punches in the digits on the crumpled paper tucked into the case. She’s agitated , and as the phone rings a few times, she grits her teeth in anticipation. She’s about to hang up and try again, before a tired voice answers.

“Who is this..?”

Relief. Trini’s voice raises an octave, sounding almost too chipper to be normal. “Hey, this is Melissa! Um, the girl you met in your shop today!”

“Melissa? Mm...Oh! I thought...we were supposed to meet tomorrow?”

She paces around. “Oh, I know...But after meeting you today..I...I couldn’t stop thinking about you..” She would gag, if it weren’t for the adrenaline coursing through her. “I know it’s weird, but I...I _need_ you.”

That seems to have woken Jimmy up. “Y-yeah, sure thing, babe. Where did you say your place was again?”

“On fifth avenue, it’s not far from your shop. I’ll send you my exact location.”

“Oh, okay. Well I can swing by the shop real quick an-”

“Skip it. I just. _need. You._ ”

“Um...alright. I’ll meet you soon.”

“Okay, bye.” She drops her phone when she hangs up, fingers tingling and entire body shaking from what she’s about to do. She picks it up and pockets it, making sure everything is prepared. But he can’t arrive soon enough.

Jimmy texts her some while later, sending a picture of the abandoned building, asking incredulously if this was the right place. 

“Yeah, be right out!” Trini’s text reads, and she takes a deep breath before she exits from the side door.

Jimmy’s looking around confusedly, and when he sees Trini, his eyes light up before narrowing in confusion. “What’s with the get up?” He asks, walking into the alley where Trini waits. “    You got something special planned for me?”

“Something like that.” she breathes. And when Jimmy is close enough, she unsheathes a crowbar from her coat and lashes it across Jimmy’s face.

The pudgy man yelps and stumbles to the side, leaving Trini an opening to throw him into the plastic room. Jimmy rolls forward, and looks around the room in fear. “What the- what the fuck is this?!”

“Who is she?!” Trini demands, surging forward and slamming the door behind her. “Who is she?!” she yells again, but before Jimmy even gets the chance to answer, she whips the crowbar against his face once again, blood flying from his mouth and creating little droplets on the plastic.

“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about!” He shouts, raising his hands in surrender, curling up into a ball. The image feels familiar, and it pisses Trini off even more. 

A blow to his stomach. “You DO know!!” she cries, adjusting her double grip on the bar. “A little girl! She wore pink shoes and had a butterfly barrette in her hair!!”

“I don’t know anyone like that!!” 

She strikes his face once more-a few times. “When you were younger!! Someone else was with you!! You were harassing a little girl! Who was she?!”

Jimmy’s eye begins to swell shut and he looks genuinely unaware of her question. He’s beginning to cry, and Trini crinkles her nose in disgust. What a pathetic pig. Jimmy must be repressing something about his past too, but it doesn’t matter whether or not he remembers. The past cannot be rewritten, and Trini is going to get revenge for that little girl.

Trini kneels next to Jimmy and grabs the collar of his shirt. Her eyes are dark, and carry no sympathy. “I know...what you did…” she growls lowly. “And if you won’t give me any answers...Well, you deserve to die anyway.”

“W-w-w-a-ai-”

_**crunch!** _

Jimmy goes limp and falls backwards onto the floor. Trini sighs through her nose and  drops the crowbar, beginning to strip Jimmy of his clothing. “You may have been a fucking bitch, but I guess I’ve got to thank you for building up my resistance to this kind of shit.” She tells her former  caretaker from beyond. “But I still hate your dusty ass.”

She leaves Jimmy in his underwear, refusing to get even a glimpse of anything beneath it. She heads over to her duffel in the corner and takes out the coil of rope and begins to hogtie the unconscious man beneath her. A quick trip into the next room over gains her access to a tall ladder, which she sets up near the center of the room. Now comes the difficult part.  Grabbing the vast excess of rope that extends from Jimmy’s ankles, she swings it around a little like a lasso, flinging it over the rafters until enough hangs over so that it won’t slip back down.

Trini then climbs up the latter and reaches for the dangling rope. She holds on loosely to it, making sure her balance and grip of her boots on the steps is sturdy enough to lift the heavy baggage. Once satisfied, she begins to pull on the rope, her stance staggered for support. And, admittedly, she’s also glad for the extensive training over the past decade that gave her the strength to even attempt this feat despite her small stature. Heavy duty rope does wonders, too. Slowly, Jimmy’s body is hoisted into the air, and once he reaches a suitable height, Trini secures the excess rope around the rafters, double checking it would hold. It won’t forever, so Jimmy had better wake up soon.

When her captive finally opens his eyes, the ladder is gone, and the room is bare once more. Trini wastes no time. “I’m gonna give you one last chance...tell me everything about your childhood.”

Jimmy thrashes around when he sees the blade in his captor’s grip, shouting in fear for her to let him go.

“STOP MOVING!!” she commands, and in an instant, Jimmy stops struggling. Trini only has to stop his body from swaying with the last bit of momentum gently. “You said you grew up with a lot of kids near Reno….What was that place?”

“It was…”he slurs, “an...an orphanage. I-I don’t remember the name.”

Trini scoffs a little, a smile of disbelief on her face. “Bullshit.”

“I swear, I don’t remember…” Jimmy mumbles. “I had a friend...his name...was Jake. We spent...a lot of time together, I don’t remember much else.”

“What was his last name? What was he like? Do you know where he lives?”

Jimmy shakes his head weakly. “Haven’t heard from him in years. He was...we got into a lot of trouble together. He was like...like a brother to me. His last name was Sanderson. I think.”

Trini hums. “Thank you. And...about this;” she says, holding up the barrette. “Do you remember this?”

“I don’t...I really don’t...I’ve told you all I can remember, honest.”

She believes him. A coward,  who gives up the name of his friend no problem,  and has little else to offer outside this room, Jimmy is a gross man who will not be missed. The information isn’t great, but it’s a start. Her memories are slowly coming together, and just like Rita would want, she will bury this part of her past in the dirt. Until she reaches the end,  she will not waver, she will not falter, until she finds the previous bearer of the barrette. 

That night, she kills Jimmy Orwell.

 

Revisiting the crime scene was a mistake, Trini knows this, she almost got caught. Rita would beat her for that. She left a piece of evidence behind, and the cop almost saw her identity. It wouldn't be enough to condemn her from looks by any means,  and she was wearing gloves the entire time, so her fingerprints have no chance of being on the weapon. Still, she was lazy, and she can’t afford to let another slip up happen. She’ll have to be careful next time, but _god_ does she need a drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had a lot of fun writing this chapter! Looking forward to any comments you guys leave!


	6. Flowers For A Funeral

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm so so sorry for not updating in like two months!! I've been in a mood. A moody mood. A mood that feels...moody. But, I found some inspiration to write another chapter, finally, even though it's pretty short! Please bear with me, I fully intend to finish this fic....I'm trying my best! I'll try writing again tomorrow, since I'm pretty sure how to put all the events into words now! Again, I apologize for the wait! Inspiration, I will find you!

Kimberly holds the knife between her two index fingers as she lies down in her bed, watching the city lights glint off the cold metal through her open window. A discreet use of laboratory equipment the previous night pulled absolutely nothing from the attempted murder weapon. She doesn’t care about her own prints on it now, as there’s no way she could turn this in without any backfire. She’ll keep it for now, until she can piece everything together on her own. 

For obvious reasons, she hasn’t been assigned to the case, and her sergeant had instead instructed her to follow the homicide of the three men a few days prior, now codenamed as the “triad” case. But, to be honest, how can she begin to even think about something so trivial as that in comparison to something much more personal? She knows, she knows, it’s unprofessional, and she really should be trying harder. But, Kim knows she’s one of their best detectives in her unit, and she can solve the triad case no problem-if it weren’t for the uneasiness in the pit of her stomach and the winding labyrinth of her mind.

Maybe she had imagined it; those hazel eyes. No, it was merely a coincidence. Plenty of people in the world had similar eyes, didn’t they? Of course. Kim, like always, was just wishing for something that will never be. But, would that really be something she should wish for? The girl she l-her friend, from a long time ago to be a murderer? Kim scoffs at the thought and hides the blade beneath her mattress. 

“Don’t be stupid, Kim.” She tells herself. “You’re just...going through the motions. It’ll pass, just like it always does. You just have to...breathe...and do your best.”

She takes a deep breath, and lets it out slowly. Once, a few more times, trying to lull her heavy heart back to a normal pace. She wants to close her eyes desperately, but they betray her, drifting to the bedside calendar on her nightstand. The clock flickers to a new day, and Kim reaches out, ripping off the previous date from the calendar, sighing internally. The dreaded date is getting unnervingly close, and Kim knows the obsessive tracking of it isn’t healthy, but even through extensive therapy sessions, it’s something she could never kick. Not like it was even possible in the first place. 

Something’s not clicking together, though, in this curious case of hers. Is it all she can do to wait for the killer to strike again? Pray that the victim will be some other poor sap she didn’t kn- no. That’s too dark, she shouldn’t be so morbid. But what else can she do at this point? That dream she had...felt almost too real, and in retrospection, the killer had been wearing an outfit pretty similar to the one her mind had created. Surely, that’s just a coincidence. The murderer probably just shares her generic imagination of what a criminal looks like.

That helmet, and those gloves, though...they look like part of a riding set. Perhaps the suspect owns a motorcycle or some other type of bike. Perhaps that’s something to look into..It may be a stretch, but so far, it’s all she’s got. The triad case can wait. Right now, she just needs to get a couple hours of sleep. Just a few hours of dreamless sleep...if only she were so lucky.

\--------------

Pollen coats the earth, washing it in bright paths of flowing yellow. Spring breezes shake the trees, sending its gentle, lily-white maidens dancing down. They tentatively land around Kim, and one becomes so bold as to kiss the tip of her nose. Stirred from her Sunday nap, the young detective lifts the petal and looks at it curiously before sitting up and releasing it back into the air with a blown kiss. She smiles, bids farewell to the floral maiden, and soaks in the angelic rays of light that hugs her. It’s a paradise, and there is no reason for her to question anything about it. For who would want to leave paradise? 

The dewy grass stains her white attire, but that’s alright with her. Barefooted, Kim stretches her toes and lets them glide through the dirt like sand. The wind billows through the shirt half tucked into her slacks, the buttons laying open freely midway to her chest. Her nimble fingers begin to pick the flowers around her, and weave them into a floral tiara. Securing the last strand, she beams proudly at her handiwork, and gives it a spin around her index finger. 

And from the corner of her eye, with just the slightest glance upwards, she catches a glint of canary gold. Kimberly stands, the tiara placed with care in her spot. Her guest peeks out from behind the mossy tree, then ducks away upon realizing she’s been spotted.

“It’s alright.” Kim calls to her. “I won’t hurt you.” 

There’s a moment of timid debate before the child steps out from behind the oak and walks over to Kim, yellow dress brushing against the vivid flowers.

“Hi there! I’m Kim. What’s your name?” she asks, crouching down to be on level with her guest, but the child only shakes her head in reply. “Huh? You can trust me. I’m super cool.”

The girl smiles with white teeth, letting out a little laugh. But still, she shakes her head.

Kim smiles back, and shakes her head in amusement. “Okay, okay. That’s fine. You’re not lost, are you?” Another head shake. “Thought so. Hmm…Well, you can hang out here until your parents call you back if you want.”

The child’s smile fades, and her hazel eyes drift downwards, her mood turning somber. There’s nothing to be said. Kim knows. The detective reaches for the tiara, and then fits it to the child’s head. Too large, the tiara slips down a little bit, and both Kim and the visitor giggle. Kim adjusts the headwear, and ruffles the girl’s hair kindly. “There we go! Wow! You look so pretty!”

The little girl’s cheeks flush and she pulls her braids over her face to hide them, which only makes Kim laugh at the innocence. Her small hand paps Kim’s shoulder, and when the woman tilts her head in confusion, the girl pushes against her shoulder once more.

“Tag.” the child says. “Tag. You’re it.”

“Oh! Tag! Okay, sure!”

“Five second head start.”

Kim folds her arms. “Five _**seconds**_. That’s way too long!”

The guest puffs out her cheeks. “It’s fair! You’re big!”

“Hmmm…” Kim hums. “Alright. Five seconds. But that’s all!”

The child bounces on her toes excitedly, and when Kimberly begins counting, she takes off as fast as her little legs can carry her. Like the admirable person she is, Kim waits an extra three seconds before giving a lighthearted chase. It’s just a kid, after all. The guest races through the flower fields, giggling with excited fear as Kim shouts out her warning. 

“I’m right behind you!” she calls, and her playmate lets out a high shriek. Kimberly laughs to herself, keeping herself at a moderate jog. But there’s something up ahead that the child neglects in her frequent glances back at Kim, and when the weight of the realization hits the detective, it might have been too late. “Hey, stop! Stop running!” She screams, but there is too much naivete in this child’s game. The girl laughs, believing to have the upper hand, blissfully unaware of the future. “Stop, please!!”

The girl in yellow turns attention back ahead, and her eyes glisten with a newfound fear. She digs her heels into the dirt, but the momentum forces her forward despite her attempts. Her toes snag on an elevated section of land, and her body spins around as her weight leaves the ground. Kimberly screams, lunging forward with her hand stretched out. If she could extend her hand just a little further….

The child looks to her new friend helplessly, her own hand just barely beginning to reach forward to clasp onto the woman’s hand. Their fingers nearly connect, until a small gasp leaves the girls lungs as she plummets backwards down the meadow’s drop off. Kim’s fingers curl around thin air, and she stops herself before she meets the same end.

Her breath rattles in her lungs as she stares down the chasm, the sound of frail bones crunching still echoing in her ears. Her eyes travel over the spots of burgundy dotted over the boulders until the droplets meet the source. At the bottom, lies Kim’s beloved friend, arms splayed outwards, legs twisted in ways they shouldn’t, yellow dress losing its life.

Kim drops to her knees, rendered completely still in her shock. Her eyes finally bring themselves to squint shut, accompanied by the weakest of whimpers. She filters the world in through her lashes as she slowly adjusts herself to the reality. She faces the chasm once more, gazing upon the body below. In the yellow dress, contorted in a pitiful grace, is a woman with ombre brown locks curled around her head like a pillow, pouty lips parted slightly, giving way to shallow breaths that rise and fall with her ribcage. 

At the bottom of the chasm, hazel eyes gaze back, to the figure kneeling above-to the child in a pink sundress.

\---------------------

A startling thump of her heart bring Trini out of her restless sleep. A flurry of panic washes over her for a brief second, then quiets down when she opens her eyes to familiar surroundings. She licks her lips and swallows dryly, the air of Autumn whistling through the window chipping away at the skin of her lips. She lifts her head from the sticky keys of her laptop, white cursor blinking over a black word document, subtly illuminating the wall map of the neighboring city and numerous red pins tacked to pictures of a blurry person of interest. 

The woman with no past closes the laptop, leaving the room in darkness. It’s suffocating. She leaves the room, locking it for safekeeping, and enters the main hall. Moonlight shines through the stained glass windows, painting the marble tile in abstract colors. She tiptoes over the cold tile, as if the lady of the house were still roaming about. She pauses once she reaches the center carpet, hears the wind whisper her given name. Saber turns, faces the ground staircase, and searches the eyes of the woman immortalized in their family portrait.

“You’re as sloppy as always…” the portrait whispers through the breeze, “It was one of your many faults…”

“I-I can handle it! I’m almost there, I’m so close!” Saber insists. 

“I told you to leave things be, and no matter what I did to help you forget-forget your _pain_.... your _suffering_...you still try to recall something that no longer exists.”

Saber takes a step forward, clutches the collar of her shirt nervously. “This is my choice! I can’t stand it anymore! I have to know who I am! I have to have something of my own! And not just myself! There’s someone….someone important to me. I feel...like I can’t...just leave her behind.”

The painting’s cold glare is unrelenting. “I have given you everything when you had nothing! Do not forget that it was I who saved your life all those years ago!”

“And now you’re dead! I’m supposed to be free of you now!!” Saber’s teeth clench, and she grips tighter to her shirt. “You’re dead, Rita! You’re dead!!”

The wind dies down, and so does the hissing voice. “Perhaps, my dear child….but so are you.”

The night is quiet, and in that last breath, Trini could have sworn she saw the painting smile.


	7. The Only Reason

By the time Kim gets to the office, eyes bloodshot and heavy, the taskforce she’d been a part of at the start of the Triad case is gathered around Jason’s desk. They’re talking animatedly, and it’s clear that they’ve gotten a hold of something important. This early in the day? Kim can only wonder what it could be. She hopes it’s good news. She walks through the space between desks, on route to the group before her sergeant intercepts her.

“Miss Hart.” He greets flatly. “You look like shit.”

That’s probably true, but Kim wasn’t expecting that in the slightest. She consciously brushes her hair out of her face and holds the strap of her bag. “I just had a rough night of sleep is all.”

The sergeant hums, arms folded behind his back in his ever professional manner. “It would appear to be a common occurence, wouldn’t you say?”

He’s grilling her already. She has to play it safe. “Ah, I’ve just been trying to catch up on paperwork, and y’know, trying to keep my house in order in my free time. Time just escaped from me, I guess.” The sergeant’s gaze is unwavering, absent of any other reaction. “But I’m good, I plan to work hard as always.”

“Interesting that you say that, Miss Hart,” He half turns to the Triad officers and gives a slight nod of his head. “Because Mr. Scott has just found the culprit-or should I say, culprit _s_ in the Triad case.”

Kim straightens her back, and grips the bag tighter. “What? How?!”

“I suppose he’s just working _extra hard_. It’s admirable, really.” Kim can feel the envy scratching at her skin. She’s always been competitive in many regards-it’s just part of her nature, and before all the chaos, she really was their top agent. So she’s slipping a little, but who does this new guy think he is? This can’t be real. “Head on over, they’ll inform you on the details. I want you guys to apprehend these guys before the day is done. Get to it.” He leaves no room for a reply, and Kim blows out hot air through her nose as he leaves.

She looks over to her coworkers, and Jason looks up at her, giving that weird white boy flatline smile with a wave of his hand. She raises her hand, and Jason makes room for her at his desk by shuffling papers around. They greet her as she approaches, and she drops her bag a little too harshly on the desk. 

“Hey.”

“Morning, Kim.” Jason says, an unspoken awkwardness between them. “I think I- I mean, _we_ have clear identification on the murderers.”

“Enlighten me.” She scoffs, turning her back to the group to grab a cup of coffee on the counter behind them. 

Jason spreads out the mugshots of four men despite Kim paying no attention. “Ricardo Fuentes, Adam Henry, Michael Drake, and Abraham Cowl.” Kim sips her coffee, decides it’s too bitter, then adds another sugar packet before she faces the group and leans against the counter. 

“Okay, and?”

“It took awhile, but Jason found a match on the tattoos for these guys-turns out they were part of a gang.” Carter says, scratching the greying scruff of his beard.

“Interesting!” Kim says. “Oh, so it’s exactly like what I said! Wow!”

Jason grunts uncomfortably. “Ah, well, you said it was probably a crime ring...but...this is a gang.”

“Hm, Hm. So what do they do then, Scott?”

Jones answers for him. “Cameras caught them smuggling masses of an unidentified substance at the harbor and unloading them into an unmarked vehicle-get this, with what looked like captives in the back of the truck.”

“So..?”

“Well...turns out they do this stuff often-very discreet, possibly have multiple factions throughout the city.” He continues.

The young detective rolls her eyes. “What you just described is a fucking crimering, Jones.”

“Look, it doesn’t matter what they would call themselves,” Jason says, “These guys are violent, at the top of their group from the looks of it, and if they’re killing their own, the Triad were probably thinking of leaving or ratting them out.”

She waves her hand dismissively. “Right, right. So, new guy, what’s the plan?”

“I got audio feedback from harbor security, and they’re planning to unload another shipment tonight. We’re gonna go down, set up, and apprehend them when their ship draws in.”

“Pretty basic.”

“Well we shouldn’t-”

“Shouldn’t underestimate them. Yeah, I know. I’ll be ready.” The men steal glances to each other, silent gossip passing through them. Having enough, Kimberly grabs her bag, leaves the table, and tosses her cup in the trash. “I’ll be ready.”

Jason pushes out his seat and tails her. “Kim, wait.”

“Following me again, Scott?”

Jason grumbles and pulls her off to the side for privacy. “Kim, we need to talk.”

Kim yanks her arm away and folds them across her chest. “I got the memo, okay? I understand the plan.”

“No, it’s not that.” He discreetly gives the room a once over then lowers her voice to a hushed tone. “It’s about....what you were doing the other night.”

Kim’s eyes widen slightly, and she, too, lowers her voice. “There’s nothing more to say…”

“We still don’t have any leads…” He whispers, “And I don’t think I can just keep quiet about what you saw-if you even did see anything-”

“You still think I’m lying?!”

He hushes her quickly. “Look, you revisited a _crime scene_. In the dead of night. Without telling any of your superiors.”

“I was-”

“You can’t do those things, Kim.” Jason licks his lips and shakes his head. “I already told the sergeant I didn’t see anything suspicious, but he knows something’s not adding up. And...I have to agree with him.”

Kim’s voice goes dark. “So what are you saying, Jason?”

“I’m saying-”

“You don’t have any evidence on me, Jase. And I didn’t do _shit._ You guys are fucking crazy to think I murdered a man I haven’t even heard from in fourteen _years._ So don’t think you can just show up here, throw me under the bus, and frame me for a crime I didn’t commit.” She’s in his face now, and despite his stoic expression, Kim can tell he’s intimidated. Neither breaks their death stares, and after a silent battle, Kim turns on her heels and stalks away, raising her voice for him to hear. “I’m going to catch some _real_ criminals today, Jason. Be ready.”

\------------------------------

She’s dizzy. Her body hurts. It’s hard to tell where she is, with her vision constantly fading and slowly returning. She’s moving, though, in a car, she thinks. She can see the grey roof that dips into clear glass windows. She’s in the back seat. She can’t move. She’s scared. Her head gets barely enough strength to raise and peek at the driver, their form inconsistent and blurry. It’s a woman-that much she can tell. She racks her brain for anything to recall up to this point, and she calls out the nearest memory. “J-June….?”

“Oh? So you’re cognizant enough to speak, child?” No. It can’t be the kind voice from earlier. This is more grating, more unnerving. “You’ve been in and out for about an hour now.”

“W-where are...June and Antonio? M-my n-new parents..?” She winces from the pain and lets her head rest against the cushions again. 

The woman adjusts the rearview mirror to peer at the child in the backseat and then returns the original position. “They’re dead, dear.” 

That’s not comforting...Not in the slightest..Trini’s eyes brim with tears, unable to understand how to process anything. Once moment, she’s leaving her best friend behind, travelling to a new home, and now...now she’s in some strange lady’s car going who knows where. 

“I-I think I need to go to the hospital…” she whines through gritted teeth and salty tears. 

“No. No hospitals. I can fix you.”

“I’m- I’m hurt real bad-a-and..th-the police gotta-gotta know...I’m okay…”

“No hospitals. No police.” the woman says coldly. “We never go there.”

Trini’s fear escalates, and she is sure that she’s going to be murdered. “Please..” she begs, “If-if you’re going to kill me….j-just let me say goodbye to my friend...l-let me say goodbye to Kim…”

The woman laughs- _laughs_ \- at her. A shrill, mocking laughter. “Kill you? No. No, I’m not going to kill you, child...far, far from it.”

She’s not sure her abductor is telling the truth, but there’s not much she can do in this situation. She prays that she’ll live to get the chance to see Kim again. She needs her now more than ever. It’s a fruitless effort for Trini to stay awake any longer. Under a veil of doom, exhaustion pulls her back under it’s blanket.

\-------

When Trini’s eyes finally open again, the woman is opening the back door and lifting her into her arms, appearing as the boogeyman stealing her from her bed. Her legs are numb, and it’s hard for her to breathe. The woman seems not to care much how she’s in pain by the way she drags her from the seat, and Trini wonders if it’s a matter of ‘Oh well, I can’t make this any worse’. But of course, it very, very well could. 

She’s being carried bridal style, and through the fog of the night, she can see the outlines of a towering mansion. She’s admittedly in awe, never before seeing such luxury. She wonders what it’s like inside-no no, don’t be stupid, Trini. You’re probably going to _die here_. Her abductor treads up the marble steps and the security sensor beeps, and the front doors swing open.

“Welcome home, my child…”

_My child_....Is this stranger...claiming her…? If this woman wants a child, then perhaps she really won’t be murdered. But somehow...Trini feels that might be the more terrifying option.

Trini looks around the foyer, taking in the decor and the lavish furnishings. Under other circumstances, she would appreciate it more, but the awe had its time in the sun already.  
She looks to the grand staircase, and screams at a monstrosity scuttling down the steps. Cold steel, mechanical, with headlight bug eyes that dim every few milliseconds in a blinking motion as its disc-shaped head jerks side to side.

“Master Rita!” It calls in a robotic voice. “You’ve returned! And you brought a tiny human!”

“Alpha, run a diagnostic scan on her.” the woman orders, and the robot straightens right away.

“Running diagnostics.” it confirms, and its eyes ‘blink’ a few times before a ray beams over Trini’s body. She stiffens and attempts to stay as still as possible, bracing for any more pain. There is none, and that’s a relief. The scan is over in a second, and the robot’s body wiggles. “Report complete. Multiple broken bones and fractures in her legs and ribs, nonfatal punctured lung-optimal for removal without further injury- Concussion and….” the robot’s head jerks again. “I’m sensing immense trauma in the emotional sense.”

“Physical, only, Alpha. That’s all.” the woman sighs.

“Yes, of course. No further issues. A vehicular accident, I presume?” Trini manages to give a weak nod. “I see. You are very lucky!”

“Prepare the medical bay, Alpha, and make sure she’s running as quickly as possible.”

‘Running?’ What was she, a robot? …..She better not say that out loud, though.

“Straight away, Master Rita!”

The robot scurries off down the hall to the right, and Rita follows. So it’s pretty serious, huh? It’s as close as she’ll get to a hospital, so she has no other choice but to trust this robot to take care of her. Though, thinking about it, he’ll probably be a little more careful and considerate than the woman holding her. Ironically.

Now in the medical bay, Rita sets her down on the cot, and whispers something to Alpha, who in turn tilts his head again. She then turns her attention back to Trini, and the icy blue of her eyes burns. She reaches out her hand to the frightened child and pulls a blood-soaked strand of hair away from her forehead. 

“This is your new home, now.” She states. “In time, you will come to know your place, and my nature. And one day, you will enter the same world as I.” She pulls away and studies her new possession. “You will do as I say, always, and any ounce of defiance, or laziness in complying will end send you right back to this medical ward. Do you understand?”

Trini swallows thickly, and nods, too afraid to speak.

“And what shall I refer her as?” the robot asks, and Rita hums contemplatively. 

She clears more hair from around Trini’s face, and strokes her cheek with the back of her hand, sharp fingernails grazing against bruised skin.

“We will call her…...Saber.”

\-----------------------------

The seagulls cry out to each other, and the crashing of high tide against the harbor sends splashes of salty water onto the concrete. The last traces of sunlight have long since disappeared beneath the grey waves, and the neighboring residents have abandoned their boats. Kim’s police task force bides their time, silently double checking that their weapons are at the ready. Jones mans the binoculars, scanning the area for signs of incoming ships. No one speaks, and the heaviness of the air is almost suffocating. Kim rests her back against one of the crates aboard the docked ship that serves as their hideout, and stares at the cold white floor, mind racing with too many things that it shouldn’t. 

It’s when the night goes black behind the swarm of clouds that their anticipation is met. Jones signals to the group and points out at the freight ship coming into their line of sight. When it draws just close enough to where everyone can make out the details, Jason holds up a photo of the culprits’ own ship and compares the similarities until he concludes an exact match. 

“That’s it.” he tells them, “That’s our ship. Get ready, and wait for my signal.”

Most everyone agrees, but Kim’s mind is elsewhere. She pays no attention to Jason’s words, and instead squints at the ship docking into the harbor. Immediately, she recognizes three of the identified men; Drake, Henry, and Fuentes. They shuffle around the deck, whispering orders to each other and preparing to move some of the cargo off ship. Drake seems to be the one in charge for the most part, and as the other two take sides of a crate, Drake stands off to the side and makes a phone call.

“Where’s Cowl?” Carter asks. “I don’t see him anywhere.”

“He’s coming..” Kimberly answers, mainly to herself. “ Drake’s making a call to him..”

“He’s bringing help.” Jason concludes.

It doesn’t take long before a mover’s truck rounds the corner with dimmed headlights and swerves over the sidewalks haphazardly, pulling up at the end of the dock. 

Jason holds up his hand. “Get ready, wait for my signal.”

Out steps cowl from the driver’s seat. His face is littered with scars, and his frame is impressive-intimidating. He moves around to the back and unlocks the doors. The lampposts provide some improvement to visibility, and as Cowl moves out of the way, about three other men step out of the truck. But there’s something else-someone else- cowering in the back. 

Kim takes a sharp intake of breath as two of the men drag out two civilians, bound and gagged, and throw them over their shoulders.

“It’s an exchange!” Kim hisses to her teammates. Around the hostages’ feet, she notices, are heavy sacks that droop lazily. “Oh shit...They’re gonna throw them overboard!”

That’s enough. If they don’t act now, two more lives will be lost. Kim springs from her hiding place, unholstering her weapon and vaulting over the side of the boat. Jason attempts to pull her back, but the ex-cheerleader is too nimble, too quick. 

“Kim, wait!” He calls, but Kim is already making her way down the end of their dock, keeping low and aiming to maneuver around the truck. “Jones, call for backup! Carter, you’re with me!”

The two men follow pursuit as Jones patches through, and follows a second later behind them. Kim’s almost to the truck, and she stays low as Fuentes and Henry begin loading the back of the truck. She’s made it. At the hood of the truck, she spots her team, stealthing their way over. She meets eyes with Jason, who slowly raises a finger to his lips and gestures with his head to the other side of the vehicle. Pairs of feet shuffle around the back, and suddenly….everything goes quiet. It’s her time to move. She skirts around the side, hugging the wall. She can almost peek around the corner...just a little more….

A sharp rattling pops off, and sparks fly from the other side, missing the young detective by a hair as her face turns the corner. She rolls backwards, and hears the aggravated shouts of the men behind her. Jason and the squad are running out now, shooting at the culprits as their semi-automatic weapons fire back with twice the force.

One of the men from inside the truck approaches from Kim’s blind side, and Jason yells out to her in warning. She manages to dodge out of the way as the butt of a rifle slams into the metal side of the truck. Kim steps out of the way and grabs the man in a chokehold from behind. He struggles in her grasp and fires off a few stray rounds into the air. Carter comes to her aid, wrestling the rifle out of the man’s hands. Kim lets go and takes another step back as Carter knocks out the thug with his own weapon.

Sirens blare in the distance and not a moment later, does a squad of police cars pull onto scene. Zack enters the fray and calls out to the taskforce to make sure they’re alright. During the rounds of fire, Cowl pulls the hostages below deck as Fuentes begins to pull out of the bay. A bullet finds Henry’s chest, and he stumbles backwards, tipping over the side of the boat into the water. 

The rain of fire is descending upon the shore, and Kim watches as everyone takes cover, peeks out and pops off their own bullets. The ship pulls away from the docks. The night is deafening, and there’s something pulling at Kim, screaming at her to do something-not to let anyone else slip away...Drake goes down, whose bullet it was she does not know, but it was an opening. Before she can even process it, her legs are carrying her across the rotting wood, blood pumping and pounding in her ears. 

“Kim, stop!” Zack shouts. “What are you doing?!”

She doesn’t listen. The adrenaline is coursing through her veins, and she feeds it with a greedy determination. The detective takes a running leap, pushing off the edge of the deck with her toes at the last possible seconds, hands stretched out in front of her. This time, she will grab hold. And she does. Right as the ship is about to sail out of reach, her fingers find hold on the back of the boat. Her fingers dig into the rusty metal, and she pulls herself up the side, feet scraping to find purchase. With a grunt of exertion, she hurls herself onto the ship’s dirty floors. She finds Drake beneath her feet, a wound deep in his chest, but alive nonetheless. He seems not to care that she’s there, too preoccupied with the pain and shock. Kim takes his hands and presses them down over the wound. 

“Keep pressure! As much as you can!” She tells him, shedding off her police jacket and adjusting his arms so that the material soaks up the blood.

Drake reaches out to her, grabs hold of her arm, breathing heavily through his nose. His veins are bursting in his neck, and he groans, not knowing entirely what to do. She has no time. 

Kim places his hand back on his chest, pressing down firmly in demonstration. “Keep pressure! I’ll be back for you!”

She doesn’t make it five feet before Cowl’s dusty red hair pokes out from below deck, and the detective dives behind a crate before he sees her. His footsteps are heavy on the metal, and Kim knows she has to be careful. She moves in the opposite direction the way his footsteps are heading, crouching and maneuvering around different crates to avoid his detection. Cowl approaches Drake, and Kimberly can hear the pained garbles of attempted speech from the wounded man. He’s desperate, calling out for help…

A sole gunshot rings through the air, and the murmering stops…

The footsteps circle around again, and Kim readies her weapon, tailing the convict in a game of cat and mouse. But who was what? It was hard to tell. No more footsteps. Kim presses her back against the crate, strains her ears to hear against the howling wind….but hears nothing. 

A loud _**thud!**_ emerges from above, and Kim looks up to see Cowl standing atop the crate directly above her. He lets out deep grunt and crashes down a little too late. Kim’s out of the way again, at the expense of a lost weapon. She’s been lucky so far, but what is she to do without a weapon? Cowl is rising, brows furrowed menacingly, and Kim backs away as quick as she can. A muddy boot slams onto her stomach, and the young detective sputters out a breathless cough. 

“You were way in over your head, little lady..” he drawls, face sticky from the ocean spray. “Don’t worry, the sea takes us all back some day.” He raises the rifle to her face, and Kim laughs weakly in defeat. She lets her head fall back to the floor and sighs, resigning herself to her end. 

_Guess your luck’s run out, huh, Kim..?_ She thinks to herself. _That’s okay...There isn’t anything else left for me, is there?_

A smile graces her face, and she takes a deep breath before relaxing all her muscles. “I’m ready…”

Cowl’s finger itches towards the trigger, and when Kim closes her eyes, her world doesn’t end in a bang, but with a whimper. Or, an empty click more like it. There’s a few more clicks, and when she doesn’t feel a bullet enter her skull, she slowly opens her eyes to see Cowl toss aside his gun in frustration. There’s a droned whirring, and the harsh ray of the police chopper shines down on the deck. Kimberly laughs once again, and Cowl slowly raises his hands behind his head as an officer’s voice booms over the speaker. 

As the waves crash over onto the deck, Kim mocks her own streak of ironic luck. It makes sense that the universe wouldn’t allow her to die just yet. Doesn’t it? But...the more she thinks about it...the more she realizes that the universe may be right this time. Yes...she still has something to accomplish...and the universe knows she has to see everything to fruition. 

It’s all so clear. It’s the reason why everything started in the first place.

Everything is for Trini.


	8. Cremation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter made me sad. But...I like it?

10 P.M, and the lights shut off. 

10:01, and the security system is in full power mode. 

At 10:05, return to your bedroom for the night upon instruction.

From 10:07 to 10:45, feign sleep until Rita comes to check you’re still in bed.

Sleep for half an hour, then at 11:25, Rita comes again. 

11:55, the bed checks stop. Wake up, and retrieve the miniature flashlight hidden in the boards under your mattress. 

11:56, grab the spade taped to the underside of your dresser.

11:58, pass through the halls undetected, avoid Alpha’s spotlights. 

12:04 AM, open the hidden passageway between the walls and make your way to the gardens.

12:20, hide in the tiger lillies as you approach the back wall of the estate.

12:21-12:33, slowly chip away at the concrete.

12:34, and absolutely _**no**_ later than that, return to your bedroom.

The next night, do it all again.

A schedule mentally kept inside Trini’s mind for almost a month, now. Her body reacts on its own, is her own alarm clock. It’s instinct by this point, and after weeks of analyzing Rita’s schedule, Trini was confident in her ability to sneak out undetected. A flaw in Rita’s security leaves a corner of the wall shrouded and darkness, and the security camera’s rotation just barely cuts off before it. It’s the best spot, she’s discovered, and it’s her only chance this far in to escape.

And so, on the 5th night of August, the stolen girl hammers away with a dull spade, careful not to make too much noise. And after a solid month of chipping, the concrete’s layers have been stripped away to a faded white. She can almost break the last bit to create a hole big enough for her body to fit through. A whole month under Rita’s dictatorship, a whole month of being subject to her violent mood swings and an entire _month_ of wading through the rivers of blood soaked into the floors. 

She hammers away, determined to escape. She will be free. She will overcome. And when she is finally free, she will whisk Kim away. 

_Kim._ She wonders how she’s doing. She wonders if she remembers her, still. Does she still have her hat? Has she been adopted? Is she safe? Does she….even know what happened to her?

Trini hardly remembers the day, now. It’s a little terrifying, when she thinks about it. Has anyone found the bodies? Did they search for her at all? Are they still searching? Or...have they given up already…?

She’s just a homeless child. An unknown name in an unknown orphanage. A dumb, silly kid who thought she could actually be free. That’s all she is. She is a lost child, stolen away by a monster. Scavenged, and devoured by the world. Now she’s here, in the middle of absolutely nowhere. A frog in a slowly simmering pot of water, unaware just how quickly it’s being boiled alive. 

But...is this what she deserves? She’s asked herself that before, told herself that she doesn’t deserve it numerous times. Is it really so? Maybe...she does deserve to be trapped here. In a sick way, she’s being punished. By who, or what, it is undecided. The verdict still stands; guilty, for leaving someone behind. 

For in all honesty, she was being selfish for thinking it was okay to abandon Kim. In all truth, having a family was never meant to be. She had defied some fate, miraculously, and fate had come to seek its pound of flesh. If she hadn’t been so selfish, hadn’t gone away, none of this would have happened. If she would have kept her promise with Kim, they’d still be together. Kim. Kim. It’s all for Kim.

Kim. Kim. Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim, _Kim_ , _ **Kim!**_

The wall crumbles. Sweating, trembling, and eyes filmed over with tears, Trini drops the spade. She’s done it. She’s free. She scoops away the rubble in a frenzy, clawing at the dirt that separates her from the outside world. The stolen child dives through the opening, wiggles underneath the taller end, and grips the grass on the other side. 

She pulls herself through, pushes off the ground with her shaky legs, and inhales the air that is suddenly so much clearer. She chokes out a sob of laughter and hugs herself tightly, exhaling her relief into the cold air. No more time to waste. She’s free. Trini takes off running, leaping and shouting quietly into the night with giddiness. Without anywhere to go but forward, she runs, never once looking back to the prison that once contained her. 

_Kim….I’m almost there!_

There’s a deep bark, and when Trini turns her head in accompany to the sound, The ground is pulled out from under her, and sharp teeth grab hold of her pants leg. It pulls her further towards it, and Trini lets out a fearful scream, coming face to face with a ravenous rottweiler. The animal is chained to a tree, but with its sleek black coat, Trini failed to see it in the midst of night. She hits it with all her might, and when she goes to push the dog away, it sinks its teeth into her forearm. Her wail of pain pierces the sound barrier, and as the dog thrashes its head viciously, she feels as if her arm will be torn off. 

A sharp whistle resounds, and immediately, the dog releases and retreats, standing by like a statue. Trini holds her arm and gnashes her teeth together tightly. She writhes on the ground, gasping with screams that won’t come out. In a mirrored image from her spot on the earth, Rita appears, peering down at her with rage-filled eyes.

It’s not long before she’s quite literally dragged back to the manor, and when the doors swing open, Rita tosses her aggressively to the floor. She slams the doors shut, and the armed system beeps. 

“Insolent brat!” she yells, stomping over to where Trini lay on the ground. “I have invited you into my home and you repay me by trying to run away?!”

Trini tries to scramble to her feet and limp away, breath accelerating in her terror, but she is no match for Rita. The lady of the house grabs a fist full of hair and throws her against the west wall, which makes the paintings tremble alongside Trini.

“Do you not appreciate my kindness? My generosity?!” She lifts Trini to her knees and brings a harsh slap across her face. “You were just a pitiful child when I found you! But now, I hold no pity!”

It’s a punch this time, square to her face and with no restriction whatsoever. She cries again, and Rita takes hold of her wounded arm, digging her impossibly sharp nails into the bleeding flesh. 

“You do not _deserve_ my kindness!!” the woman bellows, and then Trini’s face is slammed against the marble floors. Twice more, she falls. And when Rita’s aggression slowly dissipates, she kneels next to the stolen child, and runs her fingers through her hair. “You are a disobedient child…” she coos. “And you do not deserve my kindness….” Trini lets out a whimper, and Rita shushes her softly. “You do not deserve it….but still, I will be kind. You are my child, after all…”

\----------------------------

_Kim,_

_It’s been a while since I last wrote to you. I wonder how you are. I wonder if you still think about me. I think about you all the time. I hope you’re okay. I can’t write much more right now, but I’ll try again soon._

_You’re still my best friend._

_Trini_

_Kim,_

_It’s your birthday soon, isn’t it? You’ll be sixteen. It must be pretty exciting, right? Two more years and you’ll be eighteen! I wonder, have you found a family? I hope they’re good to you. How’s high school? I bet you must be pretty popular. You gotta tell me all about it next time! Promise, okay? I’ll try to write to you again soon._

_You’ll always be my best friend._

_Trini_

_Kim…_

_You’ll never write back to me, will you? I know, it’s not your fault. But sometimes I wish I could get a reply. Are you okay? I’m sorry for being so nosy...and so clingy...I just miss you. I really, really, _really_ miss you. Please….write soon._

_You’re all I have._

_Trini_

_Kim._

_I hardly remember what you look like now. Are you older than me? I’m seventeen. It’s been...a really long time since I wrote to you. I’m sorry. Sometimes I forget to. I’ve been busy. What do you look like? Send me a picture if you can, I want to know. Do you remember what we used to do together? I’m having a bit of trouble on my end._

_I’ll try to remember to write soon._

_Trini._

_Kim?_

_I remembered to write...I know, I’m a few months late...but it’s better than nothing, I guess. Right? Hahaha. ….Kim. We were close, weren’t we? We were...friends, right? Maybe even...best friends. We knew each other, right? You….you existed, right…? Please tell me you’re real….I don’t know what is anymore…_

_Kim, if you’re out there, you have to let me know we were real. I need to have something safe. I can’t remember anything anymore. I just have these letters I can never send. I don’t even know why I still bother. **You’re not even real. You’re not even real, you’re not even real. YOU’RE NOT REAL AND I’VE BEEN WRITING TO MYSELF FOR FIVE YEARS.**_

_I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of that. I think I’m just tired. I’ll try again tomorrow. Please don’t be mad at me._

_Please…_

_Saber_

\--------------------------

Trini enters her bedroom, tosses her jacket onto the floor and kicks off her shoes. She undoes the velcro of her gloves, then flicks on the light switch, straightening her back when she sees Rita standing next to her bed with all the letters she had written strewn on the mattress.

“Rita, I-” 

“Five years worth of letters…” the woman says, skimming one of the papers lazily. “Five years...and I’ve never found any until now.”

“Rita, please, I can explain!”

Rita chuckles and turns the letter face to Trini and taps the smudged ink with her nail. “You truly cared for her, didn’t you?”

Trini goes silent, balls her fists at her sides anxiously, watching Rita’s movements closely.

“What a shame that she never replied...After all those years….” She looks back at the letter again, staring at it as if she were trying to find some deeper meaning or some hidden code. “How selfish of her…”

Trini takes a cautious step forward. “Rita, please…” she half whispers. “They don’t mean anything It’s just a dumb game I played as a kid..” She slowly extends her hand. “I don’t need them anymore...I can go dispose of them.” Her fingers brush the paper, and Rita yanks it away.

“You know she’s no good for you!” the woman yells. “She’s caused you so much pain and suffering! And yet, you still cling on to what poor excuse of a life you had! This! This is your life now, Saber!” She holds the letter high above her head and tears it in two. 

Trini yells in protest and claws at her caretaker for defiling her treasured secret. 

“This is what your letters mean! Nothing!” She backhands Trini, who manages to hold her ground despite the stinging in her cheek. “They. Mean. Nothing.”

The stolen child seethes beneath her tears, and she clutches at the covers beside her for support, knowing full well that any retaliation forward will earn her another trip to the medical bay.

“You _will_ dispose of these papers, Saber. And I will make sure that you do.”

~

Rita throws the last log into the pile, and Trini watches as the pyre devours its feed. Rita sighs and wipes the charcoal dust off her hands, then looks to her captive expectantly. 

“You know what you have to do, Saber.” 

She knows, and it tears her apart. Trini uncovers the shoebox lid, and frowns at the lonely letters stashed inside. She runs her fingers over the pages one last time, saying goodbye to the penpal that never existed, and tosses the box into the flames.

The heat rises high, the fire god sated. It rips into those forsaken prayers, and leaves only ashes as the carcass. Into the night, the embers climb, carrying old memories into the beyond.  
The fire has erased Kimberly Ann Hart. And on that night, amongst the soot and ashes, so too, were the last traces of Trini consumed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S. I had a whole bunch of cool fonts for Trini's letters that looked like they slowly got more scratchy and desperate over time but AO3 DOESNT HAVE FONTS. LET ME USE COOL FONTS.


	9. Old Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry bout the wait! Fam was visiting. We're getting pretty close, aren't we?

“Not only have you disobeyed your team captain, your recklessness could have cost your colleagues, yourself, and the captives’ lives!” 

The sergeant’s voice reverberates throughout his office, a distinct vein pulsing against his temple. His fingernails press firmly into the chipped edges of his desk, another notch for all the times he’s yelled at Kim, and the others-but mostly Kim. Usually, she would roll her eyes and zone out during these one-on-one’s, but this time, she shrinks in her seat, knowing full well that there would be serious consequences this time.

The sergeant sighs and leaves his desk, shutting the blinds to his office to keep away the curious eyes already peeking through the glass. “Kim.” He huffs, rubbing the bridge of his nose in exhaustion. “When you first started here, I knew you were going to be a fine detective.” He makes his way back over. “You had guts, passion-a...such a heavy determination in your blood that I was sure you wouldn’t rest until you had finished absolutely everything.”

Kim keeps her head down, and listens to the anecdote. The sergeant sits on the edge of his desk, and folds his hands in his lap.

“And despite your egoism, your lack of impulse control, and stubbornness, I was more than cooperative in allowing you to rise through the ranks. But how much, is too much?” He gets up again, and walks to the other side of his desk where he absentmindedly examines the towering shelves of files behind him as he speaks. “It has been increasingly obvious to me in these last few weeks that perhaps this line of work isn’t the best fit for you anymore.”

That gets Kim’s attention. Her head snaps up, and her jaw hangs open slightly. She wasn’t expecting _this_ of all things. She knew she had really fucked up this time, but enough to lose her job? Probably. But Kim would have to fight for it. The sergeant was right, after all, in calling her stubborn. “I can handle the job! I-I was the one who brought the triad down! I jumped on that boat! I bought us time!!”

“You got lucky!” The sergeant yells back, pivoting to face her again. “How much longer until that luck runs out, Miss Hart? How much longer until your foolishness gets someone else killed?”

Kim’s lip quirks to the side in agitation, and she lets out a breathy scoff. “Someone _else_? Oh really? Who was the first, _Johnathan_? Because I don’t recall!”

“Do not disrespect me, Hart. You are to call me by my title.” The sergeant hisses lowly.

“Oh, my apologies, Sergeant Dickhead” She snarls, digging her fingernails into her side of the desk now. “I can’t believe you are still on your _**bullshit**_ about me being a murder suspect! I don’t know how you became sergeant with your head so far up your asshole, you can’t see when you’re being a _fucking_ _**idiot**_.”

The sergeant opens his mouth to speak, but Kim raises her finger to silence him. “My turn to talk.” She orders sternly, and her sergeant closes his mouth. “Then you bring in some guy to _stalk me_ , give him superiority over me, and act like he’s the best fucking thing to grace this unit? Blow me, bitch. You can go to hell.”

“Miss, Hart, I-”

“Don’t bother finishing that sentence.” Kim reaches into her blazer and tosses her gun and badge onto her former boss’s desk. “I quit.”

“Miss, Hart!”

She heads to the door, saluting with her middle finger as she makes her exit. The entire department is staring at her, and after a few seconds of an awkward stare-down, they all shuffle to make themselves look busy. The ex-detective shoulders her bag, steels her emotions, and aims for the elevators, her old colleagues parting like the red sea to make way for her. 

Only one voice calls out to her. “Kim! Kim, wait!” Zack signals to her frantically, and pushes past bodies to catch her before she steps into the lift. 

She glances behind at him and sighs softly, too tired to keep up the front with him. “Not now, Zack. I’ll tell you about it later..”

He steps between his friend and the elevator. “I know what happened-it was loud.” Kim frowns. “But I just want to say that I am completely, 100% on your side, Kim.”

She smiles a little bit. “Thanks.”

Zack nods. “You were right to get out of here while you still could. These guys are assholes.” He squeezes her tightly, and lets go before Kim could return the embrace. “You’ll find something else to do, you’ll make it even further there. No matter what you do, okay?”

Kim blinks a few times. “Wow, Zack...that was really sweet.”

“Plus, we’ll get to party more while you’re between jobs.”

“There we go.” Zack snickers and looks to the doors as the elevator arrives, and Kim follows suit, the frown returning to her face. “I better go, now. We’ll catch up sometime.”

“Yeah. Take care out there.”

Kimberly Hart, aimless once more, steps into the lift, and gives a soft wave to the most genuine friend she’s had in a long time. 

“You, too…”

\----------------------------

Old friend. It’s nice to see them again. In a strange, macabre way, it felt good to pull on the taut leather gloves, and don the flowing cloak. It felt much too long, despite the short time that has passed, and now that Trini has a purpose, so does the clothing. Tonight, she will take another life. Tonight, after many nights of surveillance and research, she will take another step forward. Tonight, she will get the final answer.

Trini gives her fingers a good stretch and hums at the squeak the leather gives. Her corkboard is even more cluttered than it was before, with lists and schedules strategically placed next to his picture. She knows his routine, she knows where he goes, when he returns home, and when he falls asleep...She removes his picture from the board and studies it, hearing his youthful laughter echo in her head, followed by the distorted shouts of the mysterious girl. Her fist curls into the photo, crushing it until his face is no longer recognizable. She’s so close to finding her..and regardless of how much her memories lack, she promises to the glitched past that she will take revenge for her.

It’s time.

In the foyer, Alpha presents her with the new and improved helmet. “Master Saber! I have made the upgrades as desired, and guarantee the added durability!”

She takes the helmet without acknowledgement and guides it over her head. It’s perfect. A sinister smile appears on her lips, hidden behind the tinted glass. Now she’s ready. Now, she can let herself slip away entirely. 

The tiny robot in front of her shuffles to the side, headlight eyes dimming halfway. “Forgive me, for saying this...but… for a moment-although I cannot accurately scan your facial features….-you reminded me of Master Rita.” Saber stiffens, and Alpha immediately scuttles further away. “Please disregard my statement!”

The cloaked woman stands sentry, and her fist slowly balls at her side. “Don’t ever...mention her again...or I promise, I will disassemble you.”

“N-noted! Please forgive my mistake!”

The robot clasps its hands together in pleading, but Saber ignores the creature. “Return to your station, and speak no further for the rest of the night.”

The robot nods, and hurries off, obeying its master’s orders. Saber reaches for the entrance’s handle, but stops before her fingers touch the brass knob. She turns halfway, and stares at the oppressive painting atop the staircase. “....I am nothing like you.” She tells the painting, and steps into the night.

\-----------------------

Another shot passes Kim’s lips, molten liquid in her throat that burns just right. This far into the night, she’s surprised she hasn’t blacked out yet. Still, she would rather take the chance than be forced to think about anything right now. She slams the glass to the bar with a clink, and pushes herself off the creaky stool as a fast song comes on. 

She really should apologize to Zack. This is his favorite club, and he would have loved to go out with her. But tonight, she needs to be alone. And what better way to be alone than being surrounded by people? She pushes her way into the center of the dancefloor, the flashing strobe lights bathing her in their multitude of colors. The wordless music rattles her ribcage, and Kim allows herself to be drowned in its domination. 

The ex-detective runs her fingers through her hair, body swaying and following the bass’s pull. She feels a clumsy weight behind her, and leans into the hips of the nameless man who had come to grind on her. That was alright. He has absolutely no idea what he’s doing, but Kim make anything look good. She guides him, grabs his hands and places them on her waist, snakes her arms around his neck and tangles her fingers into his messy hair. He’s intoxicated by her already, eyes glazed over in a lustful haze as a quiet groan escapes his lips. Kim draws her face towards his, then teasingly turns her face away when he leans in for the kiss. He sighs in protest, but instead pulls her closer in favor.

They were always so easy, and none of them knew had to dance. None of them were interesting, or funny, or smart. Sometimes, they weren’t even good looking. But that was okay, this one’s just her type. He’s disposable.

Her eyes close as she slips into a familiar numbness, and her mind blocks out any other stimuli besides the music. This was it. This is what she wanted. It doesn’t last long. She opens her eyes and looks around the room with mild confusion. She looks back to her dance partner. “Did you say something?” She asks, and the man leans his ear closer. 

“WHAT?” he shouts over the music.

Kim shakes her head and resumes dancing. No big deal. It’s better that he doesn’t open his mouth.

But there it was again. She ignores it, convinced it’s just part of the distortion from the speakers. She keeps dancing.

Again, once more, she hears it. Unmistakable this time, and loud in her ears, she hears it again; her name.

She pushes the man away and searches the crowd frantically. “HEY. HEY, WHAT’S GOIN’ ON? WHY’D YOU STOP?” The man shouts, but his voice is lost to Kim. 

“Come find me…” the small voice calls to her, and all at once, the music becomes too loud. “Hurry up, Kim…”

Kimberly spins in a circle, desperate to find the owner. As the room spins with her, she finds her answer. The little girl giggles at her from across the dancefloor and waves, then flees into the throng of patrons.

“Wait, come back!!” Kim pleads. She stumbles through the sea of people, getting jolted around from their movements until she isn’t entirely sure she’s headed in the same direction anymore. The girl’s laughter explodes into the air, and Kim catches her plaited hair duck behind someone else. 

“Hurry up and come find me!” she says again. “You’re losing already!”

“Please, stop!!” Kimberly shouts, and changes directions to follow the disappearing act. “Slow down, please!” It’s so familiar...painfully familiar….and just like always, Kim feels like the girl is just out of her grasp.

“This way, this way! This way, this way!”

“Please, just come back!!”

“I’m right here!”

“Don’t leave me…!!”

“Come find me!”

“TRINI!!!”

 

It’s cold.The blaring music is just a muffled hum now, and Kim only finds her shadow in the yellow sliver of light pouring into the alley. Her bottom lip trembles, and her breath is running ragged.

“Trini…” she whispers to herself in the darkness, just as she has before.

The isolation is deafening, and upon embracing it unwillingly, it is all that she can take. Kim presses her palms to her eyelids and inhales sharply through her teeth, biting back a mournful cry.

“God, what is wrong with me…”

An answer. A terrible, defiling, unwelcome answer. “Kimmy….It’s been so long...it’s so nice to see you again, old friend.”

She had hoped to never hear that voice again.

\---------------------------

It’s the dingy part of the neighborhood. Single story homes with dead grass and cracked sidewalks, poor insulation and missing roof shingles. It’s very fitting. Saber would laugh at the lifestyle, but under slightly different circumstances, she supposes she wouldn’t be too far from it herself. She parks her bike in the dry fields behind the cul-de-sac, and uses the thick fog to hide her arrival. 

A dog jumps at the chain link gate at the side of one house as she passes by, and Saber pauses to watch it with curiosity. The dog bares its teeth and snarls at her through the gaps in the fence, occasionally lunging at the barrier for intimidation. Saber gives her head a tentative tilt, and reaches out to lift the latch. The gate swings inwards, and the beige mutt steps backwards as it does so. It sniffs the open ground before it inquisitively, and takes a cautious step out of its territory, the aggressive front long gone. Saber remains in her spot, and the dog raises its head up to her, staring at her as if it can see behind the mask. She stares back, and that seems to be enough for the dog. It looks down the road, then back to her one last time before sprinting off into the fields. 

There’s something familiar in it all, but Saber gives up on trying to place why. After all, all things desire freedom, don’t they? She’s wasting time now. She has a job to do. Saber makes her way to a soiled red brick home near the end of the ‘sac, and steps over the broken picket fence in the front yard. 

1:27. He should be passed out in bed by now. 

She makes her way up the rickety porch steps, careful not to make too much noise, and examines the lock on the front door. Easy. In her coat, lies a lockpicking set she has become rather fond of. Fitting it into the rusted mechanism, it only takes a couple skilled turns to open the door. 

The house is pitch black. Small, and run down, though with obvious signs of living from the weight indentations on the sofa cushions, and the mass amounts of beer cans and containers of half-eaten food. But that’s too be expected, she supposes. A roach tends to live in filth. 

At the end of the hall waits the master bedroom. He’s definitely there, lying in an alcohol-induced semi-coma. The anticipation bubbles in her fingertips, and Saber’s feet carry her swiftly over the carpet. It will all be over, soon. After she takes Jake Sanderson’s life, it will be the beginning of the end.

She pushes open the door softly, the old hinges creaking disapprovingly. The lump beneath the sheets groans in its sleep and Saber’s heart beats faster as she draws closer. Her hands shake excitedly, and all she can think of in that moment is plunging her knife into the mass below. But that wouldn’t be enough. She has to ask Jake about the girl with the barette. She has to know who she is, and once he tells her, she will bury her blade into his heart.

Her fingers find the covers, and with one fluid motion, she yanks them off the bed and sends them fluttering down to the floor. She raises the dagger above her head for a teasing stab, but nearly drops it when she meets not a freckled, greasy face, but a round, feminine one. Trini thinks she is beautiful, but then the woman is screaming and her eyes are filled with terror.

Saber comes back to her senses, and clasps her hand over the woman’s mouth. _Shit, shit, shit!_ She has the wrong house!! How could she have the wrong house?! The woman struggles to get away, and in her wiggling, rolls over the side of the bed. 

“Jake!! Jake!!!” the woman yells, and for a moment, Saber is mildly relieved. This is the right house, but then...where is Jake? Whos is this woman? No time for thinking. There’s a new obstacle in the way. 

The woman scrambles to her feet as Saber’s knife lodges itself into the nightstand behind her head. She screams again, and dives forward in an attempt to evade further. Saber pulls on the hilt of the blade to remove it, but the jagged edge refuses to budge.

“Help me!! Somebody help me!!!” the stranger wails, and Saber gives up on her weapon. Letting go of the blade, Saber leaps off the bed and tackles the woman before she could make her escape. “Get away from me, you psycho!! Jake!! Jake!!!”

Jake, Jake, Jake. Where is he?! This woman is starting to piss Saber off now with her whiny voice, and if this continues, the cops are bound to show up. 

“ _How pathetic…_ ” Rita’s voice intrudes. “ _All this effort, and you can’t even get the right person!_ ” Her abrasive cackle pierces Saber’s eardrums, and the stolen child squints her eyes shut behind the mask and grits her teeth.

“G-Go away!!” Saber pleads to the voice. “Get out of my head!!”

“ _You’re always so sloppy…_ ” Rita sighs. “ _If it were me, I’d have that boy dead by now. Are you just planning on wasting more time?_ ”

“You’re dead!! You’re dead!!! Get out of my head, get out of my head!! Get out, get out, get out!!”

“ _You’re useless, Saber!! Just forget this all and go home!! Come home to me..._ Forget that stupid girl!”

“You were never home to me!!”

Saber’s hands wrap around the woman’s neck, and the harder she squeezes, the more she feels dizzy herself. The woman claws fruitlessly at Saber’s helmet, and as Rita’s voice escalates in Saber’s head, the woman’s pretty features are replaced with her captor’s.

Rita grins beneath her, her face a pale shade of blue. “My dear, sweet child….no matter how many times you kill me...You will always return home...and I’ll be there...to greet you...just as always…”

Trini’s breath hiccups in her chest, and her entire body shakes from the scream that leaves her lungs. Her hand discovers the bedside lamp, and before her mind can process the action, the base of the light caves Rita’s face in. She grasps the bludgeon with both hands and slams it down repeatedly until not even the barest resemblance of the devil woman remains. When an empty void stares back at her, Trini drops the lamp and pants heavily, her head spinning until the world returns back to normal.

Trini’s anger subsides, and her breath becomes more even again. She looks down at her blood stained clothes and examines them to make sure it was all real. Shakily, she stands, and uses her clear head to pull the knife out of the nightstand with a more steady hand. There’s a presence behind her, and in a panic, she throws the knife through the doorway.

There’s no thud, no last breath of life, no curses of damnation. Trini slowly turns to face the entrance, and finds her blade in a family picture on the hallway wall. Her eyes travel down from her unintended target, and Trini’s posed arm returns to her side.

A forsaken child stares a thousand miles into the empty face of the woman on the floor. She stands not even four feet tall from the ground, baby blue eyes opened to their fullest. The stuffed lion in her arms falls to the carpet, and her voice carries no sound as she mouths a meaningless word.

Trini, too, observes her handiwork, and takes a step back towards the wall.

“You….weren’t supposed to see this…”

\-----------------

She had no choice. There was nothing she could have done, even if she had wanted to. It was quick, and no one had seen her do it. What else could she have done? There was no question about it. She had to do it.

 

The hospital’s mechanical doors slide open, blinding the forsaken child. The white lights hide none of the crimson on her nightgown, nor does it hide the blank stare on her face. She stands immobile, and in a matter of seconds, two nurses rush out into street to scoop her up. They ask her many questions, which none of them she replies to. They beg her to say something-anything-she doesn’t. The forsaken child only stares a thousand miles into the distance, into the fog upon the hill, where a masked figure watches from above. The others don’t see her, but she knows she’s there. The figure nods to the child as the nurses carry her away, and into the night, the figure rides.

After all, she had no choice.


	10. Back To The Beginning

An ice cold shiver runs down Kim’s spine. The air has become sullied with the stench of smoke and sweat, along with that indefinable scent pertaining to _him_ that she could never forget. She feels her chest tighten, and her heartbeat goes into overdrive. 

“Kimmy...I never thought I’d find you here, of all places. Ah, well not ‘here’ here...but you know what I mean.”

His voice is gravelly, matches the cloud of nicotine blowing past his lips. Kim begs herself not to turn around-beseeches herself to sprint the opposite direction and never look back. She wants to hide herself away, but her eyes are moving involuntarily to meet the monster from her past. It must be a dream, or another hallucination. She prays that it is. But as soon as she sees that damned smile, she knows that it is all too real…

“Jake…” 

It’s a weak cry, more so than a greeting, but the freckled man grins with yellowed teeth, and opens his arms out wide. Kimberly’s teeth subtly chatter behind her lips as she identifies his posture and their surroundings. Her body is screaming for her to run, but her brain has already backed itself into a corner. Jake narrows his eyes at her, and slowly drops his arms to his side.

“Oh come on, Kimmy, I don’t think I smell that bad. Don’t I get a hug? I haven’t seen you in….what is it, ten years now?”

Kim’s fingers flex anxiously, and she chokes on the words that cling to her throat. “F-fourteen. It’s been….f-fourteen years.”

“Really? Guess that’s even more reason to celebrate.” He takes a last drag of his cigarette then tosses it to the floor, not bothering to stomp it out. He goes silent as he drinks in Kim’s appearance, and uses dirty fingers to comb his greasy hair back. “Fourteen fucking years have really done you some good. But...guess by the way you’re looking at me, you wouldn’t say the same, would you?”

She knows that tone of voice. It’s trouble. His eyes are deep and sunken in, half lidded and dry. She knows that look. It’s dangerous. It’s incomprehensible to Kim how in the matter of three seconds, she can feel so small. It should be improbable that in the matter of three seconds, years of schooling, therapy, and police academy training amounts to nothing. In three seconds, fourteen years have been reversed.

“You know, I remember when you were this tall.” Jake says, raising his hand to his hips. He glances at the position. “Ha. Funny, you would have been just the perfect height now.”

Kim swallows the lump in her throat, and though she tries to make any movement, her knees tremble and buckle together, forcing her to grab onto the fence behind her for support. “I...I don’t-I don’t-” she sighs frustratedly, and squints her eyes shut tight as the tears well in the corners. “I-don’t-w-want-”

“Stop fucking stuttering. Did you hit your fucking head or something while I was gone?” He curls his upper lip. “Answer me, dumb bitch.”

Kim inhales deeply, and lets out the breath slowly, eyes still shut tight. “You’ve been here the whole time.”

“Huh?” Jake takes the diversion, and he scratches his jaw in contemplation. “No. No, I was only here on business. Speaking of…” He closes in on her, and grips the chain link space right next to her hand as a omniscient smirk. “Guess you never told me you were a fucking cop..”

Kim’s eyes snap open when she feels his body heat practically on top of her own, and she presses herself as far back against the fence as she can. He presses closer to her more roughly, adjusting his hold on the fence with a rattling clank from his aggressive movements. 

“Where do you think you’re going? Ain’t no boat for you to jump onto now, is there?”

“H-how did you-”

“Told ya, I was here on business.” His knee sinks itself between Kim’s thighs, and he grins at the terrified whimper Kim makes. “A little funny, isn’t it? I tried to do the whole cops ‘n robbers thing when we were little, but you were always too much of a tease for it.”

“G-get off of me!”

Freckles laughs and cups Kim’s face with his dominant hand. “Now this I remember. But I do think it’s pretty rude how you never once bothered to call after all these years. I’ve just missed you so much, don’t you know that? Every day I’d sit by the phone and say to myself ‘Oh, how I wish Kim would call~!’” Kim squirms and Jake jerks her head to keep her still beneath him. “Isn’t that sad?! And I’d fucking think about how much you’d have grown….Sometimes, I’d forget you’re a whole fucking adult.”

“Go away!! Go away!! I don’t want to see you!!”

Jake holds both of Kim’s wrists as she fights back against him, scoffing at her futility. “But I just happened to find you here!! You wanted to be a hero, didn’t you? Bet you wanted to feel all important. What have you been doing all these years, Kim? I hope you haven’t been unfaithful to me….”

Kimberly’s cheeks are stained with tear trails, yet she continues to push back against him, eventually gaining some leeway and tearing herself free from the corner-albeit with Jimmy. “Faithful? Faithful?! You made my childhood a living hell!! You took away everything!! I had no chance to have a normal life after what you did you asshole!!” She swings up her knee into Jake’s side, and the man stumbles to the side with a grunt, dragging Kim with him by a fistfull of her hair. 

“You know you liked it, stupid whore!!” Still with a grip on her hair, Jake slams the ex-detective face-first into the dingy alley walls, pushing his weight onto her back and holding her head flat with one hand. “How many guys did you fuck, huh? How many have you deepthroated? I was just practice, wasn’t I? How many, Kim? HOW MANY?!”

Kim grits her teeth as her face hits the cobblestone again, and she turns her head just enough to hock a wad of spit into Jake’s eyes. “Get your fucking hands off me!”

Jake’s neck muscles strain as he clenches his jaw, and Kim can tell he’s attempting to hold himself back. “You’re right. You’re right...I must be wrong.” He hums lowly, and repositions himself to lean close to her ear. “You have a very lovely home…”

Kim stiffens at his last comment, the calamity of the situation striking her fully now. He was there at the harbor, he followed her here. And worse yet...he followed her home. Her mind hides none of the possibilities as she imagines his grimy fingers combing over her belongings. Along the walls, her bedsheets, through her drawers...over her pillow and-

“So many interesting things….but there was one thing-one thing in particular...that made no sense to me. But now...it makes so much goddamn sense!” Part of his weight leaves her, and Kim sees him shuffle around in his pockets for something. 

She can hear her pulsing heart in her ears, and when faded yellow makes its appearance, Kim’s mind breaks.

“You kept this...this...fucking...hat…” Jake snarls, crumpling the limp fabric in his mitts. “You couldn’t be fucking anyone...cause you’re still hung up on that fucking dyke..”

Kim’s breath is quick and labored as torrents of unwanted memories flood through her mind. She can feel it all-all the emotions, pain and heartache. It’s in the marrow of her bones, agonizing and acidic. Even fond memories, are drenched in his sweat, devoured by the sludge his touch brings. And in his grasp, the yellow hat turns black.

“Did you think about her when you were with me? Did you think about her touching you? _She can’t do it like I can._ I took care of you. I was there when she wasn’t. _You’d screw her if she were still alive, wouldn’t you?_ ” Freckles digs his nails into the brim of the hat and throws it to the ground. “Well you’ll be fucking together in hell.”

She watches the wind blow the keepsake into a murky puddle-watches it sink down into the cracked asphalt like tar. _Trini.._ The world as Kim sees it clouds in a grey vignette, and it’s as if her past is being projected like a movie onto the dark walls. She sees her best friend in its shadows, the lovely memories that seem like only a dream. In the woods, hiding together in the quiet, she feels the comforting tenderness of Trini’s hand, and the warmth in her own cheeks. Under the stars, merely days before she had disappeared, she relives the fluttering in her chest as she gazes down at the sleepy girl beside her. Under the stars, when she’s daring enough to caress her cheek. 

Kimberly wishes she could hold her one last time...to tell her not to leave, to take her along...Most of all, she wishes she knew how she felt back then-was able to acknowledge it sooner. She needs to tell Trini. 

She needs to tell Trini how much she loves her. If only she could.

The image in her mind’s eye stops on Trini’s somber face waving goodbye to her in the car. It flickers, faster, and faster, so much that Kim can hardly process the subtle changes. The image rolls, spins, until the girl with a butterfly barrette tacked into her plaited hair is distorted, leaving only a cracked mask and familiar hazel eyes.

“You’ve ruined it…” comes the mumbled reply, and Freckles’ lip turn upwards in confusion.

“The fuck did you just say to me?”

“You’ve ruined it, you’ve ruined it, you’ve ruined it, you’ve ruined it. YOU’VE RUINED EVERYTHING!!”

Jake leans his head away from the jarring yell, and Kim, with a newfound resilience, slams her elbow into his groin. The greasy man hollers in pain, and Kim frees herself from his clutches. Her fist surges forward, and Jake ducks under it. Two more alternative punches, and the second barrels into the center of his chest. He sputters out a cough, then puts some distance between them.

“You think you can just come at me like that? Ha! Try it, bitch.” From his waistband, another recognizable item is revealed. The jagged blade gleams in the alley lamp, and Kim’s eyebrows knit together in anger. “Like I said: A loooot of interesting things in there.”

He swings the blade with a semi-practiced hand, passing it between his fingers as the blade cuts through the air with a hiss. The ex-cheerleader dips her body inward, narrowly avoiding a wound to her stomach, and Jake closes in with another swipe towards her face. Kim’s eyes are locked on to his movements, and when Jake thrusts his arm forward again, Kim jumps to the side and grabs his wrist with both of her hands. She gives it a firm twist and uses his weight against him to propel him forward into the side of the dumpster.

He hits the wall hard, but before Kim can escape the scene, Jake grabs one of the stand alone trash cans and hurls it in front of Kim’s path. She tumbles over the obstacle and skids across the asphalt on her bare arms, yelping at the burning sensation. Jake trudges over, breathing in heavily through his clenched teeth in his rage. 

“I’ll fucking kill you, stupid whore!” He swings the blade downwards, and Kim rolls to the right to avoid being skewered. The blade comes down beside her head this time, and once more on the other side. When Jake’s hand clamps down on her neck to hold her still, Kim’s hands shoot up towards his face, and she digs the nails of her thumbs into his eyeballs. 

Jake bellows out a spine-shivering scream, and Kim yells ferociously back, pushing further as her tormentor releases his hold on the blade in favor of Kim’s wrists. 

“You crazy bitch!!” he wails. Kimberly leans her body upwards and groans with the exertion needed to throw Jake off her. Their roles now reversed, Kim recruits the blade to do her bidding. She plunges it into Jake’s chest once-three times-seven, righteous tears streaming down her face.

“You can’t hurt me anymore!!” Kim declares, her swings getting more violent. “You can’t hurt me!! You can’t hurt me!! You-can’t- _ **hurt me!!**_ ” She continues with her revenge, though the body has long since stopped moving. Her attacks slow themselves down as she gradually comes back to her senses. And as she abandons the dagger in the center of Jake’s forehead, Kim succumbs to the reality that now, she has truly committed murder.

She stares at her blood stained hands, at the red stream pooling under the corpse beneath her. She squeaks out a rattled gasp as the ringing in her ears turns supersonic. Quickly, she backs off Jake’s body and against the wall, clasping her hands over her chest in her panic. This wasn’t supposed to happen.  
This wasn’t supposed to happen. It’s too late. There’s nothing she can do. Her DNA is all over the place, and it’ll only be a matter of time before her own unit comes to arrest her. 

There’s nothing for her to do. There’s nowhere else for her to go. Nowhere...except one. It all leads back to the beginning-it all leads back to _her_.

She has to run.


	11. Unravel Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 4 AM and I just finished this chapter. The moment you've all been waiting for!
> 
>  
> 
> In the next chapter!!

The city lights are cruel and mocking. Kimberly’s knuckles burn white on the steering wheel; her palms, glued to the leather with the red adhesive. Her posture is rigid, and there’s some slight attempt to appear normal for the view inside her car window. But her legs tremble, her foot increasing the speed of her vehicle ever faster. The faded cap rests on her lap, and every few seconds, she glances down to make sure it’s still there. 

She feels like she’s being watched. Her eyes flicker over the orange streets and the yellow eyes of the buildings flicker back. They’re observing her. It’s their turn to peer inside her window now. It’s their turn to condemn. And oh, how it stings... 

Her mind replays her sins, over and over, without delay. Kim’s fingers twitch as the feeling of the blade in her hands ghosts over. It’s a terrible, terrible reflex that has her grip on the wheel falter for just a second. Her hands plunge the blade into Jake’s chest several times over, and the vision has Kim reeling once again. ‘It has to be a mistake. It has to be a lie.’ she thinks to herself. But the reflection in her rearview mirror proves otherwise. Her face is dotted with splatters of blood, already beginning to crust over, her eyes are unfocused and dilated. 

No, there’s no use trying to deny any further. She’s swam in denial for too long. Invading thoughts cram inside her head. It was justified, wasn’t it? She was allowed to protect herself, wasn’t she? Her department would have to believe her, wouldn’t they?

Kimberly has made three mistakes. One; she let her anger get the best of her, and committed egregious acts of violence. Two; she had fled a crime scene. Three; an unforgivable part of her felt good.

She had probably made many more errors, but those alone stood out to her then. Most of her department had already suspected her of one murder, and with her DNA all over the place, it doesn’t matter if they deemed it a fair struggle; they’d find a way to condemn her formally for both. Kimberly doesn’t stand well with homicide anymore. Perhaps she could have fought for herself, but she gets the feeling she’d find some way to make matters worse.

Kim spies her apartment complex down the road, and gives a sigh of relief at the lack of squad cars surrounding it. Good. The way she is now, it’d be suicide to try to walk through the lobby doors now. So she parks her car in the furthest parking space away from the entrance, caring not that it does not belong to her, and sneaks around to the fire escape at the side of the building. She reaches her window on the third story, finding it wide open. The bile rises up in her throat.

Sure enough, her room is in complete disarray. Her drawers hang open, with most of her clothing either on the floor or dangling over the side. Her computer and keyboard are smashed, and her bed sheets are stained with the impression of another person. It’s amazingly difficult to fight back the pure scream of frustration and anger within herself, yet somehow the former detective manages. In a flurry, Kimberly tugs the sheets off her bed and throws them into the corner, wiping her hands on her jeans as if they were suddenly contaminated despite the muck already on them. 

That reminds her. She can’t stay long. Kim pulls out her duffel bag from her closet and packs it full of any clothes and belongings Jake hadn’t seemed to touch. Satisfied enough, she enters her washroom for a quick shower. As the hot water hits her skin, she lets out an exhausted sigh and begins to scrub her skin raw. She doesn’t want any trace left of that man on her ever again, though in all honesty, she had to smile at the fact there never would be.

Not long after, she’s back on the road, car wiped clean and yellow had dangling off the rearview mirror. Kim has a long drive ahead of her tonight, and there is absolutely no promise of anything good waiting for her at the end of her journey. Nevertheless, an unshakable feeling beckons her further down the path she’s on. Maybe running was just an excuse to go back. Maybe it was an excuse to move forward. 

Whatever the answer, she continues down the lonely road. Her hunch could just be a fluke-an act of masochism or whichever you would like to call it. She should have known, in all honesty. After all, someone is no doubt waiting for her at the finish line, and Kimberly has a hat to return.

\----------------------

“The Pit? You’ve gotta be kidding me.” Jason ducks under the yellow police tape and Zack follows after. “I was making plans to come here this weekend, too…”

“That’s rough, buddy.” Jason says flatly, and Zack scoffs offendedly. 

“You say that, but you haven’t tried their bar! And their DJ is freakin’ amazing! I remember this one time I went there, and there was this girl, and she was so--Are you listening to me?”

“Zack, someone’s been _murdered_. This is hardly the time to talk about your club diving.”

Zack’s shoulders deflate, and he scratches the back of his neck with mild embarrassment. “Oh, yeah...Kinda got carried away there.” 

They pass into the alleyway, where forensics is already cleaning up. Billy waves excitedly and hurries over to the detectives. “Hi there, Zack! Hi Jason! Haven’t seen you guys in a while! Well, I guess that’s a _good_ thing considering someone’s been killed, but it sure is nice to see some friendly faces! Oh, by the way, where’s Kim?” He scans the area briefly, humming as he does so. “She’s your partner now, isn’t she, Jason?”

Both detectives frown, and Billy seems to worry that he must have said something wrong.

“Kim...Kim quit.” Zack tells him, and Billy shares their frown.

“Oh, that’s too bad...I liked Kim. Why’d she quit?”

“That’s something you’ll have to ask Kim.” Jason says. “It’s not our place to say.”

Billy gives his head a nod and drops the subject. “So, about this case…”

The three men head over to the uncovered body and Zack squints hard at the carnage. “Jesus, who had it out for this guy?”

“How many stab wounds, Billy? Any other wounds we’re not seeing?”

The forensics specialist looks at his clipboard and taps his pen against the bottom of it. “Thirty-two from what we could count in the chest-slash-abdomen, and of course, the obvious knife in the forehead and gouged eyeballs. Other than that, we need to wait for the coroner to take the body to find out anything else.”

Zack grimaces at the hollowed eye sockets and turns his face to Billy’s for distraction. “You take any samples?”

“Of course. My partners already sealed the swabs away. We scraped out the dirt from the fingernails, dusted for fingerprints on the weapon, and took a blood sample from the eye sockets to see if we can get a match for contaminates. “

Jason gives him a prideful pat on the back. “Great work, Billy. Let us know when you’ve got something.”

“Can do! I’ve gotta head back to the labs now, but you two will be the first to know what we find!”

The two detectives offer their thanks, and bid a farewell as Billy heads off with the rest of his team. Zack and Jason step off to the side to converse, and Zack rests his hands on his hips, giving a heavy sigh. 

“Shit’s crazy. You almost never get used to this sort of thing, do ya?”

Jason shrugs with agreement and taps his lips with his thumb. “You’ve gotta be crazy to ever get used to murder. Let’s check out the area, see if we can piece together what happened.”

They split off into different directions, scanning the alleyway thoroughly before they reconvene back to their little corner outside the club’s side door.

“I’ve got a turned over trash can, but nothing important in or outside of it.” Zack states. “Not too far from the body. Think they knocked it over in a fight?”

“Well the fence over there is slightly bent in one area, and there are a couple scratches on the bricks near the dumpster. It’s most likely what happened.”

“What do you think they were fighting over? Or was it just a one-off attack?”

Jason shakes his head and gives another shrug. “Hard to say. It could be either.”

“But the guy’s been turned into a freakin’ pin cushion and his eyes are-I don’t even want to _talk_ about that part, dude.” He pauses for a moment, then continues. “What if this guy and the last guy are connected somehow?”

“You mean the one you found strung up in that abandoned building?” Zack nods, and Jason’s eyebrows raise, seeming to be deeply considering the possibility. “They look pretty close in age, but the operandi are different.”

“How do you mean?”

“The first was obviously more constructed. Someone took their time to plan and set up the kill. The victim was lured into a secluded location, and murdered there. This seems more sporadic, don’t you think? I don’t think alleyways outside a popular nightclub are an ideal place to kill someone.”

Zack scratches his ear and hums along to Jason’s reasoning. “You’re probably right on this one. But still, even if it is unrelated, you have to admit that our perp had a bone or two to pick with the guy.”

“Maybe so. But what’s safe to say is that there was a fight, the attacker had a knife, the victim fought back, and it ended with his death.”

Zack glances back at Jake’s body as the coroners come to take it away, and furrows his eyebrows slightly in contemplation. “Or what if was the other way around…”

Jason stares at his new partner, then follows the coroners’ movements as the crime scene begins to wrap up. “Guess we’ll just have to wait for Billy’s results tomorrow…”

\----------------------

The sandbag swings back and forth from the flurry of blows against its face, chain creaking under the pressure. Trini throws her fists relentlessly at the dummy, hands wrapped with professional care although it isn’t enough to stop her blistered knuckles from breaking further. She adds swift kicks into her combos, just as heavy if not more powerful than her fists. She is C4 in a pint-sized package. She is a perfect product hand crafted by the one before her. Trini knows only frustration and self-disappointment as she abuses the sandbag, and releases all her inhibitions on a subject she doesn’t have to clean up after.

She’s screwed up again. She’s lost her target and ended up killing someone completely off her list. To make things worse, she left a witness. Trini can practically hear the scornful tyrade Rita would have been on were she still around, and it only spurs on her misdirected aggression towards the bag. Had Rita been there with her, that child would not have been left alive. It was just one of those things her caretaker couldn’t change about her. No matter how many wrongs she has done, hurting a child was something Trini was incapable of.

~

“Do it, Saber!” the witch yells, shoving the adolescent girl forward. “Take the shot!”

Trini’s hands shake violently as she points the gun to the bound and gagged captive before her. He’s not much younger than her at all; around twelve or thirteen if she’s guessing correctly. The boy screams through the scarf in his mouth and his hands are flexing frantically behind the chair. He looks blindly upwards, sensing Trini’s presence before him, and pleads wordlessly to her, appealing to the humanity still within her. 

“Take the shot, Saber! Do it now!”

She’s a foot or two away from her target, but even that far away is too close for her. She pities him, fears for him-in many ways, he reminds her of herself. He was never given a choice either. It’s almost as if she can hear the words Rita has denied him, and she imagines herself in his position. Would the person on the opposite end of the trigger be so hesitant with her? Would it be better if it was her instead? 

Trini doesn’t want to kill the boy. She doesn’t want to rob him of a life he has barely begun to live. She would want someone to do the same for her, wouldn’t she?

Her arms lower the gun slowly, and she murmurs a string of apologies for the boy. It is Rita who decides that they will not be accepted. Rita storms up beside Trini and snatches the revolver from her hands. Her arm extends rapidly, and she fires a single bullet between the boy’s eyes without so much as a blink. 

Trini’s captor sheathes the gun in her waistband and heaves a disgruntled sigh. “You have failed me once again, Saber.” Trini stares at the boy slumped over in the chair with a dumbfounded expression plastered on her face. She mourns, not knowing if there would be anyone else left to mourn for him. “One of these days, you will have to pull that trigger. If you are to take over the family business, I need you to be completely ready and willing to take a life.”  
Metallic nails rest against Trini’s cheek as Rita raises her head to meet her eyes. “You are most valuable to me. And despite your weakness, I know that one day you will honor me by being even better.” The stolen child remains silent and still under her captors clutches, and Rita gives what could only be the barest resemblance to a kind smile. “One day, you will know the thrill.”

~~

The day came sooner than expected. Though it had been years since the boy was taken, and Rita’s will was imposed upon her, Trini felt as if the past four years fell on the same day. At the age of nineteen, and technically an adult, she had remained in Rita’s estate. “You will go outside when I deem you ready for it.” she remembers Rita saying. Of course, Rita’s tutoring required ‘fieldwork’, but it was always together and never alone. With Rita along for the ride, it meant that there would be fewer slip ups. It also meant there would be no chance to escape.

She had learned to play the part of obedient servant fair enough, yet Rita remained ever suspicious of the silent girl. Trini had yet to gain her trust completely, but at this point it didn’t matter. She would have to settle for what she could get.

The city was intoxicating for Trini. Bustling, full of life, full of possibilities and the unknown-and freedom. If she had less self control and more stupidity, she would tear away from Rita’s side to get lost in the hum of the crowds. Each field trip was a breath of smoggy air, but Trini desired nothing more than to wallow in it. She would get a small apartment in the busiest part of town, find a normal job at a coffee shop or something, and who knows? Maybe she would make some friends. 

Her thoughts were always carefully hidden behind steel doors and a plastic frown, however. Any deviation from Rita’s agenda would be disastrous, so Trini let her dreams die. Normal for Trini was killing off who she wanted to be. 

~~~

Alpha hums proudly at the delicacy sitting on the kitchen counter. Over at the wine rack, Trini selects an ancient wine to pair. She carries it over to the serving tray, and Alpha’s eyes light up excitedly. 

“Oh! This is a good year! Excellent taste, mistress Saber! I’m sure master Rita will be pleased with our combined efforts!” The robot reaches for the bottle, but clasps onto air as Trini pulls it back.

“Let me.” she says, guarding the bottle as if it were precious gold. “You still have many duties to take care of, and I wouldn’t want Rita to damage you for taking too long. Let me bring dinner-as a team effort.”

Alpha’s mechanical mannerisms appear more jovial as Trini moves the serving tray over to her side. “My, how considerate! You truly are shaping up to be a fine young mistress! Yes, you bring the food, and I’ll fix that obnoxious lightbulb in the foyer!”

“Thank you, I’ll let Rita know of your progress.”

“I must go! Tell the master I said enjoy!”

Trini waves lazily to the robot as he hurries out of the room, and Trini sets out a glass. A few minutes later, Trini enters the long dining hall from the kitchen and walks steadily over to the end of the table.

“Saber? Where’s Alpha? He better be short-circuiting.” Rita snarls, and Trini stands patiently beside her, placing down the dishes neatly in front of her.

“I had him update the security mainframe. It’s been too long and with the Leroux dilemma going on, I thought it better to reconfigure our defenses.”

Rita hums thoughtfully and taps her nails on the tablecloth. “Yes, I was just thinking the same thing...it seems you and I are finally on the same page.” Trini begins a steady pour of the wine into Rita’s glass until the lady of the house raises her hand to stop it. “That’s enough.”

Trini corks the bottle and nods courteously before stepping away from the table with the tray. Rita cuts into the prime cut of steak and hums in delight at the first bite. 

“For a machine, he sure is a great cook.”

“Indeed.”

She waits. The clock ticks by mind-numbingly slow, and Trini watches bit by bit as Rita consumes her meal. Finally, she takes a sip of wine. It downs easily, and Rita finishes her glass in seconds. The glass makes a soft clink against the wood, and Rita exhales cooly. She picks up her utensils once again. Her fork stops short of her mouth, and Trini knows it’s working. Rita sputters out a gargled choke, and her hand begins to shake violently. The fork drops to the table, and Rita fights her weakening state to push herself out of her chair. 

Her legs give way underneath her, and she falls backwards, knocking over the seat with her. The lady of the house claws at the patterned carpet and jerks her head to glare up at Trini.

“Y-you…”

Trini strides over swiftly and kneels beside her captor, face bearing no emotion. Rita attempts to push herself off the ground with her elbows, but a single tap of Trini’s finger against her forehead is enough to send her collapsing back down. Rita’s body goes completely numb, leaving only her eyes the luxury of rolling back and forth. 

“You were right not to trust me.” Trini whispers. She waves her hand in front of Rita’s face inquisitively and chuckles as Rita’s eyes squint tightly. “You have no...idea...how long I’ve waited for this moment.” 

The lady of the house groans hoarsely.

“At least now we can say I’ve honored you. Since, I am better than you after all…” Trini brings Rita’s revolver from her waistband and presses it directly to Rita’s forehead. “And don’t worry,” she says cooly, cocking the firing pin, “I can take the shot.”

~

Trini catches the sandbag, bring its swinging to a halt and pants from the heavy workout. She grabs her towel off the rack behind her and dabs at the sweat coating her forehead. She guzzles from her water bottle and sighs with relief , then slings her towel around her neck as she plops down onto the bench. The T.V. flickers on with her command, and she switches it to the local news station to unwind.

Cloudy skies for the next few days and low weather, traffic on the highway, a woman at Walmart threatening an employee for not allowing her to stay twenty minutes past closing-the usual. No reports yet. But for how long? She lets it roll of her shoulders; no use stressing out all over again. The commercials roll by without much to comment on, and the station returns with its spinning logo and jarring trumpets. 

The man on screen misses his cue by four seconds and stumbles over his first words. “David, I’m standing outside local nightclub “The Pit” where a body was discovered the night before.” The camera pans out to reveal the sealed off entrance to the club and alleyway, where multiple regulars of the club gossip and complain to each other in the background. 

“Employees discovered the gruesome scene at approximately 4:30 in the morning as they were taking out the garbage. The police have yet to comment on the matter, and have released no public information besides the victim’s name.” A freckled man’s picture is inserted onto the screen, and Trini’s grip on her water bottle tightens as the captioned name fades into view under the portrait. “ There is no word from friends or family of the victim as far as we know, but we will update as more information is given to us. Back to y-”

A throbbing pain presses against Trini’s head, and she pushes her palm firmly against it to mitigate the sensation. All at once, the trio from her past is brought into the forefront of her mind, and Trini lets out a sharp cry as a heavy stream of memories pound against her skull. The two boys from before are cloaked back in shadows and the scribbles dance over their forms until the shadows unravel them into nothingness. The girl remains, still, all but her face and signature butterfly barrette visible. The pencil scribbles over her face flicker, waver to and fro, and Trini falls to her knees as her entire being is absorbed into trying to uncover the girl’s face. 

The girl holds her hand out to Trini, and Trini desperately attempts to meet her halfway. She’s almost there-she almost has her! But the girl is being pulled back into the canvas and Trini cries out to her in vain. Eventually, the girl’s form disappears altogether and Trini lets out a wail of vexation as the last piece of the puzzle withers away before her. Another surge of images flashes through-obscure things, nature, dark hallways and crowded boarding rooms. None of them fit together, and Trini begs for it all to just stop. 

It’s over. She’s met a dead end. 

Then, salvation. The last image; chipped white letters on a splintered grey sign.

_Sandy Pines._


	12. Heavy Weather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time

Droplets of rain splatter onto Kim’s windshield, leaving blurry streaks that only smudge against the wipers. The abandoned dirt road turns to dark mud under her tires, and leave their tracks emblazoned in the damp earth. The dense treeline fades out, and Kim takes a right turn down a nearly hidden path. The car jostles around over the uneven gravel, and the ex-detective peers through the screen of rainwater to make out the old building. 

Kim pulls the car under the cover of one of the tired oaks in the front yard, and kills the engine. The rain is louder now, without the mechanical rumble, and Kimberly takes a deep breath to steel herself. She stays in her seat for a few minutes, not quite ready to venture out into her former prison. It’s now or never. Kim tenderly removes the hat from the mirror and tucks it neatly into the front pocket of her rain jacket. Her hand rests on the door handle, hesitating for just a moment before finally exiting the car. 

The lone woman pulls her hood over head and hurries to the door as the heavy weather pours. The building has been long out of use, now, and signs of plant overgrowth are already beginning to show in the mossy steps and weeded boards. The doorknobs are rusted, and it takes a bit of force and luck to bust the doors open. The soggy wood groans in protest, and Kim seals the entrance once inside. 

The room is bare, with the slightest of indications that people once lived there. What little furniture left in the common area is either tattered and grimy, or covered with dirty sheets. Kimberly explores the ancient ruins, running bare fingers over dusty shelves and countertops, imagining the facility in its prime. The grey walls are replaced with red wood, and the furniture is more plentiful and pristine. A small box television sits on the entertainment stand at the west wall, and Kim looks on as groups of children gather around the airing program or lounge about reading. 

She turns towards the kitchen and sees Miss Holly attempting to cook as even more youths run about her and get under her feet. As she walks to the main hall, the children disappear, and the walls fade back to their sullied grey. The hallway livens, and children appear in the window seats, drawing faces on the frost-covered windows. They fade as she passes them, and a new section of the hall brightens. Landscape oil paintings and group photos decorate the walls, and as the lost woman leaves each one, the paintings dissolve away to reveal the ashen shapes of where they once hung.

During Kim’s later years of adolescence, the orphanage had its fair share of financial struggles. Miss Holly had tried her best to recruit more help, being too old to take care of most things herself. And though the volunteers came and went, it seemed that the facility was just too obscure for word to get around. Its secluded location and backwards ways wiped itself of the map, and eventually, the generous benefactors that once kept the place standing withdrew their money and the funding fell through.

Kim was lucky enough to leave for college on a scholarship the year before the orphanage shut down, and admittedly, she felt a little guilty for leaving everyone behind. Children were relocated, and it seems that the entire residence slipped into obscurity. Now, the corridors are cold and dismal, left forgotten to the outside world. They were all forsaken children, and perhaps, Trini was the most forgotten of them all. If Kim concentrated hard enough, she could still feel her presence as it once was. Her heart aches even more when she stumbles into the bunk rooms. She wanders over to her bed once was and kneels down to touch the space it occupied. 

She remembers the first night Trini slept over, and all the subsequent nights after that. Trini hardly spent any time in her own bed, preferring Kim’s warmth and company. But Kim also knew she also stayed for her. Trini was her protector, and Kimberly always slept the best when the smaller girl was beside her. She wants to curl up like that again. 

Kim gazes out the window at the field behind the building with longing and sighs. Her eyes glance down at her phone’s screen, which illuminates the displayed date and time.

It’s so uncannily perfect in the most perverse way, for her to arrive at Sandy Pines today, Fourteen years later; the anniversary of Trini’s death.

\---------------------------

_**8 Hours Earlier…** _

Forensic specialist, Billy Cranston, walks down the hall towards the homicide department, polished loafers dragging across the floor. His face is adorned with an unrecognizable emotion, and those who pass him in the hallway stare with judgemental looks. It’s not anything out of the ordinary for him to receive such reactions, but right now, others are the last thought on his mind. He clutches his files to his chest tightly as if protecting a wounded animal, and opens the door with sweaty palms. 

Billy weaves through the desks, and gains more haste when he catches sight of Zack and Jason huddled around one of their desks. He knocks over some belongings as he squeezes through the desk spaces, and mutters sincere apologies on his way forward. Zack perks up his head, and Jason acknowledges the man as well.

“Billy, what have you-”

“You guys, over here!” the scientist interrupts, grabbing Jason by the sleeve and pulling the two detectives in a train to an unoccupied corner of the office. 

“What’s wrong, man?” Zack asks, and Billy shakes his head quickly.

“I didn’t want to believe it, I didn’t!” the trembling man declares, “But I did the tests as many times as I could, and there’s no-there’s no denying it anymore!”

Jason grabs Billy by the shoulders gently and holds him still. “Hey, hey, calm down, Bill. It’s gonna be alright. Tell us what happened.”

Billy takes a few deep breaths, and his hold on the files loosen. “I ran the DNA tests, and I’ve found a positive match on all the samples. I know who killed Mr. Sanderson.”

“Well, that’s great, Billy.” Zack says, “Who is it?”

Billy’s face turns grave, and he slowly turns over the file to Zack, whose eyes widen in disbelief. The woman with short, dark locks stands before an American flag, and Jason’s jaw hangs open as he leans over to see. “It’s Kim…”

~

Jason hurries out of the sergeants’ office, and the said man barges out immediately after. “Everyone. Look alive!” The sergeant shouts, and all officers immediately stand to attention or stop what they were doing. He tacks Kim’s picture to the whiteboard with a magnet, and the tension of the entire group cuts through the air as they stare at the image. “I want her found and apprehended immediately! We got a complete match on the Sanderson case!”

“Wait, Serge, you aren’t saying that-” Jones begins, but the sergeant is already shutting him down.

“The evidence does not lie. Miss Hart is responsible for the murder of Jake Sanderson, and I want her back in this building, now!”

Eyes wander to and from each other, none of the information being completely absorbed yet, and no one really wanting to believe it. 

The sergeant slams his fist on the board, and his workers jump from the bang. “Get out there, go!”

~~

Zack’s phone rings against his ear, six times before the call gets rejected.

‘Hey, this is Kim, I’ll get back to you later.’

He sighs and stashes his phone into his breast pocket, and Jason glances over at him from the driver’s seat. “I wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t answer.”

Zack gazes out the window, slumped over against the door. “I still can’t wrap my mind around this...I _know_ Kim. She’s not capable of something like this..”

Jason turns his attention back to the road, and takes a beat of silence before responding. “Anyone can be capable of killing someone. It just takes the right circumstances.”

Zack scrunches up his nose and whips around in his seat to face his partner. “The fuck is wrong with you, dude? You’re saying that _I_ could be capable of _murdering_ someone like that? That Kim could?”

“I didn’t-no, I just-you saw Billy’s report, Zack. It’s all lined up.”

“And how do we know that the guy didn’t deserve it?”

“Zack-”

The asian man rests his elbow on the back of his seat, and throws his hand out animatedly as he talks. “We don’t know the whole story! We could only guess! Who’s to say Kim wasn’t the one being attacked?”

“And if she was? She decided to stab him 32 times in the chest?”

Zack falls back against his seat and tears his eyes away from Jason. “We don’t know. Anything could have happened..”

Jason lifts a hand from the wheel to tousle it through his hair. “When we find her, we’ll question her, and then we can get the whole picture.” Jason’s car pulls up to Kim’s apartment building, and they park outside the entrance. “Let’s see if she’s home.”

The two detectives make their way to Kim’s floor, and they pause outside her apartment. They each take a side as protocol, and Zack gives a light rap on the door. “Kim? Kim, it’s Zack.” No answer. “Kim? I know you had a reason.” Jason shoots him a glare, and Zack acknowledges it with his own, then continues to address his old partner. “I just wanna know what happened.”  
They wait for the answer that never arrives. “Ki-”

“We’re coming in!” Jason yells over, and his hand twists the doorknob to find it open. His gun is drawn, and he points it first as he steps into the room.

“Jase!” Zack scolds, but the transfer detective doesn’t listen. 

All is normal, until they push open the door to Kim’s bedroom. It’s still chaos in there, and the men find themselves scratching their heads after checking that the coast is clear. Jason stalks around the room, and Zack peers into the bathroom. 

“She’s not here.”

“I know that.”

Zack leans against the door frame and crosses his arms disapprovingly. “So what ya thinking now, boss? That Kim trashed her own room and belongings? I mean, Kim’s messy, but _this_ is a little too much, yeah?" 

Jason holsters his weapon and puts his hands on his hips. “You’re being a child, Zack. How much longer are you going to be so passive-aggressive? This is serious. Kim killed somebody.”

“All I’m saying is this doesn’t make sense for Kim to do. She could be missing for all we know!”

“Well, we don’t know!” Jason blows hot air through his teeth and pinches the bridge of his nose. “She hasn’t answered any of our calls, but we can still head back and see if we can run tracking on her phone.”

Zack pushes himself upright, and heads out ahead of Jason. “Fine by me. Give me your keys, I’m driving.”

\------------------------

The drive to Sandy Pines took far longer than expected. But thanks to the agility and convenience of her bike, and the lack of traffic on the old country roads, Trini was able to make it there before the afternoon had hit its midpoint. The rain was still hurtling down from the sky, but other than the necessary safety precautions, it didn’t bother Trini in the slightest. The water rolls off her helmet without a trace, and her grip is steady on the handles. 

Alpha’s recorded voice plays through the bluetooth in her ear, and she follows his instructions, taking an off-road path through the trees. Alpha declares her destination met, and Trini cuts off the motor. She looks around the dense wood, and sighs through her nose at the knockoff GPS. The masked woman trudges through the mud and foliage, keeping her eyes peeled for any buildings. Admittedly, she gets a vague sense of familiarity as she walks, though she can’t quite place where its from.

A rupture of giggles in the distance catches Trini’s attention, she pivots on her heels to catch the sound. The mysterious child is teetering across one of the mossy logs, arms spread out wide for balance. Trini only manages to get a glimpse of her back, but she knows without a doubt that it’s the same girl from before, if not a little bit taller.. 

“I just have better balance than you, Trini. That’s why you fell in the creek and I didn’t!”  
Trinity looks around confusedly, surely she isn’t speaking to her, right? “Hey, hey! When we grow up, do you want to get a dog? I want a big one-a real fluffy one! But you seem more like a cat person. I guess it usually works out like that, though.” The girl wobbles, and just manages to steady herself. She carries on like nothing happened. 

The child hops off the log and continues on her journey, to which Trini finds herself following evenly behind her.

“When we live on our own together, I’m gonna cook you so many good meals! Well, first I gotta learn how to cook, but one day!” 

It continues on for some time, the faceless child rambling on about anything and nothing in particular. Trini doesn’t mind. In fact, she finds it extremely endearing. As much as she is confused, and perhaps even a little worried for her well being at this point, Trini silently listens to the girl speak, even going so far as to copy her mannerisms and path step-by step. 

Trini hops onto another log behind her, and holds her arms out as she does with more stable footing. The apparition never looks back to her-doesn’t do anything more than speak-but Trini has never before felt so welcome and at ease. Trini never replies-she doesn’t have to-and still, their conversation doesn’t seem to require it. 

“It’s so rare we get to stay like this now..” the child tells her. “But, I like talking to you! Even if you never say anything back…” Trini snaps out of her reverie, and latches on to that last statement. Just what the hell is going on…? “Miss Holly says it’s good to process these kinds of things.” 

She slows to a stop, and Trini waits a few feet back, curiously observing. The girl in pink’s posture goes lax, and her small hands ball up at her sides. Trini can tell that she’s on the verge of tears, and it breaks her heart to see it. 

“I’m sorry…” the girl sobs, wiping at her face with the back of her arm. “I was so selfish...I’m so selfish….” Trini steps forward, and attempts to rest her hand on the girl’s shoulder, but it slips through like a cloud of mist and Trini’s eyes go wide behind her mask. “I miss you, Trini…” The shadow says as it disappears into smoke. “I miss you….so much….”

Trini grasps at the air with both hands, desperately trying to tether the mirage to the physical world. The smoke dissipates in her palm, and when it clears, Trini peers down at the sad little cross poking out a bed of yellow weeds.

~

Kimberly heads back down the rickety steps, having found nothing on the second story. She heads out the back door, and takes her firsts steps into the rain once more. The drive wasn’t a complete waste of time, she supposes. She’d neglected the only important piece of the land here, and though there was nothing physically significant stored here, it carried great sentimental value to Kimberly. It helped her to cope, in her youth, and perhaps it would bring her some sort of comfort now. 

The ex-detective moves over the dead grass, then halts. In the distance, at the end of the field, kneels the masked figure. Kimberly squints to see further, and it is apparent that they are beside the grave Kim had made for Trini all those years ago. Her breath lingers in her throat, and Kim’s heart rate picks up three times faster. 

She’s here.

Trini notices the stranger across from her, and slowly rises to her feet. Kim needs to let her know who she is. She has no doubt the woman will recognize her now. She walks forward, cautiously as if trying not to startle a wild animal, and raises her hands above her head to lower her hood. Trini stays still, no doubt staring at her under the mask, and Kim stands in the center of the field, blinking away the water that drips down into her eyes. Trini takes a couple steps toward her, and Kim waits for her to make the first move. She does.

Trini’s sprinting at her, combat boots gliding over the damp earth full stride. Kim’s gasp only makes it halfway out as Trini’s right fist sails through the air and her knuckles brush against the tip of Kim’s nose. The ground is too slippery, and Trini’s trajectory was compromised. She bounces back, and strikes out at Kim again, who blocks throw with her forearm.

“Wait, stop! It’s me!!” Kim appeals, but there is no recognition. Kim grits her teeth as Trini’s foot strikes her hip, and it becomes obvious then that Kim will have to make Trini remember her.

The ex-detective swats Trini’s fist down, and throws her own punch at the side of Trini’s helmet. There’s static in her hand, and Kim recoils, clutching her hand with the other. ‘ _Stupid fucking helmet._ ’ She tells herself. ‘ _Way to go, Kim._ ’

Trini grips Kim by her jacket sleeves and throws her to the side. Kim rolls across the grass, then gets back to her feet, tennis shoes slipping in the mud as she does so. She’ll have to change her tactics-aim for vulnerable weak points on the body. Kim lands a harsh jab into Trini’s gut, and the masked woman lets out a brief groan. Kim aims a strike to Trini’s inner shoulder, but her advance is blocked and countered with a dynamite blow to her face. 

Trini keeps Kimberly at close distance. Her opponent’s longer legs have an advantage with more area given to her, but nevertheless, Trini knows that she is more skilled in hand-to-hand. Still, the detective puts up a good fight. Her passion and resolve are admirable-hell, she’s managed to get a few good hits on her. But having one detective around is trouble for Trini, and this lady has really been getting in her way.

Kim gets a firm grip on Trini’s coat, and the two begin to grapple for a better hand. Kimberly’s thumb hooks under Trini’s helmet, and her other hand comes down at the top of it. Trini grabs hold of her wrists, but the detective seems completely determined to never let go. The helmet begins to raise, and Kim’s head is swirling with anticipation. Trini’s jaw becomes visible under the glass and, while the nosy woman was momentarily distracted, she cranes her head as far back as she can and collides it into Kim’s.

She watches the woman fall. The detective is still reeling, head visibly spinning as she attempts to even sit up. It’s almost pitiful, like a butterfly caught in a spider’s web. What was this girl even doing here in the first place? If she was coming to arrest her, then why did she come alone? Honestly, she’s had enough of all this problem solving bullshit. She stands over Kim, and shakes her head at her. 

“Please…” the detective calls weakly, “Let me see your face...I want to see your face…” Trini’s hand lets go of the blade hidden in the lining of her coat, and stares down at Kim with confusion. She seems oddly calm for someone in her position-maybe she hit her a little _too_ hard. A thin line of blood trickles from the woman’s nose, getting smeared in the rain, but she only gazes up at Trini with the most somber of looks. “Just once…”

The storm becomes the only sound as a vulnerable silence drifts between the both of them. Thunder booms overhead, and Kim sighs defeatedly. “I tried…” 

Trini takes a few steps back, and Kim cautiously sits herself up with a little effort. Trini’s hands rest on the sides of the mask, and with a little twist, the helmet slides off her head. A low chuckle escapes Kim, and it becomes difficult for Trini to tell if it’s only the rain, or tears, that stain her face.

“You’re so beautiful...You’re so beautiful, Trini…”

Trini’s pouty lips part slightly, and her honey hazel eyes blink in slow motion. “How do you-”

Kim unzips the pocket on her jacket and unfolds the baseball cap from it. She squeezes the fabric once for comfort, then tentatively holds it out to its rightful owner. “This belongs to you.” she says softly, “we made a promise….remember?”

Trini drops the helmet beside her and takes hold of the age-worn hat. As soon as her fingers trace the frayed stitching, the most intense migraine sweeps over her. She groans and falls to her knees, digging her fingers into her scalp as her brain swells against her skull. She lets out an agonized scream, and Kimberly grabs hold of her to keep her from shaking.

“Trini!! Trini, what’s wrong?! Trini!”

Her life is flashing before her eyes in reverse, then sporadically. From Rita’s death, to her own abduction. From years living under the witch’s rule, to the car crash. Jake and Jimmy fade into view, and then Jimmy’s murder by her hands. Jake’s picture on the t.v. comes next, then back to the old memory of being chased through the woods.

Trini claws at her head, and Kim fights her hands back for her, shouting to snap her out of it. Kim’s past self stands before her, and the charcoal mask is erased, finally unveiling her full glory. The memories, as well as the emotions attached to them, speed by even faster to the point Trini feels she’ll pass out. Their fight before the day they left, sharing a bed together during the night, holding hands in the dark-it all comes rushing back.

_You’re the most important person in my life, Kim...The most...special thing...._

Trini’s body suddenly slumps forward, and Kim shrieks in terror. “Trini! Trini, wake up!!” She shakes the vigilante roughly, and lifts up her head. “Trini, don’t play around!!”

The younger woman whimpers, and she slowly raises her head to meet Kim’s eyes. “Kim….Is that really you…?” She places her hand to Kim’s swollen cheek, and Kim gently leans into it. “Are you real…?”

Kimberly lays her hand on top of Trini’s and laces the fingers of their opposite hands. She lets out a short laugh, and nuzzles Trini’s cold skin. “Yeah, it’s me...It’s me…”

Trini doesn’t stop admiring the woman in front of her. Her eyes travel over Kim’s features-really, truly, seeing her for the first time through a softer lens. “I found you...I finally found you…” Her eyebrows dip, and her eyes brim with tears she believed to have ran out long ago. “Oh, Kim...I’m so s-gyhk!”

Kimberly’s fist connects to the left side of Trini’s face, and the vigilante’s mouth hangs open as her hand presses against the sore spot. “That’s for making me think you were dead and trying to kill me- _ **twice**_ ”

Trini frowns, and glues her eyes to the grass. “I’m sorry...I’m so sorry...I never meant to leave you behind. I never wanted to forget you…”

Kim sits back. “Then why did you?”

“Well, I didn’t. At least, not completely…” Trini fishes around in one of her pockets, and unfurls her fingers. Kim picks the butterfly barrette from Trini’s palm and gasps silently. “I kept it all these years, never truly knowing what it meant, but that it was important to me..”

“I can’t believe you held onto this the whole time…” Kim marvels, turning the bedazzled accessory between her fingers. “

Trini twiddles her thumbs, and hangs her head low. “I...lost my memories a long time ago. Exactly when, I’m not sure. I had to-to survive.” She finally matches Kim’s dark eyes, and the decade’s worth of guilt hits her full swing. “Kim, I-I...I’ve done some terrible things. I’ve killed people….all of them, for my own gain...Kim-....I was going to kill anyone just to know who you were…”

Kim bites her lip and takes Trini’s hand into her own. “I don’t care. I should have known, the night we found Jimmy, but...I just couldn’t admit to myself the possibility that you were the one behind the mask.” She brushes the wet hair from Trini’s face, then runs her thumb over her cheek. “And, in a lot of ways, it wasn’t. But I don’t care about what you’ve done, Trini. Not anymore. I’ve spent most of my life _mourning_ you...and I’ve prayed that you would come back one day...Who am I to take it all back now..?”

“Kim…”

Trini hums at the warmth of Kim’s hand, and Kimberly’s eyes travel down to the shininess of her lips; her thumb, following the curve of Trini’s face until it rests under her chin. Trini’s eyes go half-lidded, and she takes a sharp intake of breath as Kim’s lips meet her own. Kim is the undisputed answer to everything Trini has ever wondered, and all she ever needs to know. She’s so clumsy compared to Kim, having no real practice with-well, _anyone_. It’s a little awkward, but it’s also just right. Years of separation and woe taste like honey on her tongue. They feel each other’s raw emotions, and a feverish starvation becomes self-evident as Trini’s hands clutch onto Kim’s jacket.

They pull away, despite the hunger still lingering between them.

Kim rests her forehead against Trini’s head with a satisfied smile, and Trini pulls Kim closer. “We’re in the rain…”

“Yeah... I don’t care, though.”

Kim nuzzles her love sweetly, and shakes her head. “We can’t stay here.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve killed someone, too..”

Trini sits back and furrows her brows. “Kim, don’t joke like that.”

The ex-detective sighs. “I’m not. My own department’s looking for me.”

Trini scours Kim’s face for truth, then stands, pulling Kim to her feet as well. “Then we’ll take my bike.”

“You actually have a bike?”

She raises a brow. “Uh, yeah? Did you think I just wear the helmet to look cool?”

“Honestly..? ...Yeah.”

Trini rolls her eyes and shakes her head with a fond smile, then bends down to pick up the helmet and hat. “Come on, let’s go dry off.”

Kim follows her love to her bike, and Trini hands her the helmet. 

“Put it on.”

Kim glances between the helmet, and the vigilante. “What?”

She jiggles the helmet in her hands. “Put it on. You need protection.”

The older woman takes the helmet, and tucks it under her arm momentarily. Instead, she clips the butterfly barrette into her hair and gives Trini a bright grin. She earns a soft smile in return.

“Beautiful. Come on, hurry up.” Trini helps secure the helmet in place, and gives it a playful tap on the glass. “Good to go.” Tucking the hat into her coat pocket, she sits down on the bike seat and starts the engine. “All aboard~”

Kimberly chuckles and sits behind Trini, wrapping her arms snugly around the smaller woman’s waist. She rests her head against Trini’s back, and through the rain, Trini’s rosy cheeks remain visible. “Trini? We’re going to be together now, right..?”

“Of course, princess.”

“Where will we go?”

Kim’s knight plants a kiss to the top of the helmet and pulls up the kickstand. “Wherever you want. Just never let go of me...”


	13. Come And Paint The World With Me Tonight

The duo arrives to the hidden estate in the late of night. The rain has come to an end, and the only signs it was ever there are the dried streaks on Trini’s motorcycle. The gates swing open, and Trini slows the ride to a low crawl. Kim stares up at the mansion in utter fascination as they pull into the yard, and Trini docks the bike into the garage. She kills the engine and hops off, holding her hand out to Kim who takes it and carefully swings her leg over the seat.

Kim takes off the helmet and adjusts her eyes to the fluorescent lights above. She marvels at the pristine condition of the garage, noting the tastefully cluttered work counter and racks of mechanic tools lined on the walls. “You must do a lot of tune ups…”

Trini shrugs, and places her helmet on the counter. “I like to take care of my things. I don’t do it alone most of the time, though.”

“Oh, who else do you live with?”

The coat and boots come off, and Trini holds both in the crook of her arm. “Just Alpha. He should be around here somewhere.”

“Alpha?”

“Take your shoes off.”

Kim blinks once, then unlaces her sneakers. Of course Trini would want to keep the place as clean as possible considering the extravagance of it all-and Kim hasn’t even been out of the garage yet! She holds the sneakers by their laces, and brushes the cold strands of hair out of her forehead. “So…”

“I have a shower you can use.” she says. The younger woman scans Kim over, and quirks her lips to the side. “I don’t think I have any clothes that will fit you, but I might have a big t-shirt lying around somewhere.”

Looking over her old friend again, Kim notices just how short the girl actually is. She’s so small...and yet, she had been so intimidated by her at first. It’s hard to imagine her being a threat in this new light. The thought makes Kim crack a smile, and she tries her best not to let a chuckle slip past. “Yeah, I love big shirts.”

Trini looks at her confusedly with a tilt of her head, then rolls her shoulders dismissively. “Okay. Sure.” She points to the door attached to the house. “This way.”

The former detective follows the smaller girl, mindful of any water that may still be dripping off her clothes. The hall directly outside the door is even more lavish than anything Kim has ever seen. The floors are spotless marble, with exotic potted plants accenting the room. Not a speck of dust lies anywhere, and Kim immediately feels underdressed for just _being_ there. She clears her throat, and shrinks into herself. “You, uh...have a nice house…”

Trini’s cheeks flush pink, and she can’t stop feeling embarrassed for some reason. “Thanks. I didn’t buy it.”

Kim furrows her brows, but decides not to say anything further. Kim can see the beginning of what looks like the foyer from the arch at the end of the hall, and once they step through, Kim realizes just how huge the home is. The chandelier and wall sconces illuminate the entire room perfectly, with pure white light that brings out the colors of the wallpaper and artworks. The Great Gatsby could have lived here, and Kim could still faint from the mere sense of atmosphere even if he didn’t. Her eyes travel the steps of the grand staircase, and she becomes completely entranced by the monumental portrait above it. 

A slender woman is captured in oil paints. Her long black hair is tied at the top of her head, accentuating her high cheekbones and pointed features. She wears a fitted green gown that dips into a deep cut down the center, and her stylized nails wrap around a golden scepter. Though beautiful in an unconventional way, Kimberly can’t help but be unnerved by the domineering glint in her eyes. She follows the line of action at her right side, and gazes, then, at the doll-like appearance of the child at her side. Her light chestnut hair is plaited neatly in a single braid down her back; her dress, a slate blue to match her worn down expression. Looking at her, Kim feels a pang of sadness, although she cannot quite place why. It eventually dawns on her, and the newcomer turns to Trini to note the obvious.

Kim’s heart breaks more, when she sees her. Trini’s lips are pressed into a thin line, and her honey eyes never stray from her feet. She bites her lip, and Kim notices the way her hands ball into fists at her sides. She just looks...so troubled...Kim wishes she knew how to help without accidentally bringing up any painful memories.

“I...don’t like that picture…” the house’s owner says, eyes still downcast. “I hate it, actually.” She scoffs under her breath and shakes her head at herself. “I don’t know why I haven’t burned it down yet-this whole place.”

“Trini…”

The woman raises her head and gives a forced smile. “It doesn’t matter now. I’ve got you in my life again!”

Kim sighs softly and wraps her arm around Trini’s shoulders. “Yeah, you do.”

Metallic squeaking and shuffling echoes down the hall, and Kim becomes distracted by the strange noise. She searches for the cause, then jumps a little when she hears an autotune voice.

“Master Trini, you’ve returned!” Alpha calls, and his tiny body wiggles when he spots Kim. “Oh, and you’ve brought a guest!!”

Kim turns to face the sound, and she screams and jumps back upon seeing the creature in front of her, clutching onto Trini’s bicep for protection. “Jesus christ is that a fucking gremlin?!”

Trini gestures for Kim to calm down, and pats her on the shoulder. “No, no, that’s Alpha. He’s a robot.”

“You have a _**robot**_?!”

“He was here before I was.”

“You still have a robot!”

Alpha clunks over to Kim, getting up in her personal space, which causes her to take another step back. “Yes, I’m a robot! The old master of the house built me to take care of things around here!”

Trini gestures again to Kim. “Alpha, this is Kim. Kim, Alpha.”

“Kim! Ah, yes! Short for Kimberly, yes?” Kim manages to give a nod. “Wonderful!”

“Kim’s an old friend of mine I knew before I came here. We’ve known each other for a very long time and now we finally found each other again.”

Alpha glances to Trini, and his headlight eyes brighten. “Oh, you have a friend!!” The robot gets in Kim’s face again, and Kim holds her head as far away as possible. “I’m glad master Trini has finally brought someone over! She’s been very… _lonely_.”

Trini’s cheeks are stained red, and she pushes Alpha away from Kim. “That’s enough, Alpha...You don’t have to make a big deal about it...” she squeaks, and Alpha backs off.

“My apologies. I’ll make no further comment.”

Trini nods curtly. “Good. Kim and I are gonna get cleaned up and probably go to bed. So do you think you can leave us for the rest of the night?”

“Of course, master Trini. It’s no trouble at all!”

“Thank you. Let’s go, Kim.”

She follows Trini up the steps, and spares the painting a passing glance back as they reach the top. Trini brings her to a set of double doors, and she uses a key to unlock it. Trini pushes the door open, and Kim finds herself once again overly impressed. The smaller girl opens the adjacent bathroom and tosses her coat in the hamper. She sets her shoes down on the tile and returns to the bedroom, where she rifles through her drawers for Kim to wear.

Kimberly examines her shelves curiously and frowns. “You don’t have any pictures or anything in here?”

“No, not really.”

“I see..”

Trini pulls out a long white t-shirt from the back of her top drawer and holds it up to herself. Sure enough, it’s much larger than what’s needed. “Okay, I think I found-” She turns around and crashes her back against the dresser, her hand flying to her chest. “What are you doing?!”

Kim pauses midway through taking off her shirt and looks to her love in confusion. “I’m...getting out of my wet clothes..?”

“W-well not in here! You’ll get the carpet wet!” She tosses the shirt at her, and Kim catches it with one hand. “Go change in the bathroom..! There’s one down the hall!”

Kim lets her shirt fall back down and sighs. “Fine, fine. I get it, I get it. I’ll change in the bathroom.”

“G-good.”

She heads to exit the room, a little smile on her face. “I’ll find it on my own, don’t worry~” Kim chuckles and politely closes the door behind her, leaving Trini to catch her breath back inside. She’s so adorable…

Kim knocks on Trini’s door a little while later. “It’s Kim. Can I come in?”

“Yeah, go ahead!” 

Kim opens the door and finds Trini towel drying her hair on the bed. “I put my wet clothes in the hamper, if you don’t mind. I didn’t know where the laundry room was.”

“Ah, don’t worry about it. I’ll do the laundry tomorrow.”

They both look more refreshed after a long bath, and though chaotic these last few months have been, Kim feels at ease sooner than expected. “You have a nice shower?”

The pink tint is back on Trini’s cheeks, and she makes a point not to look Kim in the eyes. “ ‘S fine.”

“That’s good to hear.” The older woman sits down at the foot of Trini’s bed and folds her legs under herself. “We both kinda needed it.”

“No kidding.” Trini tosses the towel onto the back of the chair at the end of the room, and stretches her arms tiredly over head, giving a little squeak of relief. “You look a lot better.”

“Thank you.”

Trini sits against her headboard and props her elbow up on her knee. “So...do you wanna pick a guest room, or…?”

“Oh.” Kim tugs at her earlobe sheepishly and flashes a small smile. “Well...I was kinda thinking that I could stay with you tonight…” Trini’s eyes widen, and Kim catches how that must have sounded out loud. “Ah, well, I mean….we’re finally together again, and I...well, I always slept the best when you were with me and I, um...I kinda...wanna wake up and see you. So I know it’s not a dream or anything…”

Trini brings her hand to her mouth and speaks flusteredly through her fingers. “Y-yeah. That’s-that’s fine..” she clears her throat and drops her hand. “I mean, yeah. That’s cool. Cool beans.”

Kim snickers and chuckles warmly. “Who knew you were still such a dork after all these years?”

“I didn’t..”

“Hm, yeah, guess so.”

Trini’s heart had never felt so light before. It had never felt so quick, either. She subtly checks her own pulse to make sure she’s not having a heart attack or anything, then lets her hands idle once in the clear. Things have become so different for the both of them, and yet, they fell back into place so easily. There is something that has changed, though. Trini doesn’t remember-and she means _really_ remember this time-being so nervous around her best friend. They’d always shared the same bed at Sandy pines-pretty much every night, in fact. Then why, now, does Trini feel so embarrassed about it?

Kim’s still the same old Kim, she thinks. They’re just older now and have commited murder. They drift into a semi-awkward silence, both women looking anywhere but each other. Oh, but how weak Trini is. She steals a glance at the woman on her bed. Her short, damp hair hangs cooly over the left side of her face, but unlike before, it looks much more intentionally messy and wavy. Her face is slender and smooth, and she still has that adorable little mole in the corner of her lips. God, her lips..they’re naturally bright and pink; full, and they look so soft. They _are_ soft. Trini knows, Kim kissed her. 

Kim kissed her. 

She can feel her face grow hot again, and she mentally scolds herself for not being able to control it. Of course, it’s not like Trini _hasn’t_ thought about kissing her best friend in the past, but that’s like, a _normal_ thing friends do, right? Yeah, duh. Kim was just happy to see her again! That makes sense, right?

Right?

Ugh, she’s staring again. This time, her eyes wander over the white shirt. It fits Kim a lot better than it did her, but it’s still a little bit long on the taller woman, ending at the tops of her thi-  
Uh-oh, uh-oh, that was an accident. Trini brings her eyes further up, but they’re still nowhere near Kim’s face. The shirt hangs loose on her, and the collar slips down on one of her shoulders. The material is light and airy, and the way Kim’s sitting, Trini can just make out the outlines of-

“Trini..?”

She snaps to attention. “Y-yea-”

Kim’s leans over and cups her chin in her hands, kissing Trini tenderly. Trini goes limp, and her eyes blink rapidly to absorb what’s happening. Kim sits back a little, and Trini’s fingers gingerly touch her lips.

Kim exhales softly and rests her hands on the bed at either side of Trini’s legs. “I can’t take it when you look at me like that…”

“Sorry…”

The older woman shakes her head. “You don’t understand just how much I’ve missed you..”

Trini lays her hand on top of Kim’s. “I’ve missed you, too..”

Kimberly smiles and crawls over Trini, and the smaller girl’s jaw hangs open as she hits her back against the headboard.

“Kim, I-” 

Kimberly’s kissing her again, hot and heavy. Trini’s toes curl into the bedsheets, and she finds herself kissing her long lost friend with the same fervor. Kim straddles her, and it’s all Trini can do not to faint. Kim puts Trini’s hands on her waist, and Trini moans at the pressure on her hips.

Oh god, Trini didn’t even know she could make that sort of noise. She’s going crazy from the way Kim kisses her, and Trini has some idea of where things are headed, but she honestly has no idea what she’s getting into, and part of her needs to ask for reassurance.

Trini gasps for breath, and places her hand firmly on Kim’s chest to stop her. “W-wait, Kim. I don’t-I’ve never- I don’t know what- are you…” Her expression turns soft, worried. “Are you okay..with this sort of thing..?”

Kim seems to know what Trini’s skirting around-what she really means-and for a moment, her face falls flat. “I wasn’t...for a while. A long while, actually. It took years for me to get to a point where I didn’t have a panic attack someone even touched me. I still can’t really talk about it…” Trini hangs her head, and Kim heaves a heavy sigh. Her fingers lace with Trini’s, and she raises her hand to her lips to kiss Trini’s fingers gently. “But they both got what they deserved, and I have you to thank for part of that.”

Trini gazes up at her treasured person with the softest of looks, and her voice is barely above a whisper when she speaks. “I wish I could have done more for you...Kim, I wish I never had to leave you alone…”

Kimberly shakes her head and places a kiss upon Trini’s head. “You’ve given me everything I could ever want by being here with me. It’s like...I’ve finally found a part of me that I can never live without.”

“Yeah...I know what you mean…”

Kim returns to kissing Trini’s fingers, pressing her lips softly to each knuckle before doing the same to her other hand. “I didn’t realize it, when we were kids-not at first, anyway-but, I’ve always loved you…” 

Trini’s eyes widen. “You did…?”

“Mhm. More and more, each day. It was impossible not to. And I also realized, that I only wanted you to hold me like this. I only wanted you to touch me..”

Trini’s entire face turns red, and she can feel her lips growing parched. “Kim, I...I had never thought...I never got the chance to-”

“I know. I don’t mind.” Kim seems a little disappointed, even though she understands. “I just wanted you to know that.”

Kim’s weight shifts, and Trini clasps onto Kim’s hand to keep her from leaving. “I’m saying I have no idea what the fuck I’m doing and that I can’t do like, mind-blowing tricks and stuff. Frankly, I’m really freaking embarrassed about not knowing anything. But…” she pulls Kim back on top of her and caresses her cheek softly. “Will you teach me…?”

The older woman bites her lips and runs her fingers over the skin of Trini’s stomach under her night shirt. “Trini….” she breathes, lips ghosting over Trini’s , “I’ll show you how much you mean to me...I’ll show you everything…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap title is from Kesha's song Rainbow, aka one of my favorite songs. Not gonna lie listening to that the song at the end of writing this gave me feels and I'm a MESS.


	14. When We Were Younger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter deals with some of Kim's trauma through her own word in an open dialogue with Trini. 
> 
> Just a heads up for those sensitive to the topic. That particular scene ends with the second chapter break, and things mellow out from there.

The morning had never looked so beautiful than when Kimberly was beside her. Trini had awoken before the other woman had, and when she had first rolled over and come face to face with the beauty in front of her, she had near lost consciousness again. Trini’s not sure if she had ever seen Kim so at peace before in all their time together, and it gave her a sense of comfort to know that they were finally safe. 

Sunlight is entangled in Kimberly’s short locks, and Trini has the urge to run her fingers through its entirety just to feel its warmth. The woman stirs from beside her. Trini puts a little distance between them, and grabs a pillow to hold in front of her face. Kim’s eyelids gradually lift, and she mumbles at the pillow with hands, “What are you doing…?”

Oh, fuck, Kim’s sleepy voice is everything. Trini peeks over the pillow, then clears her throat gently. “Pillow….soft…”

Kim laughs, and lays her head on her arm for more support. “Your lips are soft..”

Trini hugs the pillow tighter. “So are yours…” she mumbles.

“You’re such a dork…” Kim pulls the pillow out of Trini’s arms and tosses it to the end of the bed. “No more hiding from me. Got it?”

Trini only manages a weak nod. “Got it.”

Kimberly leans forward and gives her love a heartfelt good morning kiss, and Trini lets out a hum of contentment. Kim then snuggles up to the smaller woman and rests her eyes as Trini embraces her. 

“You know...I’m really glad we got to pick up from where we left off.” Kim grunts an agreement. Trini’s fingers curl into Kim’s hair as the older woman’s head rests against her chest. “I didn’t think it was possible for us to meet again, and here we are. It’s the...happiest I’ve been in a long time…”

“I couldn’t agree more..”

“I mean, I can’t believe with all the shit that happened, we’re still best friends.”

Kim’s eyes snap open, and the smile that was on her face appears a lot more broken. “Ahaha…what?”

“You know, like, you and I...we’re friends?”

Kim pushes herself away from Trini and sits up, the blankets falling into her lap. “What do you mean ‘friends’?

Trini’s cheeks flush, and her eyes can’t seem to look away from Kim’s chest. “I-...er….are you saying you don’t want to be friends anymore?”

“Okay we’re clearly not on the same page here. Trini, we had sex last night! I kissed you like six times since yesterday! We’ve made out!” 

“I thought...that was-”

“I’ve told you I loved you, and you’re literally staring at my boobs right now.”

Trini shakes her head, and finally looks up at Kim’s face. She looks mad. Oh man, Trini’s really in for it now. “I….I thought you meant that as a friend...that all of..” she sits up and gestures vaguely, “ _this_ was...a friend thing...pla...tonic…” Her voice grows small. “No..?”

Kim sighs, and pinches the bridge of her nose, whispering frustratedly. “God, you’re an idiot..” She raises her voice a little louder and grips Trini’s shoulders firmly. “ Trini, I’ve been madly in love with you since we were kids. Not in a friend way, not in a family way, but in a “I want to fuck you and kiss you because I’m romantically interested in you way. Now do you understand?”

Trini bites her lip and gives a fast nod of her head. “I understand…”

“If you...don’t feel the same way, then…” Kim lets her go, and wraps her arms around herself defensively, “I need you to tell me. I can’t live my life without you in it...but I need you to tell me how you feel.”

Kimberly looks as if she’s about to cry, and Trini can’t bear to see her look so distraught. Why did she have to screw things up all the time? “Kim, I-...I’ve never dated anyone. I don’t know shit about what a normal relationship is really like, and I’ve never had any other friends aside from you, so I’m sorry that I’m so stupid. I didn’t even know two girls could date! I mean, when I first got my period, Rita just told me ‘that’s your problem’ and nothing else. I don’t know anything!” She wraps her arms around Kim and gives her a tight squeeze. “I’m sorry I’m such an idiot....But, I...I do love you. Romantically. ….Holy shit, I love you.” She shakes Kim a little. “I love you!”

Kim can’t help but laugh. She snorts a little, then covers her mouth with her hand and keeps laughing.

“Oh my gosh, did you just snort? That was adorable!!”

“Shut up! You didn’t know what a period was!”

“I thought I had internal bleeding!! That would have been normal for me!”

Kim’s smile drops. “Trini, what the fuck?”

“What?”

“Are you, like, okay?”

Trini seems to think about it for a minute, then gives her lover a nod of her head. “Yes, I’m okay. I guess there’s just a lot of things we still need to tell each other..”

Kim’s shoulders droop, and she sighs heavily. “Yeah...I guess we do. But we can take our time with that.”

“Okay. I just want you to know, Kim, that I’d do absolutely anything for you. It doesn’t matter what, if you say it, I’ll make it happen. I don’t want you to go through anymore pain..”

Kimberly presses her forehead against Trini’s, and bumps their noses cutely. “I believe you. But I just want you to be with me...that’s all I want.”

“I can do that. But can I ask for something in return?”

“Anything.”

“Kiss me.”

Kim’s eyes carry something intoxicating inside them, and Trini’s breath hitches in her throat. “You never have to ask, it’ll always be a yes.”

Their lips meet hungrily once more, and Trini pulls Kim’s hips flush against hers. How could this be anything but pure love? Trini should have known sooner. When their bodies connect, it’s like two pieces of a puzzle fitting into place. It’s so undeniably right, and when Kim’s hands are on her, Trini doesn’t have to worry about anything else. But now that Trini is aware of it fully, it’s infinitely better than before. 

“Oh, pardon my intrusion.”

The two girls jump at their visitor, and cling to each other tightly. Alpha’s lightbulb eyes blink in confusion.

“Oh come on!” Kim groans, and Trini covers them up with the bedsheets.

“I heard you two stir awake, and thought I’d come up to offer you both breakfast.” The robot says, and his head tilts with a whir. “Is this a friend thing?”

Kim scowls in annoyance, and Trini gestures to the robot with both hands, looking up to the girl on top of her as if to say “See?”

She’ll just have to let it go. One day.

\----------------

The roses are in full bloom today. Pink, and yellow, and colors in between. The two runaways walk through the estate’s gardens, shoulder to shoulder, pinkies linked together.

“So...this Rita person...is she the one in the painting?” Kim asks. They’d agreed to open up about their years apart, but already she could tell it wasn’t going to be easy for either of them. 

Trini takes a while to answer, thankful that her lover is patient. “Yeah. She is.” Trini inhales and exhales slowly through her nose, then laces the rest of her fingers with Kim’s. “After the Kwans and I left, we got into a car accident-flew off the road. I don’t remember how long I was stuck down at the bottom with their bodies. My bones were broken to hell, and I kept passing out. Rita was the one who found me. She took me home.

I was so fucking scared...she wouldn’t take me to the hospital, and the creepiest thing was she...she called me ‘her child’. So, Alpha helped me recover, and….I never escaped.”

Kim’s face is sullen, yet she gives Trini’s hand a supportive squeeze. “I can’t ever imagine what that was like...just having to go through that much…”

Trini nods, and they swing their arms in tandem as they walk. “Did you know? What happened? I saw a grave, at the orphanage. Did you...make that..?”

“Yeah, I did.” 

“Oh..”

“It was on the news, the accident. I remember Miss Holly flipping through all the channels, and when I caught a glimpse of the Kwans’ name on the banner, I made her go back. They said they’d...died instantly, and that you were nowhere to be found. They thought you’d been ejected out the window.” Trini gives a scoff of disbelief, and shakes her head. “I couldn’t stop crying...I couldn’t stop screaming...I knew-or, at least I thought I did- that you were dead, and I couldn’t take losing my best friend...You were...the only good thing about that place-about my life.”

“I’m sorry…”

Kim chuckles brokenly. “And what are you apologizing for? It’s not like you had a choice, did you?”

“Well, no...but I always felt guilty for leaving you. I tried to come back to you, after Rita took me in, but….let’s just say it didn’t go well.” They stop to sit on one of the stone benches, and Kim wraps her arm around Trini to stave off the cold. “I wrote to you for years. I could never send the letters, but I thought...maybe one day, I could. It helped me feel closer to you, even if I began to forget you.” Trini holds her breath for a moment, then lifts her head to look at her lover. “Did you ever...forget about me?”

“No, never.” It’s a quick answer, and Trini is a little surprised to hear it.

“Ever? Not once? In fourteen years?”

“Trini, I thought about you every single day. Your ‘death’ tore me apart, and I prayed every day that I was just having some...terrible nightmare. I could have never forgotten you.”

Trini sighs, and pulls her feet up onto the bench. “But I did….I asked you, in my letters, what your life was like. As we grew up, I tried to imagine for myself. What was it like, for you? Did you ever get adopted?”

Kim shakes her head. “No, I never did. I stopped trying. Living at that god awful prison without you was hell. When I got to highschool, I tried to act different. I guess, you could say I was pretty popular…”

“I knew it.”

“Oh shut up.” Trini nudges Kim with her shoulder, and Kim nudges her back. “I was a cheerleader.”

“Now _that_ I have trouble believing.”

Kim laughs lightheartedly. “It’s true. I was head bitch in charge, and everybody knew it.”

“Jesus. Did you have a boyfriend?”

The older woman falls silent, and Trini searches Kim’s face for any answers, or any signs that she may need just a little break. “I did.” she answers, at last. “His name was Ty. We started dating in the middle of freshman year.”

“Oh.” Trini’s mood drops further, and she can’t help but feel a little jealous, despite understanding that Kim was free to do whatever she wanted with her life. “Did you...sleep with him?”

“Yes,” Kim answers flatly. “God, he was awful. He smelled like beef and had _no_ rhythm.” Trini crinkles her nose in disgust, imagining the scene, and she desperately attempts to stray her mind from it. “He thought he was _sooooo_ good at it, but he couldn’t even finish half the time.” Kim slips her arm from around Trini’s shoulder, and rests her hands on the stone underneath her. Her voice falls into a low squeak. “God, I hated it…”

“But he was your boyfriend.”

“So? I didn’t love him or anything. I slept with him because I didn’t want to think about you. I didn’t want to be in pain anymore…”

“But you were.” Trini confirms.

Kim sighs. “All the time. I was so fucked up, I cried the first time with him. Bastard didn’t even notice..”

“Kim, that's terrible....you deserved so much better than that guy."

"I know. But it was...all I had."

Trini's heart hurts for her, and she has half a mind to end the conversation there. But then again, she's spent fourteen years not knowing anything about Kim, and she needs to know that there was _something_ good to come out of her best friend's life. "..Um...this next part, you don’t have to answer-I understand, and I’ll drop it completely- but, Jake and Jimmy…did they ever...? When did they st-”

“They were gone when they turned 18. But-” Kim takes a deep breath, but the tears welling in the corners of her eyes cut her short. “I’m sorry. I-can’t talk about it. _Fuck…_ ”

Kim wipes at her eyes with the back of her sleeve, and Trini swings her legs on either side of the bench so she’s facing Kim directly, and pulls her love to her chest snugly. Kim curls up onto the bench, and clutches onto Trini’s shirt so desperately as if she were going to drown if she ever let go. 

“I’m sorry...I’m so sorry…” 

Her chest heaves with her broken sobs, and Trini holds onto Kim as tight as she can, cooing softly to her, swaying gently from side to side. “You’re okay. You’re okay, I’ve got you. They can’t hurt you anymore…”

“G-god, if I could just kill him again….and again...and again..” she hisses through gritted teeth. “I would bleed them both dry for what they did..”

“They deserve that, and more. A thousand times over.”

“Trini, I-...I don’t know if I can ever get that _fucking_ feeling out of my mind. I spent so much time alone...I never felt safe...They took…so much away from me..” She laughs hysterically, and Trini begins to comb her fingers through Kim’s hair. “But who am I to say shit? Look at you! You’ve had it so much worse than I did!”

“Kim, you went through so much bullshit that you didn’t fucking deserve.” she says. “You’ve made it through all that, and you’re still here and more badass than ever. You’re alive, and those assholes are rotting. It just shows how strong you are.” She looks down at Kimberly, and cups her face in her hands gently. “But you never have to be alone again. I’m here now, and I’ll always keep you safe. I’ll be there, when you feel like you can’t move past it all. I’m never going to let anybody hurt you again. So never forget that. Okay?”

Kim sniffles, and nods weakly. “O-okay…” Her breathing slowly evens out, and Kimberly wipes the tears and snot from her face. “God, I love you…”

“I love you, too, Kim..” Trini kisses Kim lightly on the lips, and sweeps a remaining tear from her eye. “You are the greatest thing to happen to me. The most special thing…”

\------------------

The day had grown rather quiet, with both girls emotionally exhausted. Trini had taken to tuning up her beloved bike again in the garage, while Kim sat beside her to watch. She was very skilled with mechanics, Kim noticed, and it was clear that Trini felt a very strong attachment to the vehicle. Neither of them talks, neither seems to have the energy to. Admittedly, Kim feels a little ashamed of herself. 

She knows it’s part of healing, to open up. She knew she would have to, eventually. But Trini had just been so understanding and immediately took to making Kim feel safe and secure. Wasn’t she supposed to do the same? They both were supposed to get things off their chests, but Kim had inevitably dominated the moment. She wishes she could make it up to her, but any attempt to get Trini to talk about her own trauma now seems much too out of place and forceful. They had all the time in the world, after all. Nothing had to be aired out completely yet.

Trini’s face is neutral as she works on the bike, and Kim can’t help but wonder what must be going through her mind. She wonders, what life will have in store for them in the near future, but figures that she can do anything with Trini beside her. Still, the atmosphere had dropped so steadily since earlier, and Kim decides that she needs to make Trini feel appreciated too. 

Kim gazes outside the open garage, and spots Alpha in the distance. The robot rolls a rather large tire across the estate grounds towards the back of the house; suddenly, Kim has an idea. The former detective leaves her seat, and Trini watches her go, beginning to call out her name but falling short as Kim is already gone. She looks on with interest.

“Hey, Alpha!” Kim calls, and the tiny robot holds the tire still. “Ah, master Kimberly! Did you need anything?”

“Mas-? Whatever.” She points to the tire. “Where’d you get that from?”

“This? Oh! It belonged to an old automobile the previous master once brought home. I’m taking it apart for scraps!”

Kim nods along, although she’s not really listening. “Interesting, interesting...Do you need it?”

“Why, no, I was just taking it to a junk pile.”

“Do you think I can have it?”

Alpha’s head rotates, processing her question. “I suppose so, but what use would you have for something like this?”

Kim smiles, and leans down to the robot’s level, cupping her hand to her lips and speaking into where his ears would be if he were human. She’s not entirely sure if it makes a difference, but the sentiment is there. “-It’s for Trini.” She concludes, and Alpha’s humongous head makes a whirring noise of contemplation.

“Master Trini, you say?” Kim nods, and the strange duo shift their gazes to Trini inside the garage, whose shoulders scrunch up with them both staring at her. Kim’s grin widens, and she waves. Trini subtly waves back. “Why, master Kimberly, I think that’s a marvelous idea! I’m sure she will greatly appreciate the gesture!”

“That’s the plan!”

Alpha goes onto the other side of the tire and begins pushing it the other way. “Well, let’s go! There is much to do!”

Kimberly walks alongside Alpha, and when Trini steps out the threshold of the garage to follow, she holds her hand out and shouts from across the yard. “No, stay right there! I’ll be back, I promise!”

Trini stays still, as instructed, and watches Kimberly leave from her sight. She returns to her wheeled stool and plops down with a mild sigh. Her feet push along the ground until she rolls over to the counter space. She grabs the bag of chips resting there, and munches on them to ease her mind. Kim will be right back. Kim’s coming back. Her eyebrows furrow, and her chewing slows. What if she doesn’t? 

No no, she’ll be back. Alpha is with her, and he’d alert Trini if anything were to happen. This is fine.

Kim returns some time later, a big smile on her face. “Trini, Trini! …..Trini?” The older woman scans the garage for her lover, yet there is no sight of her. “Trini…?” Her heart rate increases from a leisurely walk to a steady jog, and Kim can’t help but jump to the worst.

What if she hurt herself and went to the little nurse’s office or whatever inside the house? How bad is she hurt? Oh my god, what if she’s _dead_? No no, where would she be, then? Kim would have heard if anything had happened to her. Alpha would know somehow right?

“Trini!!” She yells, rushing further into the garage. “Trin-” Her foot nearly steps on her. “Trini, what are you..?”

Her lover lies hidden behind the motorcycle-she’s so tiny no wonder Kim didn’t see her- with her arms and legs spread out wide. An empty bag of chips is crumpled up beside her, and the woman’s honey irises are transfixed to the ceiling.

“Oh, hey, Kim.”

“Trini, why are you on the floor?”

“I dunno, ‘s comfy.”

“.....Are you like this because I left?”

“You left? Huh, hm, wow, I didn’t-I didn’t even fuckin’ notice...I’m chillin’.”

Kim snorts , and chuckles at the woman. “You’re so weird..” She grabs Trini’s arm and yanks her to her feet. “Come on, I’ve got something to show you!” 

Trini immediately links their arms together, and Kim admittedly feels a lot better, herself. “Okay. Lead the way.”

They venture around to the gardens again, and Trini immediately spots the giant tire hanging from one of the larger oaks in the yard. “Kim, what is that?”

Kim looks to her lover, the biggest, brightest grin on her face. “It’s for you! It’s a tire swing!”

Trini’s eyebrows peak, and her heart flutters just a little. “You made me...a tire swing..?”

“Yeah, Alpha helped me! Have you ever seen him climb a tree? It’s kinda terrifying...”

“Just a little bit.” Trini lets go of Kim’s arm and heads over to the swing, running her hands over the old rubber. “I can’t believe you would do something like this for me…”

“Hm? Well, of course...I thought it would be just like the times where we’d sneak off to the park outside the city..”

Trini cracks a side smile. “You mean when _you_ would sneak off to the park..”

“Hey, you joined me!”

“Only to bring you back! God, how far did we have to walk, again?”

Kim shrugs. “Miss Holly would never realize it until somebody else told her.”

“That’s true. I’m still surprised we got away with it as much as we did.”

“It wasn’t that hard, anyways. Well, come on! Let’s try it out!”

Trini’s eyes light up, and the shorter woman bounces on her toes with a newfound, innocent sense of excitement. “Alright!”

Kimberly holds the tire steady as Trini jumps into the center hole. Once Trini is sat on the bulk of the tire, Kim grabs on to the sturdy chains upholding the swing and takes a few far steps back. Trini squeals in anticipation as the tire raises, and she holds on tightly to the tire. “Kim, Kim, watch out! Kim, Kim, what are you doi-AH, KIM!”

The taller woman gives a mighty push of the tire, laughing as Trini screams with happiness and sails backwards with the momentum. Kim laughs with her, and when the tire comes dipping forward again, Kimberly leaps onto the swing and grabs onto the chain. Trini squeaks again as the tire shakes, but she can’t help but laugh even harder as she watches the ex-detective stand tall and rock the swing from side to side.

The tree canopies swirl overhead, gentle sunshine peeking through the leaves. The whole world seems to go by in slow motion, drawing Trini’s eyes to everything about the woman in front of her, joyful as if she didn’t have a care in the world. Kimberly was beautiful, in every sense of the word. She is everything Trini wishes she could be, and yet everything she is proud to call hers. 

Trini closes her eyes and lets the wind blow through her hair as they glide through the treetops. Their hands are linked together in chains instead of ribbon, now, but Trini doesn’t mind; both of them have willingly thrown away the key.


End file.
